Community› The Bump Month Clubs› September 2015 Moms
September 2015 Moms
New Discussion

Job Harassment...trying to make me quit!

ken226ken226 member
edited June 2015 in September 2015 Moms
My last post was about how my manager kept bothering me about my dress code for no reason but maybe because I was interviewed at 5 months pregnant and I didn't tell them until i was around 6 1/2 months. Ever since then my manager has been on a roll. One day my sleaves aren't thick enough, next day my dress is too long, third day she leaves the branch to get safety pins because my cleavage is showing. So I called HR last Friday to just let them know I wanted it to stop and also I wanted her to acknowledge my doctors notes. I given her two that said I was unable to be on my feet for 30 mins...I'm a personal banker and because we're short staffed I also do teller work. Today HR finally calls me and brings up how I never gave them a work excuse for one of my doctors appointments (but I gave them a drs note...wouldn't that be the same thing) and also how I left 15mins early for another appointment I never let them know through email (although i told my manager verbally that morning) but I did have an work excuse. Petty stuff but no one could say anything about my work performance. The woman was very rude and I told her that she was upsetting me and that if she continues to be rude I will quit. The woman then puts my regional manager on the line and I explain what is going on and he ignored it and said ms. J**** are you verbally saying that you want to quit. I told him no but I'm willing to put in my two weeks notice if this harassment doesn't stop. He then tells me before I leave the office to send a letter of resignation. I hung up and I never sent the email but when I exited the office I was asked for my keys and to audit my drawer. Not by my manager but an associate. I never signed anything or faxed anything. Once I left the office I went to the ER and was told I was having braxton hicks and that my blood pressure was really high. The nurses were upset and gave me a note to give to my job tomorrow. My question is if I never sent the letter for a two weeks notice do I still have my job? How should I handle this?
Report Reply to Post

Re: Job Harassment...trying to make me quit!

  • mriandabustomriandabusto member
    Unless they fired you yes you still have your job. You did not say you quit or let anyone know that you would not be going into work tomorrow so there is no excuse not to go other than the doctors note.
    Unless you actually do want to stop working I think you should just keep on going as things are and hope for the best, but if they don't get any better try to talk to someone higher up than the regional manager about the disrespect you've been receiving.
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • chelseajeanenechelseajeanene member
    That's a really sticky situation. It sounds like they were forcing to you to say the words "I quit" and you never did but they're thinking you quit anyway. I was in a similar situation and was forced to quit my job when I was only 4.5 months along. I can't tell you what to do but this is what I did. I left 3 weeks in a row crying and was forced to do things I wasn't allowed to do while pregnant and told my by my doctor not to do and my boss never cared, kept adding more stress on me and making up lies to make me cry and she would smile. She was forcing me to quit, which is how I felt at least. My husband finally gave me to okay to just end the stress and quit because we thought we'd end up losing our baby, because I already had stress related bleeding from his job. Anyway I decided to file for unemployment which I have never done in my life, but legally they are not allowed to deny you based on the fact you are pregnant. You will get 6 months of a paycheck and won't have to put yourself through the stress. It was the best decision I could have made for my body and child because I have had a difficult pregnancy since. Whatever you chose to do just know you have options and you don't have to stay and put yourself through hell if you don't want to
    Report Reply
  • shelbyddshelbydd member
    chelseajeanene said:

    That's a really sticky situation. It sounds like they were forcing to you to say the words "I quit" and you never did but they're thinking you quit anyway. I was in a similar situation and was forced to quit my job when I was only 4.5 months along. I can't tell you what to do but this is what I did. I left 3 weeks in a row crying and was forced to do things I wasn't allowed to do while pregnant and told my by my doctor not to do and my boss never cared, kept adding more stress on me and making up lies to make me cry and she would smile. She was forcing me to quit, which is how I felt at least. My husband finally gave me to okay to just end the stress and quit because we thought we'd end up losing our baby, because I already had stress related bleeding from his job. Anyway I decided to file for unemployment which I have never done in my life, but legally they are not allowed to deny you based on the fact you are pregnant. You will get 6 months of a paycheck and won't have to put yourself through the stress. It was the best decision I could have made for my body and child because I have had a difficult pregnancy since. Whatever you chose to do just know you have options and you don't have to stay and put yourself through hell if you don't want to

