TTC After a Loss
GhanimaAtreides
member
Who has ignored the waiting period?
GhanimaAtreides
member
No flames. Both the 2 weeks pelvic rest to prevent infection and the # of normal periods after to try again?
My sex drive is starting to return, but my body (still experiencing cervical pain any time there is pressure from a full bladder, gas, or BM) and my mind (horny) are still firmly not in agreement. My temps are finally dropping from the 99.4 range, but I can tell when DH is kissing the sides of my neck that my lymph nodes are chock full and super tender. It's been only 5 days since the D&C. I was thinking that provided my temp stays down/keeps going down, my cervical pain is gone, and my lymph nodes feel clear for 48hrs that it might be ok to resume sex/TTC if it happens prior to the two week mark?
I was surprised by how many charts on Fertility Friend showed women having sex within a week of miscarrying. Should I assume those weren't D&Cs? Do those who experienced natural miscarriages get told to wait two weeks to prevent infection too?
I'm planning on taking a series of dollar-store HPTs and OPKs so that at least if there's still a BFP line, I would be able to show the doc when it started progressively getting darker. Yes, I can see how some would think that's assuming a lot, but I've always been the one who gets pregnant the first month trying.
My sex drive is starting to return, but my body (still experiencing cervical pain any time there is pressure from a full bladder, gas, or BM) and my mind (horny) are still firmly not in agreement. My temps are finally dropping from the 99.4 range, but I can tell when DH is kissing the sides of my neck that my lymph nodes are chock full and super tender. It's been only 5 days since the D&C. I was thinking that provided my temp stays down/keeps going down, my cervical pain is gone, and my lymph nodes feel clear for 48hrs that it might be ok to resume sex/TTC if it happens prior to the two week mark?
I was surprised by how many charts on Fertility Friend showed women having sex within a week of miscarrying. Should I assume those weren't D&Cs? Do those who experienced natural miscarriages get told to wait two weeks to prevent infection too?
I'm planning on taking a series of dollar-store HPTs and OPKs so that at least if there's still a BFP line, I would be able to show the doc when it started progressively getting darker. Yes, I can see how some would think that's assuming a lot, but I've always been the one who gets pregnant the first month trying.
Re: Who has ignored the waiting period?
My doctor said the reason you should wait for one cycle is to make dating the pregnancy easier. The wait three cycles rule is to make sure you are more emotionally ready to carry another child.
I'm hoping with the monitoring dating the next one shouldn't be an issue even if it takes longer to ovulate... $-store HPTs to monitor a clear drop if not to negative, then a possible rise, plus BBT charting, $-store OPKs, and CM... the only thing I'm not going to do this month is monitor CP, not crazy about unnecessary poking. Plus I had a hard enough time getting progesterone as far up as it needed to go. I'm sure DH can be gentle and he's pretty good about when we need to call it quits even if we've already started, like on days when my CP is too low and it's painful (24hrs post-O, usually).
I'm kinda relieved to see so many who have no issues getting right back to it. Emotionally, I don't feel like I need a break from TTC to mourn, I had a whole month of spotting before the D&C to do that. I think having to abide by some waiting period for the sole convenience of fitting some doc's EDD wheel calculator would just be unnecessarily frustrating. Plus after the traumatic experience of hemorrhaging, I think dealing with even a regular period at this point would stir up unpleasantness. The sooner I can take 9 months off, the better.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
I know it is so tempting, when you look at FF and see that so many people didn't wait. After a loss, the need to get pregnant again can be overwhelming, as can the need to return to intimacy with our partners. However, the advice your doctor gave you is absolutely valid and is designed with one thing in mind. To keep you healthy and fertile.
The issue with looking at FF data is that you don't get to see how many of those people when on to have uterine infections. The cervix is forced wide open during a D&C and even after you stop bleeding, the cervix may still be partially open. It certainly might not have the normal cervical mucus that prevents bacteria from passing into the uterus. This also goes for non-surgical losses as well, although this kind of complication certainly is more likely after a D&C.
Remember that your doctor has your best interests at heart and is giving advice based on your individual case and their education, training, and experience in practice. They are not just being arbitrarily or overly-cautious, and they certainly aren't telling you to wait in order to be mean. please listen to your doctor. Unless you are in your 40s, the brutal truth is that waiting the advised time is not going to impact your ability to have the family your imagine for yourself, but not waiting could.
All advice given based on lengthy personal experience.
I am not a doctor, I just have a working medical vocabulary.
Always available to answer questions about loss, infertility, and TRP.
