hopeful (or delusional?)

Tomerine · June 2015

Ok, so I'm 12 dpo. Usually by now I've had some spotting, if not my period. I HAVE had some spotting, but it's scant and pinkish brown- not my usual leading up to AF spotting (TMI, sorry), and today nothing. I've been crampy the last few days and was dizzy this past weekend (and a little today). I haven't been temping bc this month got all screwed up, but I notice that the last few months I've had heavier spotting or AF by day 10 or 11 (day 13 in March, though). It's possible AF will come in with a vengeance tomorrow, but I find myself still holding out hope. Am I crazy? Actually I know I am crazy because I have been feeling the potential sadness coming if this doesn't turn out to be the cycle for me. It's stronger than it has been the past few months, so I think that's why I'm desperately holding out hope. Our timing was really good this month, so I just don't know. I know you don't either. I just needed an outlet as almost no one knows we're trying...

Thanks for listening.

:-??

Tomerine · June 2015

I should mention that I'm also afraid to pee on a stick which is stupid bc that would obviously answer my own question. I'm just too superstitious to do it until Sunday. Maybe tomorrow.

jilligan14 · June 2015

I admire your willpower in waiting this long to test!!! It all sounds promising but I also know how much we can read into every little sign or believe that anything different must be a good thing. I'm really starting to symptom spot and I'm only 10dpo!! I think you could test tomorrow or wait one more day until Sunday. My fingers are so crossed for you!!!

KirstenAlecia · June 2015

I have the same sort of will power. I never POAS. The one time i did and got a BFP I waited days and days.......i was so sure I wasn't.

You could get a + at 12 DPO possibly

carrieandr · June 2015

I hope you get good news!!

Tomerine · June 2015

Ok I peed on a stick. I assume it's negative and that I am still delusional and reading into things. I can see a line. It's really really really faint. I'm wishing I'd looked at the test before I took it because I can't tell if it's a line that's there bc that's what WOULD get darker if I were preggo, or if it's for real. I had a little more spotting today but again very minimal and not typical. This is making me crazy.

jilligan14 · June 2015

Hmmm...if there definitely was a line, even a super faint line, then that sounds very promising!!! But sometimes you can squint so hard that your eyes play tricks on you (this has happened to me before). I guess the only way to know for sure is to test again tomorrow or the next day. I'm really hoping that line was for real, though!!!

Tomerine · June 2015

Thank you, @jilligan14.
I. Hate. Limbo. So not good at it!

jilligan14 · June 2015

I hear ya! I'm debating about whether to test tomorrow (12dpo) or to wait until Monday (13dpo). I just can't stand waiting any longer!!!

Knottie16743552 · June 2015

A faint line is still a line!!!

carrieandr · June 2015

It sounds like good news! I hope you get a darker line next time you test!

thistle8677 · June 2015

Excited for you!!!!!! :-bd

Carazona5 · June 2015

I've been reading this thread and now I can't wait to see what happens tomorrow! Lol

Tomerine · June 2015

Thanks for the support, ladies! My emotions are all over the place. I've convinced myself a dozen times that I must be pregnant, and equally that I must not be. You know what Tom Petty says... The wait is the hardest part.

(thank goodness it's a 35+ board or I'd be worried no one would get that!)

emsmama15 · June 2015

Oh my goodness @Tomerine - a line is a line. Test again tomorrow and let us know ASAP!

HAHA! So exciting! We need some BFPs around this place!

thistle8677 · June 2015

Yes! A line is a line! Let's get some BFP's up in here!

Tomerine · June 2015

14 dpo and still no AF (FF has me due today) but this spotting has me worried. Just a tiny bit again this am. I have to go get more sticks on which to pee, but am afraid. Maybe the line is real but its faintness and the spotting mean it's not going to stick. And maybe I'd rather think it was nothing? I keep going to the bathroom. If it's not going to happen I just really want a glass of wine. Yes, at 10 am. Thanks for being patient with me as I sort out my own anxiousness. Sigh.

jilligan14 · June 2015

Is the spotting like your usual AF spotting or is it still acting a little different? I know this limbo land is the worse place to be. I'll continue to keep my fingers crossed for you!!!

Tomerine · June 2015

@jilligan14 , it's not. It's darker now than it was but its otherwise not progressing. I usually need a panty liner, at least, by now. This is just noticeable when I pee, and not even every time.

Going out this afternoon and will get more tests then. Only way to know for sure. I'll post again after I've tested. Thanks again for going along on this ride with me!

thistle8677 · June 2015

@Tomerine everything crossed for you!!!! >:D<

emsmama15 · June 2015

@Tomerine - GOOD LUCK!! I hope this is your month!!

Tomerine · June 2015

I did 2 digital tests. Both came up errors. What in the heck?!

Knottie16743552 · June 2015

That's called Murphy's Law. I'm still holding out for ya!!! Good luck!

jilligan14 · June 2015

How frustrating!! Those tests aren't cheap either. I don't know which test method you use but I find it easier to do the dip in a cup method...I got one error once and switched to the cup method and never had an error again. Maybe try again in the morning (if you have any tests left!). How is the spotting going?

thistle8677 · June 2015

@Tomerine omg! Wth?!!! That's total crap!

Carazona5 · June 2015

I feel like I just watched a season ending cliffhanger of some show.

emsmama15 · June 2015

OMG @Tomerine! WTH? I agree with @jilligan14, definitely dip the stick. I've only gotten an error once and it was when I tried to pee on the actual stick. I don't have great aim...

Tomerine · June 2015

Sorry for the cliffhanger @Carazona5 but it's over now. I went out and got more tests. Not pregnant. And the kicker is that the spotting has increased since then. I'm relieved to know but really disappointed.

@jilligan14 and @emsmama15 , thank you for the cup tip. That's what I did this time, with the regular line ones.

Don't know what to think. There was def some sort of line- looking at the unused test confirmed that. Wondering if there had been something that just didn't last. :-<

Clomid next cycle. A friend is on it and she mentioned that stress can lower your progesterone? There has been a lot of stress lately- family health issues and 2 significant deaths.

Fingers crossed for next time. And for all of you. Thanks again for riding the roller coaster with me.

thistle8677 · June 2015

@Tomerine I'm so sorry

What a huge let down.
I'm waiting for AF myself. Got a tiny bit of ewcm with pink tint which is usually how AF starts for me.

jilligan14 · June 2015

Oh no!!! That's not how I wanted the cliffhanger to end! Boo. Sometimes there are short little chemical pregnancies that last only a couple of days but don't stick. But usually the hormone doesn't disappear that quickly, so who knows. Sorry you have to deal with the disappointment. Fingers crossed for your next cycle!

Carazona5 · June 2015

Aww I'm sorry

dolphin012 · June 2015

Oh shoot. Too much AF this week! Boo!

carrieandr · June 2015

Argh. So sorry, ladies. Stupid AF.

Tomerine · June 2015

I hope none of you get a whole boxful of errors like I did, but if you do, I just got a refund from First Response. They were really nice about it too!

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