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December 2015 Moms
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MIL Rant

amcgeorge0921amcgeorge0921 member
in December 2015 Moms
So I go to check my FB this morning and have a msg from someone I don't even know telling me she saw on my MIL's post that DH and I are expecting and wanted to say congrats... We specifically asked MIL not to say/post anything about us expecting as it took us a year to conceive and wanted to wait until the 20 week ultrasound before announcing on social media. Before this we have had no contact with her for about 18 months due to a bunch of drama she caused leading up to, at, and after our wedding. Personally I don't care if we and LO never see/speak to her again as she is just extremely immature, 2 faced and disrespectful to me, however, in the past she mentioned suing for grandparents rights if we try to keep LO from her. Basically she has pissed me off to no end today by stealing our chance to announce the pregnancy but it's hard to call her out on it as I have her blocked on FB so can't see exactly what she posted. Why can't she just either grow up or go away??? End of rant
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Re: MIL Rant

  • MegStarkMegStark member
    Sorry she's acting like that. What does your DH think? Hopefully you don't have many mutual FB friends so you can still make your own announcement. 

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  • GardenMama116GardenMama116 member
    Sorry you are going through this. I understand where you are coming from and don't blame you for wanting to sever all ties.
    I suggest you read up on Grandparents Rights in your state. It doesn't sound like they can petition the court for visitation just because you deny them seeing their grandchild. From what I've briefly read, there has to be some sort of grievance or death for visitation to be considered. Best of luck to you!
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  • redfallonredfallon member
    Hopefully this will make you feel better about her ability to sue for grandparents' rights: https://grandparents.about.com/od/Grandparents-Rights/tp/Learn-Legal-Principles-Used-in-Grandparent-Visitation-Law.htm

    https://grandparents.about.com/od/Grandparents-Rights/tp/Things-You-May-Not-Know-About-Grandparents-Rights.htm


    Jamie


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  • amcgeorge0921amcgeorge0921 member
    Thanks ladies:) I don't think she would have a leg to stand on anyways. I mean she showed DH a video of her 2-1/2 yo grandson pretending to smoke a cigarette butt and thought it was hilarious plus keeps him up til 3 AM feeding him candy and soda when he had a fever so I think she wouldn't be taken seriously anyway. DH is going to call her today. He was furious when I told him. I mean I feel bad cuz that's his mom and all but she crossed a line big time, once again and I think this will be a life long battle with her
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  • misamimamisamima member
    amcgeorge0921 said:
    Thanks ladies:) I don't think she would have a leg to stand on anyways. I mean she showed DH a video of her 2-1/2 yo grandson pretending to smoke a cigarette butt and thought it was hilarious plus keeps him up til 3 AM feeding him candy and soda when he had a fever so I think she wouldn't be taken seriously anyway. DH is going to call her today. He was furious when I told him. I mean I feel bad cuz that's his mom and all but she crossed a line big time, once again and I think this will be a life long battle with her
    Yikes. She sounds like a handful.
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  • yl1m32015yl1m32015 member
    I don't know how your state is, but here in MI grandparents have no rights and cannot get rights unless very specific circumstances. I've checked into it because my in laws can be a pain too. I can't believe she disregarded your wishes like that, so disrespectful!
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  • angetralalaangetralala member
    Your post makes me angry just reading it! Some people have no way of living life except to make everything about them as much as possible.
    Angela

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  • MrsBwIVFMrsBwIVF member
    Op, this is terrible! I'm sorry your in law in such a bad person but I'm so very happy that DH is on your side about it!
    You stick to what you feel is right. I doubt she'd actually take you to court, even if she was allowed in your state, with how expensive it'd be for her.
    ***Trying to conceive since 9/12- m/c 2/13 from natural conception.
    IVF success 10/14 with m/c 11/14. FET success 4/15***

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  • beccabeeeebeccabeeee member
    Is grandparents rights a real thing!?! I seriously had no idea. Either way, that's pretty crappy what she did. It's good your DH is on your side though. Hope everything works out!
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  • katiemeowtkatiemeowt member
    Your MIL sounds extreme. My MIL also posted on her FB that we were expecting. We hadn't yet done so and had also mentioned we weren't ready to go public. She was a little dramatic when we asked her to take it down (crying, saying she'd "screwed up with us"), but that's just her personality. So sorry your MIL is giving you that drama!
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  • jutondreaujutondreau member
    She sounds like a challenge to say the least. I'm sorry you're having to deal with her and her drama. Some people thrive on making others miserable. It is good you have your DH to stand by this and take the lead with her. That's the way it should be.

    Most states do not recognize grandparents' rights AND she would have to have a pre-existing relationship with the kiddo to even start requesting them...obviously if a relationship doesn't exist, she's SOL.

    Hang in there mama...
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  • momotheflyinglemurmomotheflyinglemur member
    As everyone has been saying previously, there is not much to go on with the GP Rights, so that's good. But I know how you feel. My father and I have kept out of each other's lives because it is seriously best for both of us. I worry everyday that he is going to come out of the woodwork and start being outrageous like he was when I was younger. Good luck to you. Stay strong and I hope that things work out for you!
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  • april172010Uapril172010U member
    I understand you are upset. However, she seems to just be excited. Yes, she spoiled some fun, but really in the grand scheme of things it is social media.
    I also didn't understand a mother's love until I had kids, but I love my two kids beyond belief. I hope they never use my faults to cut me out of their lives. We all screw up, have a little compassion. She did give you your dh. I'd then learn and not tell her things until you want the world to know. Good luck!
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  • 3JTMom3JTMom member
    That is hard. I am sorry she is making life hard for you and your DH. Some In-laws seem to think they can live vicariously through their kids. I agree with April, she cannot do anything with information that she does not know. It might be a better way to keep the relationship within boundaries, to only let her know what you want to be made public. It is good to have grandparents, to be a part of your kids lives. But I do agree also that they need to be told your boundaries and they should expect to stay within those boundaries. Here is an article that might be helpful. Hugs mama and congratulations!

    -notautomatic-
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  • lovenlight77lovenlight77 member
    Im sorry you have to go through this. My mother is the issue for mine. She told me she HAD to tell her sisters, who I specifically told her I didn't want knowing yet (I was 5wks and had 3 MC's prev.), bc "it's a 'sister' thing". I had to text them to beat her to the punch. .. sux! Glad I'm not the only one w a crazy future gma... hope it gets better! Feeling your pain! Congrats on LO!
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