    Not telling you not to do this but just a heads up to be careful. Voluntarily quitting could cause you to be denied unemployment but beside that.. my best friend was fired from her job at 8 months pregnant.. basically because she was pregnant though of course they found other excuses for paperwork sake. She was initially denied unemployment. When she appealed that denial her doctor wrote her an excuse to send to unemployment basically stating she wasn't able to work due to her pregnancy thinking that would help her get approved if it showed she was willing but unable to perform her job duties. It really bit her in the butt. Unemployment denied her request because of the doctors note, stating basically that to be eligible for unemployment you have to be capable of working which the doctors note claimed she was not.
    image
    Report Reply
  • magdalena1977magdalena1977 member
    I am currently having a similar problem with my employer. I am an assistant manager for Goodwill aka "Greedwill" . Because I have a history of miscarriage my doctor has me on restriction from constant bending. They recently cut our available hours for our employees and insist that we still hit our production goals no matter what it takes. Because of a rodent problem I was asked to no longer assist with production. Last week I sent my cashier to assist with production since I was unable to help. We started our closing procedures late because I was only one on sales floor and unable to work recovery "picking merchandise off the floor", we got everything done except mopping the floor. A few days ago I was handed a writeup for leaving the store in an unsafe condition. I asked my manager am I suppose to get my production done or clean the store, she had no answer for me. Good luck, we have rights.
    Report Reply
  • chelseajeanenechelseajeanene member
    shelbydd said:

    chelseajeanene said:

    That's a really sticky situation. It sounds like they were forcing to you to say the words "I quit" and you never did but they're thinking you quit anyway. I was in a similar situation and was forced to quit my job when I was only 4.5 months along. I can't tell you what to do but this is what I did. I left 3 weeks in a row crying and was forced to do things I wasn't allowed to do while pregnant and told my by my doctor not to do and my boss never cared, kept adding more stress on me and making up lies to make me cry and she would smile. She was forcing me to quit, which is how I felt at least. My husband finally gave me to okay to just end the stress and quit because we thought we'd end up losing our baby, because I already had stress related bleeding from his job. Anyway I decided to file for unemployment which I have never done in my life, but legally they are not allowed to deny you based on the fact you are pregnant. You will get 6 months of a paycheck and won't have to put yourself through the stress. It was the best decision I could have made for my body and child because I have had a difficult pregnancy since. Whatever you chose to do just know you have options and you don't have to stay and put yourself through hell if you don't want to

    Not telling you not to do this but just a heads up to be careful. Voluntarily quitting could cause you to be denied unemployment but beside that.. my best friend was fired from her job at 8 months pregnant.. basically because she was pregnant though of course they found other excuses for paperwork sake. She was initially denied unemployment. When she appealed that denial her doctor wrote her an excuse to send to unemployment basically stating she wasn't able to work due to her pregnancy thinking that would help her get approved if it showed she was willing but unable to perform her job duties. It really bit her in the butt. Unemployment denied her request because of the doctors note, stating basically that to be eligible for unemployment you have to be capable of working which the doctors note claimed she was not.
    It's all based on the situation as to why you're not longer at the job. I was afraid I would get denied because I quit, but for the circumstances of why I quit and explaining my story I was approved immediately. She has a strong story and with doctors notes it shouldn't be a worry and for the fact she's informed RH will help validate it for her
    Report Reply
  • nickc2cutenickc2cute member
    I agree with the pp. show up for work and document all behaviors in writing. You need to be of the offense this morning.

    I used to work in employee relations and I can tell you that if you were one of our employees I would have a letter ready for you confirming out verbal conversation and your voluntary termination. Good luck!
    Report Reply
  • ken226ken226 member
    @peony1982 so I guess its okay to be harassed to the point where you almost go into preterm labor because youve been pressured all day at work to be on your feet longer than what your dr has requested and also getting verbal warnings in front of employees because my sleaves etc. I was asked by my manger a week ago why didnt i disclose to them that I was pregnant during the interview process. Was that appropriate??? No I'm not saying that it was mature to say if you don't stop being rude I will quit but if someone is basically backing you into a corner and belitting you every single effing day and your not only a FTM but a single woman supporting yourself wouldn't you want it to stop? Get off your high horse cause it could happen to you too! But no worries I already got a lawyer involved and filed for a complaint at the department of labor. Thanks
    Report Reply
  • nickc2cutenickc2cute member
    Make sure you put in writing that you are not resigning so that you can file for unemployment if need be.
    Report Reply
  • LaurenNewphLaurenNewph member
    nickc2cute said:

    Make sure you put in writing that you are not resigning so that you can file for unemployment if need be.

