I think my husband and I will kill each other before we will be able to agree to a name.

Jenichael1217 · July 2015

Our naming philosophies are completely different so any time I like a name, he hates it and vice versa. I feel strongly that it should be a unique name, he feels strongly that it should be very traditional. I think I may rip my hair out over frustration with this naming business.

I dont want a kid to have to grow up having to go by their last initial like I did growing up. Jennifer is so common that I've literally had multiple Jennifer's on my 6 person team in the last three years. It makes things so confusing! In high school I remember being called the "smart Jennifer" or descriptive comparisons like that which make both parties feel awkward. I also want something unique enough that I don't know anyone with that name so I'm not picturing someone else when I hear our child's name.

DH has a very common name as well, Michael, but I guess he's always liked it and wants the kid to have a name "that would sound normal on a resume". I get his point and definitely don't want to name a kid something so out there that it's weird. However, I also feel like he doesn't know what names are "normal" in the current generation. I work with children for my job, but he's the youngest one at his company by at least ten years. I like a decent number of names that are in the current top 100, but are totally bizarre sounding to him. I'm scared all of the names he likes will sound like grandparent names by the time our kid is older. Ugh!

So basically, at this point I'm contemplating stealing the birth certificate and just writing a name in without his knowledge. Anyone else in the same predicament or have any advice?

Jenichael1217 · July 2015

Attached are the names I like. He prefers very traditional like David, Matthew, Nathaniel, John etc.

Beckah31 · July 2015

SO and I have very different philosophies too. Last pregnancy was easier- b/g twins we each took one and the other got veto power of it was something horrible.
I'm a teacher, so there are quite a few names that were just off the list completely. He'd call them out and Id tell him the horror story- that was usually enough to get him to let it go.
This time around, it's a little boy and we are most likely going with a family name (if you dig back far enough, it's usually possible to find an unusual but traditional name). We got lucky to find a great name from this baby's great grandfather that is both cool for a little guy, but will also look awesome on his presidential letter head. (Go big or go home).
I'm in the "traditional but did you have to butcher up the spelling, mom?" group. I love my name, but 33 years in- I'm dang sick of telling every person I meet how to spell it. Just another thing to consider.

Marchmellow2 · July 2015

I was in a similar predicament when I was pregnant with DS. I wanted a common name and he wanted very unique name. We both eventually compromised on a name that's not unique but semi-uncommon. DS's name is River and we both love it! It's uncommon but also not unique. Try looking at semi uncommon names and see what he says about some of those. You guys still have plenty of time to choose a name so don't lose patience yet! You guys will both fall in love with a name once you find it! Good luck!

Marchmellow2 · July 2015

Jenichael1217 said:
Attached are the names I like. He prefers very traditional like David, Matthew, Nathaniel, John etc.

Your names aren't unique at all! Hmmmmm. Maybe put it down for a while and come back to it in a month or so...? I don't blame you for not liking his lame choices lol! Way too traditional!

ammnam14 · July 2015

My husband and I have very different tastes when it comes to names. I want a more Spanish name because I love my culture. He wants more traditional names. He's head over heels in love with a name and I finally just agreed. I figured if I'm carrying the baby for 9 months he can pick the name to make him feel involved. Lol men. Good luck!

marlena1985 · July 2015

I'm right there with you! We both want something unique and he wants traditional as well. It is very frustrating! And now whenever I ask him if he likes a certain name he comes back with smartass replies such as, "How about the name Helmi?" Or some other off the wall name. We're also going to wait until the baby is delivered to find out the sex so we NEED to agree on at least 2 names with middle names. This baby may go a year without having a name..ugh! I hope you guys can agree on names soon!

0leahmarie · July 2015

I'm in the exact same boat as you. He's Kenneth the third so we agreed if it was a boy it would take his name and be the 4th but if it was a girl I could chose and he would get veto power.

