In the delievery room

jilladelario · June 2015

Yesterday my mother asked me if her best friend could be in the delivery room this time. Apparently because my mom was there when she gave birth to her son 30 years ago she wants to come up for my birth.

It's not super weird since I've known this woman my entire life and I'm closer to her than any of my aunts, but her reasoning was hilarious to me.

I told her I didn't care - my husband will still be in bootcamp so it was only going to be my mother there with me and honestly I think she could use the support. My mom was there for my my first daughters birth and it really freaked her out despite the fact that she has 4 kids.

Anyone else gotten weird requests like this? What did you say in the end?

mrsb30 · June 2015

My mil asked to be in, to which I said no. She was upset, but my own mom won't be in there. I just don't want anybody besides DH.

LilLee11 · June 2015

My MIL has asked me w every child we've had bc she was in the room for one of her grandkids. We have said no. Honestly, I don't care if my whole neighborhood wants to come but my husband has said "if they weren't there to make the child, they don't need to be in the room when it's born." There are also emergency situations that can happen and having too many cooks in the kitchen can just be a bad thing. I don't know why people aren't satisfied w sitting down the hallway while a mom gives birth. Let the mom and dad meet their new baby and start their life as a family, even if it's just for the first 15 minutes!

breezymeema7 · June 2015

I am, again, blown away by people asking to be in the delivery room. This is so weird to me. No one has ever asked me to be in the delivery room, ever. Honestly, sometimes even H being there annoys me

love4yourlocks · June 2015

I think it's all personal preference. I will have absolutely no one in the room except DH and me but I've been in the room for both my cousins kids and she had her parents and SO also. Some people love the support, I hate people seeing me in pain.

mrsb30 · June 2015

breezymeema7 said:
I am, again, blown away by people asking to be in the delivery room. This is so weird to me. No one has ever asked me to be in the delivery room, ever. Honestly, sometimes even H being there annoys me

I think it's wierd too! I was shocked when my mil asked me and then even more shocked when she was upset that I said no. Maybe it's because I laughed and repeated the question, thinking she must be joking.

CaliforniaDream87 · June 2015

Nope.

Honestly, birth has become the new "puppet show" it seems. It's so strange that people *want* to be in the room. I've never wanted to witness someone's birth.

bpwife&mama · June 2015

Only me and hubby will be allowed. No.one.else.

puccagirl77 · June 2015

I think it is great that you jave another person who you feel will bring you comfort and support. And your Mom's logic is pretty funny.

mjones0721 · June 2015

I've had everyone from my sister to my MIL ask to be in the room before. I think it's so stupid when they get mad at me for saying no. They always are like but it's my grandson/nephew/whatever and I just say yea and it's my son and my body that will be on display and there are very few people I'm comfortable with having see my body like that

babyyyy3 · June 2015

MIL asked if she could be in the room and I nearly ripped her head off. SO is the only one who needs to be in there with me.. I'm extremely easily distracted and flustered so it's best if he's the only one there while my entire body and lady bits are open for examination!! I want our son to know mom and dad before grandpa grandma friend friend oh pass the baby to friends boyfriend because every one is so excited... For SO first two babies he had quite the crowd outside.. I'm not all for that at all!!! SO, and his babies and his parents is plenty for me for the first few hours because I myself may just be infatuated with my first born and maybe I'll just want to stare at him and feel what it feels like to BF him.

emmacake08 · June 2015

I just covered this with my doula. My feelings were if my mom wants to come in and see me, check on me in early stages of labor, I'm okay with that. Once I'm down to business, I don't want anyone else around. I think it would be distracting and I don't think DH would appreciate it either...

pabeybaby · June 2015

My mom thought she was going to be in the room with me but I told her no. She would stress me out and piss me off. Only hubby and a birth photographer are allowed in the room with me. I know a birth photographer sounds weird to some, but my SIL had it done and they're not tacky or weird at all, they're amazing pictures. Nothing invasive or too graphic, everything was done professionally and tastefully. I would love to have my own

awebsteWed218778 · June 2015

breezymeema7 said:

I am, again, blown away by people asking to be in the delivery room. This is so weird to me. No one has ever asked me to be in the delivery room, ever. Honestly, sometimes even H being there annoys me

Agree! It is incredibly weird to me too, and I am shocked that people would have the nerve to ask such a thing?! No one in my family or circle of friends has even broached the subject, and I don't think they ever would on their own accord. But now that I've said this, watch it happen this weekend when the IL are over! LOL

@emmacake08 - Agree with you too - if I feel like I want or need my mom there during the early stages for support, I would ask her to do so and I am sure she would - but it would be at my request, and as soon as things start to get real it will only be DH and I - he will be scarred enough from the experience I am sure.

ChanelLovesB · June 2015

It'll just be me and DH! Funny thing is my mom is legit mad at me for this and said I'm "taking away a day she will never get to witness again" *facepalm* Lady Chill!

mrsb30 · June 2015

pabeybaby said:
My mom thought she was going to be in the room with me but I told her no. She would stress me out and piss me off. Only hubby and a birth photographer are allowed in the room with me. I know a birth photographer sounds weird to some, but my SIL had it done and they're not tacky or weird at all, they're amazing pictures. Nothing invasive or too graphic, everything was done professionally and tastefully. I would love to have my own

Doesn't sound wierd at all! I'm a photographer and would love to have a birth photographer...unfortunately it's not in the budget right now.

LittleFox2015 · June 2015

Glad I'm not the only one who wants some alone time as a new family. Dh took care of the IL side and they were pretty understanding. Said they would be fine as long as we didn't have my entire family down first or something. Totally understandable. My own mother however, informed me that telling her we are having the child and expecting her to wait until we were home and ready to recieve guests was not going to happen... so we just won't tell anyone until we are ready to receive guests. Problem solved. Crazy how some think it is their "right" to be involved.

jorstad1 · June 2015

Couldn't you barter with someone

april42007 · June 2015

No one has asked because I have been vocal since the day we told family that not only will no one in the room but DH but we also will not be accepting visitors while I labor. My goal is a med free birth and I've told them I don't need any distractions. Plus I don't want them there. It's not a show I'm selling ring side seats to.

wmellis · June 2015

I think this is so weird too! My MIL asked and I politely (and firmly) declined. Only my husband is allowed with me. Other than that, you'll need a medical degree and/or a hospital employee badge to get to me!

johannaspisak · June 2015

I had a friend request that I was there years ago, mainly to control her SO at the time (he had a tendency for drama). I can't imagine asking to be there though. Seems invasive and presumptuous to even request.

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