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October 2015 Moms
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Alone until Saturdaynight

MelMel92MelMel92 member
in October 2015 Moms
I know that some of you do this entire thing alone for varying reasons, but gosh I'd never be able to do that. Mad kudos to all you women going through this thing alone!

DH just left on his business trip to California (we live in Wisconsin) and wont be home until late saturdaynight. Between being incredibly weak because of the way my pregnancy has gone so far, being terrified of needing to go to the ER again, and having to look after a hyperactive puppy that's also been having health issues, I just dont know how I'm going to make it til then. What if she needs to go to the vet? I have no way of taking her. I have no drivers licence, I have no friends here, closest family is my in laws who are 4 hours away. What the heck will I do if something goes wrong at all? Because of immigration being slow, all I really *have* is my expired visa and a letter from them saying it'll be at least another 6 months until they can get a green card to me. I'm feeling incredibly lost already.. How would you ladies deal with this? I have very bad anxiety which obviously isnt exactly helping me out right now..
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Re: Alone until Saturdaynight

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    NatalieBrooke2007NatalieBrooke2007 member
    I would try working out. Take a long walk or something. I usually feel great afterward and really calm.
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    anorthroanorthro member
    Oh my goodness.  That sounds stressful.  It sounds to me like the only thing you can do is take a bath and read a good novel.  I hope everything goes smoothly until your SO gets home!
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    elmann1elmann1 member
    Just go into thinking that nothing will go wrong. This is a great opportunity to start practicing being alone. Your DH may need to travel again when baby is here, and you've already done it like a pro once. Go for walks, get groceries, do things that will make you feel empowered, not helpless. You are a strong mommy, sure you have obstacles but prove to yourself that you can overcome them. Walk the pup, make big dinners for yourself, get groceries or treats. When DH calls to check up on you you'll get to brag and he'll be very proud of you :) 
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    MelMel92MelMel92 member
    Thanks girls :) Took the pup for two decent walks yesterday, cant go too far because of restrictictions my OB put me on sadly, but two 20 minute walks should be ok I'd imagine. I'd absolutely love to be doing grocheries and making nice meals, but I havent gone for my drivers licence yet as I need to be able to prove that I am here legally, so I have to wait immigration to get off their behinds and do their job. Closest store would be an hour walk there and back, which sadly is just too much. I've been cleaning the house, but there's only so much to clean! I've run out of things to organise already. I'm so ready for more baby stuff to get here, would give me a whole nother room to fret over :P

    DH wont be calling to check up on me. The genius somehow broke his phone on sunday and well, tmobile is slow enough for the replacement to have arrived just 40 minutes ago. Im still impressed with how he broke it though, the glass is completely intact yet he shattered the touch sensitive screen below it. The man has some talent! :P

    First night wasnt a whole lot of fun. Couldnt get the pup to calm down for the life of me, she was obviously missing her daddy. Still not sure what she wanted from me. She'd bark every time I'd sit down at my desk. So I'd get up to turn away from her until she'd stop because I dont want to encourage the barking.. She'd stop for 5 seconds, i'd turn around and she'd be uninterested in my attention whatsoever, until I'd sit down again.  ~X(  She normally at least wants something. And itd be fine if this werent happening after midnight.. I stayed up until I could see that his plane was landed, so hopefully I can avoid her crazy hours tonight.
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    jefinley1jefinley1 member
    Hope you're doing OK so far sticking it out! This is pretty much my constant life right now. While it sounds like my pregnancy is pretty much complication free in comparison to yours, I get the fear of something happening, especially as I move closer to my due date. I won't lie, the question of "Oh God, what will I do if..... happens while he's gone," runs through my head every time he leaves, and there were moments in my first and early second trimester when I was convinced I was going to die over a toilet with no one to find me. 

    Books are awesome, and I am a big reader, but I actually find that finding a Netflix show I can play in the background is helpful for me. Or an audio book. Something about having voices makes the being alone more manageable. I spend a lot of time planning and managing bills, or generally life things life remembering family events and getting the calendar in manageable order to make it easier on the back end so when he gets home we can just focus on spending time together. It has also been a great time for me to really spend a lot of time on the phone with my mom. This phase has been the best thing for our relationship over my entire life thus far which is kind of cool.

    For me, the first night alone is always the hardest, and I always sleep worse when he's gone. To the extent that now that I have added energy zap of pregnancy I actually have to catch up when he gets home! I don't know if that's actually helpful or just more depressing, but know that you're not alone, and you will survive even if sometimes it doesn't feel like it. Good luck! And if it is getting really hard, I know occasionally I am still, after 2 1/2 years of him constantly traveling, not above a countdown on my phone. :)
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    taralohsetaralohse member
    Try to relax! I know this is easier said than done because my husband just went away last weekend for 2 nights and it felt like FOREVER! I couldn't sleep and MIGHT have cried a little. 

    Is there anyone you can call if something happens? I think having someone on speed dial would put me at ease. 

    Also, I live in Wisconsin too so know that someone close by is thinking of you!!!



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    psuchic629psuchic629 member
    I'm in the same boat, and my husband is actually traveling to WI. I'm used to being alone, but it's different now that I'm pregnant. Know that I'm thinking of you!

    I scheduled some time with friends this weekend to take my mind off things and stay busy. I also plan on organizing baby stuff as well. We moved, and things are still in disarray.
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    psuchic629psuchic629 member
    We could also do a daily check in if that would be helpful.
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    leighann1leighann1 member
    Just want to say, hang in there! My husband was gone last month for a guy's vacation for about a week, and while I tend to enjoy the solitude, I got lonely. I did, however, live it up with my favorite take out (we never get delivery pizza because he hates it), and a bunch of Netflix shows he wouldn't want to watch. Try to find some ways to treat yourself, even if you're kind of stuck in the house!
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