Well it's a girl and he's abusing this stupid veto power and vetoing every name I like. I have actually told him I'm waiting till he goes to the bathroom and leaves the room to do the birth certificate.

redfallon · July 2015

Sloane is good. That was Ferris Bueller's girlfriend's name

KatherineAimee · July 2015

Bahahaha! You and your husband sound a whole like my husband (who is also named Michael) and I! I wanted a name that is a little different, but he hates them all! We have agreed upon 1 name thus far, but are still brainstorming. The issue my husband has is that he offers no suggestions, but keeps turning mine down! I too am contemplating stealing the birth certificate! Good luck!

stephydan · July 2015

Some old fashioned names are quite nice and would now be considered unique, my daughters now 14 and her names Millie which back then was a name that lots of people hadn't heard in donkey's years, it's slightly more common now but I like to think I restarted that trend lol, my son is called Charlie (which his dad chose) I thought it would of been a really common name but surprisingly he's the only Charlie in his school, I don't have a clue what u will call this one as chop and change my mind all the time, I'm gonna wait till I know the sex till I start making my list but my husband says it's my choice

khamilton2621 · July 2015

Some of the names on your list are pretty classic but haven't been used in a while. Maybe you could prove they are traditional names some how haha. My husband is the same way. I really only cared about naming our daughter Emerson and he hated it. We settled on Sophia Emerson though. Louis Taylor for a boy.

cdv2015 · July 2015

I noticed Liam on your list and was going to offer William (more traditional) with the nickname Liam. My father's name is William and I always wanted to pay tribute with Liam, but three girls later... no such luck.

Hope you guys can figure things out soon for your own sanity!

rockinmathchic · July 2015

Maybe nametrends.net can help you guys. This gives you baby name trends over time. You might find by typing in one of the names on your list that many of the names on your list are classic names. Maybe it will help bring your husband around to some of your choices, which I don't think are crazy unique or outrageous.

I did a quick search on Nora (which is one of the names my DH and I are considering and I LOVE) and it is a classic name that was extremely popular in the late 1800s and saw a huge drop but it is coming back now.

mrwphillips · July 2015

My husband and I settled on names after just a single day of serious discussion. We found first names we both liked a whole lot, and then just worked on middle ones. Good luck!

kemerson531 · July 2015

I agree with some of the PPs, that you can find a mix of traditional AND unique if you look further back in history for name inspiration. I know some name sites list names by decade, or even century, and I bet if you look in the 100-120 yrs ago range, you'll land on some good ones that are not totally off the wall but at least not heard every day. That's how I found my girl name I love, Georgia.

vbrannin2010 · July 2015

I'm having name problems too. We have three girls, but if this one is a boy, my husband wants a Jr. His name is James. I've always hated naming a kid after its parent. I believe that they should have their own name so as not to live under someone's shadow. We had agreed on Jonah except he's now changed his mind.
If we have another girl, this is our last baby, she'll carry his name by being named Jamie. Can't agree on a middle name, but my MIL has now said we must name her Emma or Jenny after her mom and my FIL's mom who are both deceased. I'm sorry, but they just don't go.
Who knew naming a kid would be so stressful?

misamima · July 2015

vbrannin2010 said:

I'm having name problems too. We have three girls, but if this one is a boy, my husband wants a Jr. His name is James. I've always hated naming a kid after its parent. I believe that they should have their own name so as not to live under someone's shadow. We had agreed on Jonah except he's now changed his mind. If we have another girl, this is our last baby, she'll carry his name by being named Jamie. Can't agree on a middle name, but my MIL has now said we must name her Emma or Jenny after her mom and my FIL's mom who are both deceased. I'm sorry, but they just don't go. Who knew naming a kid would be so stressful?

Geez, how presumptuous of her. It drives me bonkers when grandparents think they can just dictate what to name your child, even if it's the middle name.

haylierm · July 2015

Naming a child is so hard! Fortunately my husband and I have similar tastes so it hasn't been a huge fight or anything. Were just having a hard time narrowing it down. I totally agree with you about the trendy/ super common name thing too! It drives me crazy that this doesn't seem to bother other people too. Like sure, you might not want some cooky made up name, but it is it really that hard to google "most popular names of the year" and think hmm, maybe I don't want my kid to show up the first day of school and have the rest of the class have the same name? Or like you said, go by an initial or description. The issue I'm having with some of the names my husband likes is that while I like them just fine, I can't imagine saying them over and over and over again for the rest of my life, you know? I keep telling him he has to think of it that way instead of just, oh that's a cool uncommon name.

Mizuiro007 · July 2015

I would agree with others, just have to find a combination of traditional and unique. We pulled from history with our first and our picks this time from other countries then middle names honoring family members. We had a little trouble with the boy name this time. Hubby surprised me and chose a more common name for his choice. I offered up a foreign variation on his choice and he agreed. It's common in other parts of the world but very uncommon here.

