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October 2015 Moms
aliguertin
member
Is feeling unattractive and overly sensitive a prevalent part of pregnancy?
aliguertin
member
I am 21 weeks pregnant and this past week I've been in a roller coaster of emotions mainly stemming seemingly from feeling unattractive. I've considered myself an active girl with some curves. Since being pregnant I don't feel like it's a cute belly like I see many women have..I feel wide and I feel like people give me questionable "is she pregnant" looks.. Could be in my head! We attended a wedding and my husband danced with a family friend because she was feeling down and out about being newly single. His mother was taking pictures of them and it absolutely infuriated me. I'm feeling irrational and on the verge of tears all the time. Passing emotions or are my crazy emotions here to stay until my hormones rebalance? I'm getting annoyed with myself! Ha
Re: Is feeling unattractive and overly sensitive a prevalent part of pregnancy?
What I have found that helps is making a point to fix my hair and put on make-up and put on the cutest clothes I have whenever possible. I don't feel cute at all when it's 100 degrees and I'm sweating in my unflattering maternity clothes, but I try.
But you know what I find helps even more? Get a mani-pedi, buy some new make-up, get your hair color refreshed or a haircut (though this isn't the time for a drastic change). But a new piece of jewelry. Anything that doesn't depend on you being a certain size.
We are all halfway there though! And as a FTM I can't guarantee it's worth it but I think all the STMs can
You are not alone! Hang in there
Some stuff that makes me feel better on a daily - I always try to do my make up and hair. I actually just got a new hair style and that has made me feel a lot more attractive lately. At first I was trying to squish my body into my pre preggo clothes because I thought it would make me feel smaller but the discomfort all day just made me feel huge! Get some cute maternity clothes!! Jessica Simpson has a great line and so does Pink Blush - it is definitely styles I would have worn pre preggo but built for comfort. When I am comfortable in what I am wearing it much easier for me to feel cute.
And when all else fails remind yourself that the chunkiness and awkwardness that your body is going through is ultimately beautiful because you are growing your baby and as we all know that is no easy task
Our culture is very severe on us women. Not only do celebrities on magazine covers have access to tons of resources and time to look the way they do, they are very often airbrushed and edited to even more unrealistic levels. It is sad the outside is emphasized over the inside, and that perhaps many who feel they actually have met the standard are the ones so wrapped up in appearance that they are vain. I think most of us are more beautiful than we will let ourselves believe. The lie is we have to meet certain standards of beauty in order to be beautiful.
I actually had the hardest time so far with body image when I was in my first trimester. I had no bump yet but was pretty bloated. I did not announce the pregnancy until I was about 16 weeks, so until then I was worried people would see the bloat and bigger boobs and just think I got fat. For me it has been so much easier now that I have a distinct bump, because now I and others know my body shape is because of baby.
You may feel unattractive. But I encourage you to not let those thoughts repeat in your head and taunt you. Even if it does look like some of us have gained a bit all over and not just a bump, it is for a good reason - to physically support our pregnancies and babies. Most people think pregnant women look wonderful! They are so much kinder on us than we are ourselves. The pregnancy shape does not render us ugly! Even if we gain more than we want, the truest thing about us is not that we are overweight. It is that we and our bodies are juggling a LOT and we still are beautiful!
My DH thinks I look good and doesn't understand my insecurity. So sweet of him...
My solution- I buy flattering clothes, take time doing my hair, wear make-up and jewelry. It helps. I still compare myself to those other pregnant ladies who are super fit with a round bump, but I can never match up, so at least I do the best with what I have.
Next time I will eat a bit better and exercise from the beginning. I pretty much let loose because I was in between apartments and I had no routine and a lot of stress. Now it's too late to lose weight or do anything vigourous. I power walk and do yoga about 4 times a week. At least it's something.
When I'm around my husband's pregnant cousin, I just feel fat though. Her bump is so nice. It's perfectly rounded out and she looks so beautiful just holding her belly. And then I look at and feel mine, I feel all the imperfections in it. The spots towards the bottoms of my belly that feel like my normal chubby belly.
My pregnant cousin makes me feel better, though. I saw her bare belly recently and it just looked like a bloated version of her regular belly, similar to mine. When she's got it covered, it looks like a perfect little bump though.
Seeing myself naked lately is weird.
That's exactly what I did! Makeup shopping got me out if the pregnancy body blues! I was feeling so down and close to tears over my new body for a while. It doesn't help that my skinny best friend doesn't get that it's a real feeling/thing for me regarding the changes I'm going through and she keeps making annoying stupid jokes about "do you remember when you were once skinny and had a flat tummy and a tiny waist and bla bla? Hehehe". X( I just want to go off and give her a piece of my mind because I am struggling with the body changes and I am so NOT in the mood for stupid insensitive jokes like that especially from someone who should know better. I digress though lol. I decided to go makeup shopping and my God did I feel better lol. I'm normally a makeup addict/blogger so it made sense to just go makeup shopping since it has nothing to do with size. Felt good to slather the new makeup on too even though I just washed it right after since I really wasn't going anywhere lol.