    This! No matter the job having stuff in writing can save your ass!
    Report Reply
  • Ivyblue92Ivyblue92 member
    I have to agree with @Peony1982 & @thinkpink101. Your attitude here says a lot about you. If this is how you are in a workplace then you shouldn't be working for the company you are with. As harsh as this is going to sound I don't understand why you took a job & kept your pregnancy from them, then as pp has said pulled the pregnancy card. You knew your job description, you knew what it involved so why go for the job?
    All that aside no one should be made to feel uncomfortable in their job. But I do believe there is more to this than your letting on.
    Report Reply
  • ebrosten33ebrosten33 member
    I hope for the best of U and hope u keep us posted! But to be honest with U pulling the quit part it may be recorded becuz the fact that it is a bank and U were talking to hr they probably record there conversations! So just a heads up on that
    Report Reply
  • rholbrook7rholbrook7 member
    This time, I have to agree with @Ivyblue92 @Peony1982 @thinkpink101 If the way you're treating people who are trying to figure out what exactly is going on, to try and help you better, is any indication of how you act at work, I'm not surprised how they're reacting to you. Honestly, being a manager myself, if an employee threatened me by saying they were going to quit, I would fire them. Because to me, that's someone who's not invested in their job. I don't know if you understand the severity of threatening to quit. As employers, we know there are so many more people out there who are desperate for jobs, and who we don't have to worry about them threatening to quit. I don't know what's going on behind the scenes. Maybe you're in the wrong, maybe you're in the right. I have no idea. However, there are better ways to deal with workplace harassment then threatening to quit. That's the one thing you DONT do.
    Report Reply
  • JenLovesDesignJenLovesDesign member
    It sounds to me like it's just not a situation that is working out.  Do you really want to work at a place that isn't your type?  Unfortunately, now is not the best time to be looking for a job, but it sounds to me when they asked for your keys that you were being fired.  If you started in May, they can terminate you for any reason because generally people are on probation for 3 months.  It just doesn't seem like a good fit.  
    Report Reply
  • shaunnar053shaunnar053 member
    JenLovesDesign said:
    It sounds to me like it's just not a situation that is working out.  Do you really want to work at a place that isn't your type?  Unfortunately, now is not the best time to be looking for a job, but it sounds to me when they asked for your keys that you were being fired.  If you started in May, they can terminate you for any reason because generally people are on probation for 3 months.  It just doesn't seem like a good fit.  
    This exactly. You really don't have any rights until after your probationary period. It SUCKS, but that's the way it is. I don't think there's anything wrong with you not telling your employers you were pregnant in your interview. It shouldn't, legally, have anything to do with whether or not they hire you, therefore there's no reason for you to disclose it. However, you shouldn't have accepted a job you knew you weren't going to be able to even do. That's very odd to me.. You shouldn't have threatened to quit, but what's done is done. I also was let go from my job the DAY I told them I was pregnant (however, I was an independent contractor with basically no rights, so I was screwed). I cried and was angry but I got over it eventually. It's a crappy situation all the way around, however, if I were you I'd leave the job and move on. It isn't worth the stress! Just chill and enjoy your third trimester and the time you'll have with baby.
    Report Reply
  • rachelkawesomerachelkawesome member
    I agree with a lot of what the PPs have said. 

    First, I don't think you always need to tell an employer that you are pregnant when you interview (I didn't when I was at 10 weeks), but if you knew the job required something you wouldn't be able to do, I think you should have disclosed it in that case. I don't think it's unfair to a company to start working and then take a pregnancy leave, but I do think it's unfair if you can't do the job they hired you for up until that leave. 

    Second, if your manager was baiting you by harassing you about your clothes when it's not in the dress code, you could have a) said "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't see that in the dress code. Can you show me the part that says that?" OR b) referred to the dress code and said "Actually, it says here skirts have to be however long and mine is longer" (or whatever). Next time, try to shut her down (politely) at that point rather than letting it get to you.

    Third, I can't think of a single situation where it helps you to threaten to quit a job. No employer is going to bend over backwards to keep you if you threaten to quit. You should never do that. Threatening of any kind (like if you threaten to get a lawyer) is pretty much going to get you fired sooner or later. 
    Report Reply
  • saybaby97saybaby97 member
    Just want to clarify re: Probationary Periods.  Yes, companies can let you go for almost any reason during a probationary period, IF they have a stated Probationary Period policy. Not all companies do.  However, even during this period, they can't terminate for unlawful reasons i.e race, gender, national origin, pregnancy...

    That being said, as an HR pro, I tend agree that there is more to this story.  You don't have to disclose pregnancy during an interview, but you do have to attest that you can complete the job requirements.  Some accommodations would be reasonable, as long as you are able to complete the essential job funIctions.  I'm not convinced OP was able to do so.  As far as the rest of it goes (dress code, leaving early, etc.) its hard to determine whether it qualifies as harassment or not without knowing what the dress code states and what their timekeeping policies are.  Sometimes what seems reasonable to most people, may still be against policy.
    Report Reply
  • amanda1ncamanda1nc member
    I live in a 'right to work' state.  This means you can be fired at anytime for any reason excluding discrimination of course.  In order to be eligible for unemployment you must have been employed for a year or longer.  

    You might want to check out the unemployment laws in your state and honestly, if the job is so stressful that you threatened to leave, you probably should go ahead and do it.  Most of the PP's are correct about the points that they have made.  Either way, if you are that unhappy why would you want to stay?  

    Report Reply
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"