@vbrannin2010 I can sympathize. My grandfather made all of us promise not to name after living relatives. He was named after his grandfather (living at the time) and was forced to go by his middle name because of it. It caused confusion when he was old enough to start working and was required to go by his legal name.

My MIL insisted if we have a boy we name him after her maiden name and brings it up every pregnancy. We had the name picked out before she mentioned it with out son so she missed that chance. Since then we finally told her since she's a redhead we'll name a boy after her maiden name if he's a redhead as well. May the odds be ever in our favor.

Laura&brad1 · July 2015

My partner told me I could chose the name since I am carrying the baby for him lol win for me or so I thought untill I chose the name Noah and was out voted by him and our daughter

I love the name Noah I think it beautiful so Noah will now be the middle name choosing names is so hard! I had so many girls names I liked I find boys names a lot harder

susiaustin · July 2015

SO and I had the opposite problem he wanted unique I wanted old world traditional. For a boy we were both set on Sebastian as it is traditional, yet it is not something you hear 4 of in every class room. For a girl it was weeks of trying to figure it out. I wanted to pick a name because with my previous loss I needed to in order to feel more attached. His daughter is Elexis, my daughter if I had gone to term would have been Elizabeth so we wanted to use an "E" name or at least I did. My parents were the weirdos who all 3 of us plus them all had the same middle initial so I wanted something like that for our kids. Finally after weeks of fighting I walked outside one day and asked him "what about Evangeline" out of the blue. It honors my moms loss after me as it is a similar name to Angelia, without it being the same name or such a common name, as well as following the "E" it's an older name that is not common with a million nickname choices. So now we know for sure I'm pregnant with Evangeline Hope. Traditional you can reach back farther and find an older name. I originally wanted Emmaline, but Emma too common in his eyes, but also sounds too old for a baby (really??) and he didn't think it suited our little one (because while I'm pregnant you know?) but for me Evangeline did it. Add the Disney reference (yes I'm an avid Disney fantastic). At least we didn't go with his first choice which was Katness after the hunger games character..,

Jenichael1217 · July 2015

I THINK we may have actually found boy and girl names that we both like!

Asher for a boy. It's a biblical name that means joyful. It's also kind of neat because DH and I met as counselors at a camp that names each group after one of the tribes of Israel. Asher wasn't our groups tribe, but neither of us were inclined to use the name Reuben.

It still kind of gives a nod to the organization that got us together.

I was surprised that DH actually really liked the name Beckett for a girl. We both like the show castle and the Beckett character is smart, brave, clever, etc. I can't really find anywhere that Beckett is used a girl first name, but we both think it sounds pretty feminine. We would probably do a more feminine middle name to go with it.

We find out a week from today if this little one will be Asher or Beckett!

Jenichael1217 · July 2015

@marlena1985 Haha! My husband has been doing the same thing! He keeps telling our friends like I like these ridiculous names!

TomekiaB · July 2015

I'm hoping for a girl because he is okay with most of the girl names I've suggested. If we are having a boy the name game will be intense, he likes the most boring boy names.

DH is a from Ukraine and his suggestions have been Billy and Bobby (I explained that those were nicknames for William and Robert, my dad's name is Willie and our relationship is not close enought that I'd name a child after him, my ex-step-brother's name was Robert and he was a creep so both of those are out). My husband's other suggestion is Viktor with 2 V's in our last name and the tradition of fathers name becoming child's middle name with a suffix of -vich....my husbands suggestion would literally have 5 V's, which is way to much for my English language ears!

My suggestions for boy have included: Malachi, Mikhail (slavic Michael), Mateo, Matthias (DH's name is slavic version of Matthew, these are variations I like--I don't want to do a junior), Nicolai (slavic Nicholas), Alexander is a common slavic name I like but DH's only niece already has the feminine version and the nickname is Sasha for both males and female versions of the name (so it would will not work for his family even if we did chose to use Alex as the nickname). I have also considered maiden names from my family for boys names (Walker and Nelson) but I think I like them more as middle names than first names.

nmonty15 · July 2015

Ugggh! I know this pain all too well. We had the perfect girls name picked out, but can't agree on a boys name (because of course that is what we're having) to save our lives. We're actually taking a break right now from figuring out a name...but we need to do it soon because I have baby nursery projects that need doing!! Let us know when you pick one, I'm sure it will be lovely and will suit your baby girl perfectly.

