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pregnant and no friends

jharrison119jharrison119 member
in 2nd Trimester
Friends are seldom to none in my life . I prefer it that way because it's less drama and b.s you have to deal with . But I can honestly say it hurts to know my immediate family my boyfriend and parents best friends are the only real "friends" I have . I had a best friend for the past 3 years and we had a falling out last year due to my current boyfriend and father of my child . Basically she was jealous of the relationship I had with him once he moved back to our home town bc we started dating while he was stationed in arizona . Once he got here that's when everything went left . we used to party a lot together but of course once you're in a relationship that has to slow down . She took it as I changed my everything for him and wasn't that same . It also made it difficult to hang with her because she wanted to always be on the party scene and was trying to make money from it . With me working 2 jobs and having the man of my dreams no longer half way across the country I thought she'd understand . But she doesn't and swears he's horrible for me . It's frustrating because she I can't convince her how great he is for me and all the wonderful things he's done for me and our soon to be new family . He's sacrificed sooo much to be with me . But to wrap this up . I've been on bed rest since may 22nd and all my other so called friends including her have volunteered to come see me once they found out I was on bed rest . Not one has come yet but my parents best friends made it to come see me the other day . The one friend i had the falling out with said she was going to come see me before she left for the air force . she didn't come the day she would and waited till like 2 days before she had to leave to tell me she was going to come see me but I was already in the hospital at that time about 45 mins from where we all live . Im not the type that needs a bunch of friends; just one or 2 will do esp now when I want to have girl talk and I can't because there's literally no one here to have it with . The nurses I've gotten to know here are more of my friends then any of my so called friends back home .

With this rollercoaster ride of a pregnancy it would be nice to see ppl that say they care about me but ppl always prove me right . I'm very thankful for my family and boyfriend that are here with me now but ppl wonder why I don't talk to anyone besides if I see you at work or school . Ppl suck and I just hate the fact that they would say they're going to come and see me and never do . I just want to have my baby boy and get away from everyone with my boyfriend and start somewhere fresh .

Is anyone else going thru this or feels alone ?

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Re: pregnant and no friends

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    Snoflakes4evaSnoflakes4eva member
    jharrison119 said:
    Friends are seldom to none in my life . I prefer it that way because it's less drama and b.s you have to deal with . But I can honestly say it hurts to know my immediate family my boyfriend and parents best friends are the only real "friends" I have . I had a best friend for the past 3 years and we had a falling out last year due to my current boyfriend and father of my child . Basically she was jealous of the relationship I had with him once he moved back to our home town bc we started dating while he was stationed in arizona . Once he got here that's when everything went left . we used to party a lot together but of course once you're in a relationship that has to slow down . She took it as I changed my everything for him and wasn't that same . It also made it difficult to hang with her because she wanted to always be on the party scene and was trying to make money from it . With me working 2 jobs and having the man of my dreams no longer half way across the country I thought she'd understand . But she doesn't and swears he's horrible for me . It's frustrating because she I can't convince her how great he is for me and all the wonderful things he's done for me and our soon to be new family . He's sacrificed sooo much to be with me . But to wrap this up . I've been on bed rest since may 22nd and all my other so called friends including her have volunteered to come see me once they found out I was on bed rest . Not one has come yet but my parents best friends made it to come see me the other day . The one friend i had the falling out with said she was going to come see me before she left for the air force . she didn't come the day she would and waited till like 2 days before she had to leave to tell me she was going to come see me but I was already in the hospital at that time about 45 mins from where we all live . Im not the type that needs a bunch of friends; just one or 2 will do esp now when I want to have girl talk and I can't because there's literally no one here to have it with . The nurses I've gotten to know here are more of my friends then any of my so called friends back home .

    With this rollercoaster ride of a pregnancy it would be nice to see ppl that say they care about me but ppl always prove me right . I'm very thankful for my family and boyfriend that are here with me now but ppl wonder why I don't talk to anyone besides if I see you at work or school . Ppl suck and I just hate the fact that they would say they're going to come and see me and never do . I just want to have my baby boy and get away from everyone with my boyfriend and start somewhere fresh .

    Is anyone else going thru this or feels alone ?

    I am sorry you are feeling alone but friendship is a two way street. You have to give some to get some. Have you called your friends to ask how they are doing?

     I am sensing that there is a lot more to the story about your best friend and boyfriend.

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    jharrison119jharrison119 member
    i told her before she left to send me her address info so that i could write to her bc she wont have her phone or email till november . she said she would but i haven't heard from her since .
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    groovylocksgroovylocks member
    I know how you feel. 

    I moved to Michigan from Nova Scotia when my husband (from Michigan) and i got married. 

    I have made some very nice acquaintances at work and some of them i can almost call friends but it's not the same.

    My best friends are all back in Halifax. And it took me years to make those friends. I'm like you... it takes me awhile to call somebody a friend and feel like they are HOME to me. 

    And I feel very alone without their direct support. 
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    amama3amama3 member
    edited July 2015
    Sometimes I feel like it is just me and the baby. I wish I had people that cared more about me and wanted to know how me and the LO are doing. I try to stay in contact with people but I eventually fade into the distance when they don't seem to care about me. I don't mind just a couple real friends. Even my closest friends seem to be more interested in partying or there boyfriends to make time for me. It gets rather lonely at times :( I just wish I had more support and was able to share more about this emotional yet exciting time of my life. If you ever want to talk just inbox me @jharrison119 :)
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    tbasinskitbasinski member
    Im the same way. Growing up I moved a lot. It made me have to learn to get to know people quickly and also not to get too close to anyone. as I've gotten older I've become more of a home body and I put my kids/DH first before friendships. I have 2 close friends but that's it. I keep busy and have friends at work, but if hanging out with them interferes with being with my kids, I don't hang out with them. It does make me feel lonely, but I do realize that at the end of the day that's my fault. If I'm not willing to go out of my way to do stuff with people then they probably won't want to hang out with me.
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    selimunozselimunoz member
    Feeling the same way, the best thing I've learned to do is to always tell my BF how I'm feeling or my mother . And when they're at work I like to write what I'm feeling in my memos on my phone . Or just start talking to my baby. At the end of the day our babies will be all we have and we will be all they have. I know it sucks being alone and not having people to talk to but knowing your baby is healthy and finding a couple things to keep you busy is the best, if it's writing reading drawing or just looking at online stores to see how you'll fix your baby's crib what type of style you'll have your baby be.
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    kabnpaujkabnpauj member
    I moved to my husband's town after I got married and left all my friends and family back home, 6 hours away. I don't have any friends here at all. I remember I had a minor surgery and my husband was deployed so I drove myself to and from the hospital. I had to go to the store myself on same day to get medicine with half my face wrapped. :( I miss my family and friends dearly, especially my best friend.

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    FunnyGal18FunnyGal18 member
    I know how you feel. If they didn't want to be there for you when you needed them most, then they weren't your real friends anyways. Most people just take, take, take and it's hard to find people who genuinely care about someone other than themselves.

    I chose to have few friends bc I got tired of helping girls who didn't appreciate me and used me. I found a lot of time to work on myself and do the things that I enjoyed doing but I did these things alone.

    You won't be alone for long though. You are going to have a beautiful little person who needs and love you so much. Maybe you will meet another mom at the park or something. Idk how my old friends don't get tired of getting drunk and going out all of the time.

    Big hugs to you because you deserve it
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