I am LIVID at my boss ...this is a long one

kandb521 · June 2015

So I'm 8 weeks pregnant today, but last Thursday at my appointment I mentioned to my doctor that I had some spotting that just started. Knowing my history (MC in feb) she examined me and said I should go on bed rest until I didn't bleed for 2 days. Instantly I was upset, thinking the worst and also thinking oh great I'm going to have to tell my boss. I was hoping to wait til at least 12 weeks.

Given how upset I was I couldn't call him so I sent him an email explaining my situation and how this isn't my first pregnancy so I'm taking all the steps to prevent it from happening again. He responded and it was very heartfelt and I thought, wow that's a great response. So I thought all was good with that. Worked from home on Friday with no problem.

Weekend went by and my spotting stopped so I am back to work and hopeful everything is fine (will know at US and appt on Thursday).

Come to find out today that my boss, the owner of the company I work for, announced my situation, including that I had a previous miscarriage to the leadership team in a meeting on Friday morning to let them know that we may have limited capacity with marketing activities for awhile if I need more time off. Meanwhile I told him in my email that I would WFH and was hopeful I could return to the office on Monday.

WTF!!! That is personal medical information about an employee. I was so mad, crying and shaking for an hour. I feel so disrespected and I can't believe he would do that. It's one thing to say that I'm dealing with personal issues but another to go into detail and say I'm pregnant, and had a miscarriage before. I'm so so mad at this point all I want to do is walk out. My family doesn't even know and for him to tell other people without my permission is morally wrong.

Please tell me I'm right on this one!!

kayjay44 · June 2015

kandb521 said:

So I'm 8 weeks pregnant today, but last Thursday at my appointment I mentioned to my doctor that I had some spotting that just started. Knowing my history (MC in feb) she examined me and said I should go on bed rest until I didn't bleed for 2 days. Instantly I was upset, thinking the worst and also thinking oh great I'm going to have to tell my boss. I was hoping to wait til at least 12 weeks. Given how upset I was I couldn't call him so I sent him an email explaining my situation and how this isn't my first pregnancy so I'm taking all the steps to prevent it from happening again. He responded and it was very heartfelt and I thought, wow that's a great response. So I thought all was good with that. Worked from home on Friday with no problem. Weekend went by and my spotting stopped so I am back to work and hopeful everything is fine (will know at US and appt on Thursday). Come to find out today that my boss, the owner of the company I work for, announced my situation, including that I had a previous miscarriage to the leadership team in a meeting on Friday morning to let them know that we may have limited capacity with marketing activities for awhile if I need more time off. Meanwhile I told him in my email that I would WFH and was hopeful I could return to the office on Monday. WTF!!! That is personal medical information about an employee. I was so mad, crying and shaking for an hour. I feel so disrespected and I can't believe he would do that. It's one thing to say that I'm dealing with personal issues but another to go into detail and say I'm pregnant, and had a miscarriage before. I'm so so mad at this point all I want to do is walk out. My family doesn't even know and for him to tell other people without my permission is morally wrong. Please tell me I'm right on this one!!

Go to HR. They are not allowed to divulge this kind of information by law.

kandb521 · June 2015

I went to HR but not sure much will be done except to tell him he can't do that and shouldn't in the future. It's a small company and he's the owner so I don't see this going anywhere. I've lost all respect for him.

kayjay44 · June 2015

kandb521 said:

I went to HR but not sure much will be done except to tell him he can't do that and shouldn't in the future. It's a small company and he's the owner so I don't see this going anywhere. I've lost all respect for him.

Then honestly, go to the state agency (Ours is the Department of Labor and Industries) and report it. It is not legal to disclose medical information that isn't pertinent to your job without your consent. And start looking for a new job. It doesn't sound like you'll qualify for FMLA anyway.

lauren0571 · June 2015

100% right. What he did was very disrespectful and I am not sure if it was ethical.
I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. Hang in there.

Edited to add: I'm not sure if you'd feel comfortable but this might be something for HR.

jennpar21 · June 2015

If he is the owner then the only thing to do is contact someone outside the company if you really wanted to push the issue, otherwise as far as inside the company he can do as he pleases unfortunately. Where I work is family owned and they let an expectant mother go and offered to pay through her maternity leave, she didn't pursue any legal action and everyone went on there way with her drawing full pay until 8 weeks post postpartum. What he did isn't right at all it's just up to you how much you value your job, I'm sorry!

je5sc0 · June 2015

Ick! So sorry! Don't have any useful advice other than what PP have said. Good luck!

RRC216 · June 2015

reading your post I blurted out OH SHIT! Ok this is NOT ok! I personally would have a talk with him. Contacting someone outside the company may be more difficult and cause you more stress. Do what you are comfortable with! I am so sorry he did this to you! It is extremely unfair! HUGS!

Ju111310 · June 2015

Maybe it was just an honest mistake? I know it's no excuse for his oversharing, but in his mind he may have thought he was just sharing the facts with the team so everyone could be supportive. If you love your job, I'd probably just explain to him how it made you feel and try to move on.

DylansCandyBar · June 2015

Just FYI, your employer is not bound by HIPAA. Looking at it from a business standpoint, he's just trying to ensure that things go smoothly if you need to be out. I'm sure he didn't intend to upset you.

kayjay44 · June 2015

DylansCandyBar said:

Just FYI, your employer is not bound by HIPAA. Looking at it from a business standpoint, he's just trying to ensure that things go smoothly if you need to be out. I'm sure he didn't intend to upset you.

Employers are typically only bound by HIPPA as it relates to an employer sponsored heath plan, but it's protected information under the ADA, FMLA, and many state laws.

I am LIVID at my boss ...this is a long one

Re: I am LIVID at my boss ...this is a long one

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