MrsGarlock · July 2015

OMG I went through the same thing I let him win. We are naming our boy Matthew James. I would rather see my hubby happy. I will name on next baby if we have one

stephydan · July 2015

I remember when I was pregnant with my daughter 15 years ago, I loved the name Chloe if she was a girl but every time I saw a baby/child their name always seemed to be Chloe and it wasn't till after she was born that we even thought of the name Millie, this time were stuck on a girls name (I like renee, my husband doesn't) but I like the names teddy, franklin or dexter for a boy

TomekiaB · July 2015

I just bought the Baby Name Wizard on Kindle...paperback would probably be better but I was impatient. Anyway, this book has great reviews on Amazon and it is different than a traditional dictionary of names. This book talks about how many people think they've chosen a really unique name and are shocked when it is suddenly top 10 (Sophia and Olivia). It has a great note on any associations of the name for instance OP a nickname for Piper is Pippa which is Kate Middletons sister but her name is the common (in the UK) Philippa. One of my favorites is actually they list several names that are likely sibling names that are pretty accurate based on computer modeling (and they aren't if you like Noah you'd chose Jonah for a brother). I am hoping the sibling section will help me come up with some boy names!

mac-n-cheesy · July 2015

@TomekiaB I bought the paperback version recently. It truly is a great book. I like the popularity curves because I am trying to avoid something too popular right now. Like you I also love the sibling names; it has even given me alternatives to the name being discussed that I like. I highly recommend this book.
DH and I are at a standstill. I am in love with a beautiful name that is unique but actually a real name and a character in Greek mythology but one that most people will not have heard of (unless you like the movie Inception as much as I do). DH is choosing all common names or names that sound very childish when you consider our baby will grow into a women and hopefully have a professional career.
If we have a boy next or at any time his middle name (and of course last name) all all pre-determined because of HIS family tradition so I feel I should have a little more say in our girl's name. For any future boy the name we choose has to sound good with the pre-determined middle and last name and that definitely limits us.
Thus, I would like to think if it comes down to it our little girl will get the name I am so in love with.

TomekiaB · July 2015

@Lynem29 Our last name is so strong finding names that work has been tough! Having a scandnavian mother and black southern father, I know how important finding a name that works for both cultures is, my name is unique and Southern while my brothers is pretty traditional German/Scandinavian. My dad's family has always called my brother by his middle name because they can't pronounce his first name, people struggle with my name in the midwest.

For girls I've picked slavic names with traditional nicknames that English speakers are familiar with that still say slavic (i.e. diminutives like Sasha, Natasha, Nadia, Anya). My husband finally agreed to a boy suggestion an hour ago, from the Baby Name Wizard! Augustus is strong enough for our last name without being as harsh as most of slavic boy names he doesn't have already have a bias against and Auggie is an cute easy but not terribly common nickname (I tried August originally but it still didn't have the strength our last name demands). I feel so much better that we officially have a boy name that we both agree is a contender that works! I don't have a front runner for girl's names yet but for whatever reason DH is a lot more open to girl names so we have a 2-4 that are in the running!

Edited to add, the traditional middle name kills me (and DH heritage it is for both genders...ugh, they already get his last name!). Augustus actually does work with the traditional middle name but I am going to savor today's victory and save that debate for another day

Mizuiro007 · July 2015

stephydan said:
I remember when I was pregnant with my daughter 15 years ago, I loved the name Chloe if she was a girl but every time I saw a baby/child their name always seemed to be Chloe and it wasn't till after she was born that we even thought of the name Millie, this time were stuck on a girls name (I like renee, my husband doesn't) but I like the names teddy, franklin or dexter for a boy

Why not Teddy (Theodora) for a girl? Even see if he'd be willing to use Renee as a middle name? BTW, I have a Dexter so I love that name.

@TomekiaB Our top name pick for a girl is Ebba. Not hard to pronounce but nice Scandinavian roots.

mowelt · July 2015

I love your list! Don't forget to check to make sure the names you choose isn't on an upward trend, if you are worried about them having to go by there last initial in school. While the names aren't common when you were growing up, I have recently seen these names often for babies(some more than others). Some of the more traditional names are actually no longer popular for this generation of babies. A great place I always check when I find a name I like is nameberry.com. For example Asher has gotten more and more popular lately. Just something to think about.

https://nameberry.com/babyname/Asher/popularity

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I think my husband and I will kill each other before we will be able to agree to a name.

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