is it wrong to want a c-section?

eule1991 · June 2015

Hi, I'm a first time mom and sometimes I really wish to have a c-section. Other times I think I should at least try to give birth the natural way.
My brothers baby was 10 pounds 11 ounces and the doctor already said my baby is too big too.
I'm scared to give birth but I also don't want the longer recovery from the c-section.
What are your thoughts?

Growingapepper · June 2015

Wrong, no. It's your body. But if it's unnecessary why would you want to have major surgery when you have a body designed to give birth without cutting and drugs?

eule1991 · June 2015

You are definitely right. I'm just scared to give birth I think. Now that the due date is coming closer.

BabyBugutsky · June 2015

Talk to your doctor about your concerns. They will be able to help you create a birth plan you are comfortable with.

If you go natural you can get the epidural which with ease pain but could slow down the labor process. Does your hospital have the option to do a water birth? I've heard water births are slightly more relaxing and calming. I'm actually talking to my OB about it today.

I don't think it's wrong at all to just want a c section. A girl I knew had always planned a c-section from the very beginning of her pregnancy three years ago. She was only in the hospital recovering for 3 days and then was pretty ok after. Obviously she had to take it easy but you have to even with a natural birth.

Do what you feel the most comfortable with and definitely discuss it with your doctor.

kalina27 · June 2015

I feel the same way. I'm a FTM too and have these thoughts daily. I think in the end I'll try giving birth naturally because of the recovery time difference. Who knows! You may have a super easy delivery if you do it naturally. My friend just gave birth 2 weeks ago and she really wanted a c-section but got an epidural and did it naturally and she had the best experience. You never know. But I understand how you feel! I'm right there with you!

eule1991 · June 2015

I think that's how I end up doing it too. Naturally. But the thought if a c-section is always in my head.

adtaylor2015 · June 2015

Please tell me you do not have the option to have a c section simply because you want one? Aside from the longer recovery time, there are risks associated with c sections. I would never elect to have one just because, only if it was necessary for the health of myself and/or baby.

bcamasosa · June 2015

i cannot say that it is wrong because it is your body, don't let anybody tell you what's right and wrong for you! Although, I suggest you research first so that you can make informed decisions.

These affirmations are very helpful to me, I hope you find them helpful too

“Giving birth should be your greatest achievement not your greatest fear.” ~ Jane Weideman

“When you change the way you view birth, the way you birth will change.” ~Marie Mongan

‎”If I don’t know my options, I don’t have any.” ~ Diana Korte

“There is a secret in our culture, and it’s not that birth is painful. It’s that women are strong.” ~ Laura Stavoe Harm

“Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. “~Marie Curie

“The power and intensity of your contractions cannot be stronger than you, because it is you.” ~ Unknown

‎”Rain, after all is only rain; it is not bad weather. So also, pain is only pain; unless we resist it, then it becomes torment.” ~ the I Ching

sphillips18 · June 2015

I actually talked to a nurse about this out of curiosity. They typically don't give you a c section just because you want one. You'll heal much easier with natural birth anyway. I'm a FTM too and scared of giving birth. I'm also scared of the epidural, anxiety & numbness is key to a panic attack for me. What I have in mind is that I want to try natural birth as best as I can without the epidural and if I end up deciding to get it then I will.

WDDCH · June 2015

Cesarean birth should be done out of necessity. Vaginal birth was designed to be most beneficial to baby by gently squeezing them as they come through the birth canal, helping them excrete the fluid in their lungs. Some doctors do more gentle cesareans now where they slowly pull baby out, mimicking the birth canal, but not all do.

Thank God we do have the technology and know-how for necessary cesarean birth because it can and does save lives. But I personally wouldn't sign up if it wasn't to save one or both of our lives.

Regardless of how you give birth there is going to be discomfort. I'd rather the pain of labor than the recovery of surgery when I have a newborn to care for and nurse.

Do I judge you or anyone who would rather skip to the OR? Nope. That's up to you and is your choice. I respect that we all have a choice. I only urge you to make an informed choice, not a fear-based choice.

eule1991 · June 2015

I asked my doctor today and he said I can get a c-section.
But on Monday I'm started my birth classes and hopefully the fear of giving birth goes down.

WDDCH · June 2015

eule1991 said:
I asked my doctor today and he said I can get a c-section.
But on Monday I'm started my birth classes and hopefully the fear of giving birth goes down.

Enjoy your classes and don't be afraid to ask questions!

momofsweetps · June 2015

I think the notion that c-section is easier during labor is so false. I watched my cousin struggle worse in the hospital after her 3 sections than I did with my 5 vaginal births. The recovery is longer, you can't pick up your kids, you can't drive. It's just too many limitations.

Labor is scary but it's actually a lot better than the chance of them messing up or you body not doing well during a major surgery.

Now I'm talking about choosing a section for the soul purpose of scheduling it or avoiding labor. I'm all for sections for medical reasons and never would judge someone for having to have one.

nickc2cute · June 2015

I had a c-section with my first and I wouldn't wish that pain on anyone. I was envious of women strolling through the hospital halls after birth while I had to be on heavy narcotics to get out of bed. They used too much fluid in my c-section and I spent over a week in the hospital alone while my baby was home with my mom.
I'm having another this time because my doctor is recommending it but otherwise I would vbac.

junebaby20 · June 2015

Please always do what you want and what's best for you and baby. Do not let anyone make you feel less for for what you want and what actually happens. Yes the female body was made for birth. But sometimes it just doesn't work that way. I have narrow hips and my daughter has a huge head. 3 years later and it's still massive. Choosing to have a csection was the best option and my recovery was a breeze. Nursed great, walking around the next day etc. get all the information. Plan for a vaginal birth but also know everything that could happen. She was breach at 35 weeks and she finally flipped but was estimated to be over 10. We talked about it And spoke with all the doctors in the practice and they left it up to us. I knew myself well enough to know I did not want to labor for hours just to get wheeled back. I think my frame of mind made all the difference in my recovery. It's a major surgery and it's not very romantic. It's very robotic and sterol. But you can make the best out of it. Vaginal or surgical, no one is going to give you a cookie and a star on your chart. How they come out will not make or break your ability to be a good mom. I'm having a repeat and gasp scheduling it to fit in my husbands schedule and when my mom can fly in.

KERJF · June 2015

I think it is silly to want potentially unnecessary major surgery. And I wouldnt trust a Dr about weight at this point either, personally.

adtaylor2015 · June 2015

I don't mean to sound rude but I would seriously side eye any doctor who allowed women to have elective c sections that aren't medically necessary and are only because the woman doesn't want to give birth naturally. That speaks volumes about the doctor in my opinion.

jennalynn0 · June 2015

I ended up having a c-section because my son had a big head and was not decending. It was good and I had an easy recovery. This time around I have no choice but to have another c section because it has been less than 2 years. I am sad about this because I wanted to experience watching the baby come out and be flopped on my chest immediately. After my c section my hubby got to show off baby as I was finished up in the op room. I saw my sisters labor and it was amazing!!!

als8711 · June 2015

It's not wrong, but I've had a c section, not by choice, and would give anything to have been able to have a vaginal birth. C sections are NOT easy, they aren't easier than vaginal births and they come with a lot of extra complications and pain. They also limit you on the number of kids you can have, which is what kills me. I have friends who had so much pain for months that they couldn't hold their own baby Bc of nerve damage, another had spinal issues because of the spinal they do, some are in pain for months and others like me recover pretty quickly. But you just never know. It's a major surgery and can make taking care of a newborn very difficult. If you end up needing one then obviously that's the best option but if ou can avoid it I definitely would.

is it wrong to want a c-section?

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