October 2015 Moms

Primarily work with men

I work in a lab for an ethanol industry. On the plant side there is me and one other woman. We get along great and I will admit, can be just as crude as the guys sometimes. I'm not offended easily but now that I'm pregnant they seem to think I am incapable. Or the comments about things they have no clue about suddenly bother me. What set me off today was my name was not on the list for our annual golf outing and when I asked why I was told "you're pregnant so I just figured you couldn't". All these assumptions drive me crazy! I'm pregnant, not handicapped. I know my limits but I'm not a fragile flower. But then if I say something I get called out for raging hormones! My sanity is frazzled! Sorry for the long rant, but the combo between hormones and guys aren't meshing well. What will they do if I just start crying one day?! Anyone else struggle with this?

Re: Primarily work with men

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  • I'd say brush it off as best you can. They're men...They're not going to understand, especially if they've never been around a pregnant woman. I don't think all of it comes from a bad place, but more so maybe wanting to look out for you? On the other hand though I work with some men that are just insensitive assholes about pregnancy and literally roll their eyes if they overhear any baby talk. I'm sorry they left you out of golfing though. Show up anyway and beat every last one of them! ;)
  • I work at a water treatment plant. I am literally the only woman there with all men in their 50s-60s. Most of them just leave me alone to do my own thing, I think they're scared to say the wrong thing. But my boss has asked me several times when I plan on quitting to stay home and take care of the baby.. Umm I haven't made that decision yet so leave me alone!
  • Most aren't too terrible. I've been there almost 5 years and I work in my hometown so I knew a few of them from way back. They all give me crap all the time so I throw it right back but heaven forbid I had a bad day. Even so I'm just quiet, not mean or emotional. The worst one is our ops manager and his wife just had a baby. Maybe I will remind him of how mad his wife got at him but since I don't live with him i have no problem smacking him LOL.
  • If this makes you feel any better, we have an annual golf fundraiser and I am on a team with three other women. One of the women is my good friend and we've gone through two pregnancies at almost the same time. She just had her child, and I'm obviously due this fall. She assumed that I wasn't going to golf this year because I'm pregnant, and I corrected her and told her that if my belly gets in the way, I'll find a substitute! :) With regard to other comments, I totally understand your frustration. When I was pregnant with DD, even my own husband would say things that bothered me because he clearly did not understand what I was experiencing! You can just come right over her to TB and vent about it, and then hopefully keep your cool when you're at work :)
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  • Ummm... Some of this sounds like legitimate discrimination.
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  • casserole27casserole27 member
    edited June 2015
    I find this interesting because the few women at my work are so much worse than the men. The women tend to act like know-it-alls and are really condescending. The men at work are amazing and not afraid to admit they don't know what I am going through and accept however I happen to be at the moment. For the most part they treat me like normal, aside from carrying heavy things for me more but thats it. This may be because I am better friends with the guys at work though and a lot of them are daddies.
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  • Yes, I work in flight test and people are so awkward around me. I used to get invited to things but now I don't exist. I also go weeks without assignments. I used to be a go-to person but now I just sit at my desk. I've asked for assignments and they're "coming". I have 13 patents, my undergrad and master in mechanical engineering but now I'm apparently an idiot. I feel the same as you.
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