November 2015 Moms

Toddlers hitting and kicking...

So, I went to the Pinterest and found a site with some kids books for DD(always looking for the next story).

She is currently big on hitting and kicking when she's frustrated. I bought two books today, Hands Are Not For Hitting and Feet Are Not For Kicking. Does anyone have these? What did/do you think? Helpful at all? Waste of $15.00?

She'll be 21 months on the 6th and she's not really using words just yet so she can't tell me what's frustrating her.
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Re: Toddlers hitting and kicking...

  • Oof, I remember this stage. I personally did not get those books but books are always good with things like this. They are probably fine. What also may help is reiterating every time she has her "meltdown" that you understand that she is frustrated but that we need to use our words to show our frustration and not our hands and feet. Hope this phase passing for you quickly. Good luck!
  • I've used teeth are not for biting. I'm assuming these are in the same series. Very good book! Maybe see if you can find them on amazon or somewhere used for a little cheaper?
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  • @Squirtgun I did order from Amazon. They were about 7 each. They are part of the same series as the biting book.

    @helskos how long was your LO in that phase? Did your sitters jump on board (if you had any)?
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  • katie10287katie10287 member
    edited June 2015
    I always sort of over act and be dramatic about how hitting and kicking hurts my body and my feelings. Then if it happens again I get up and walk away and tell the kids that I can't play with and/or hold them until they're ready to treat me gently.

    Those books are pretty good but I would make sure that you don't get into a habit of pulling them out to read every time your LO hits or kicks because they might do it so they can be read to.

    ETA words are too hard today lol
  • My son was never much of a hitter. I always made a big deal of telling him not to hit others even if he's playing I correct him right away. I have family members who hit each other WAY to much in front of him (kids) so when they do that I tell him right away that was bad. If he's upset he'll usually hit himself. Which is what I need to work on because it drives me nuts. I just tell him he needs to tell me what's wrong other wise I will have no idea what's wrong with him.
  • kwaldykwaldy member
    I read an article online about toddler behaviors... I'll have to find it again, but it was a pretty good read with suggestions on how to deal with the phase and teach correct habits of dealing with frustration.
    Children do it because they don't have great control of their emotions and responding to them. I figure those books wouldn't hurt though!
  • Did you look for it at your local library. I feel Like $15 is a lot for a book that is not worth keeping around after the "job" is done
  • I didn't look at the library :( I paid $15 for two books. I'll keep them around for this next LO, though. When I'm finished, I'll probably donate them to my local library. I usually donate all of my used books.
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  • JLW0504 said:

    @Squirtgun I did order from Amazon. They were about 7 each. They are part of the same series as the biting book.

    @helskos how long was your LO in that phase? Did your sitters jump on board (if you had any)?

    We're still in that phase! Haha! Now he just kind of throws things and stomps his feet when frustrated. The hitting and kicking last maybe a year. He stopped around age 3. He was in daycare and his teachers were very helpful. They put me at ease and advised that it's very normal.

    Since your daughter is not speaking yet, she is having troubling communicating her emotions with you. That's why she's kicking and hitting. It should go away once her vocabulary grows which you should see in the coming year between age 2 and 3.

    Get ready mama! She's about to start talking up a storm. My little guy did.
  • We used the "Teeth are Not for Biting" book at the daycare I used to work at. It seemed to help the biter we had in the room.

    Time outs worked for DD. We'd give her a warning and explain that it's not nice to hit or hurt people. She seemed to get it especially after being hit by other kids. She then understood that it could hurt.
  • Funny I just bought those two books (hitting and kicking ones) per my ped's recommendation at her 2 year check up last month. She's been hitting for quite some time and it puts my anxiety through the roof when we're with other kids. We've been reading these every night before bed and practice during the day of what we can do with our hands (hand shake, wave, etc). When she does hit, I've been saying things directly from the book.

    I've also been telling her before we play with other kids-- like right as I'm taking her out of her stroller-- that if she hits, kicks or pushes then we are leaving right away. I've stayed consistent with it and have had to leave many times. Today though, she played so nicely with some kids she didn't know while we were at the indoor playground. She didn't hit once. I'm hoping this is the light at the end of a long tunnel.



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