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Going to my hospital class alone :(.

nakoppelnakoppel member
in August 2015 Moms
My hospital class is this Saturday (tomorrow) and I was actually really looking forward to it. I'm hoping it'll take a lot of the anxiety out of L&D. But now my husband has duty and can't go with me. I feel like I'm going to feel all lonely and awkward. I'm still going to go because I do think it's important. I'm just not looking forward to going alone. Anyone else have attend things like this specifically designed for couples by themselves. P.s I'm not blaming my husband I know it's not his fault it just bums me out. Also since we moved my 18 year old BIL here (see my previous post) we have had like zero time together and this would have been a nice bonding before baby moment.
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Re: Going to my hospital class alone :(.

  • SassetteSmurflingSassetteSmurfling member
    That stinks! My husband and I work opposite schedules so we both end up doing a lot of things with the kids by ourselves. I'm pretty sure everyone at preschool thinks I'm a single mom because DH can never make it to anything :(
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  • kelseyrayaykelseyrayay member
    I know how you feel! Duty ruins everything. My husband was a marine and he got it on thanksgiving one year. Of all the times to get it. I'm not sure if he can do this but see if he can switch duty with someone. That's what my DH did a few times.
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  • emmacake08emmacake08 member
    Yeah, when my DH was in the marines, I had to do a bunch of things by myself and it sucked. One time he actually made it to one of my IF appointments and I kept commenting on how weird it was to not be by myself. I hope the class goes well and maybe you guys could try to go out a few nights a week to have some space from BIL? You're so right that getting some time together before baby is a good idea.
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  • nakoppelnakoppel member
    kelseyrayay said:
    I know how you feel! Duty ruins everything. My husband was a marine and he got it on thanksgiving one year. Of all the times to get it. I'm not sure if he can do this but see if he can switch duty with someone. That's what my DH did a few times.

    This actually was a switch :-/ he was suppose to have it next week but he had to switch so he could take his TRS classes. So now he'll have it twice in one week in July. They are really light on NCOs right now because most of the unit is deployed or retiring so he is having to double up.
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  • nakoppelnakoppel member
    emmacake08 said:
    Yeah, when my DH was in the marines, I had to do a bunch of things by myself and it sucked. One time he actually made it to one of my IF appointments and I kept commenting on how weird it was to not be by myself. I hope the class goes well and maybe you guys could try to go out a few nights a week to have some space from BIL? You're so right that getting some time together before baby is a good idea.

    Yeah I'm used to doing many things on my own it just looked like for once he'd make it lol. Actually I've been lucky he's made it to 90% of my ultra sounds because of the kind of work he's doing right now it's been easy to duck out for an hour or so and then go back. They keep trying to send him away on training though :(. I've thought about suggesting a date night but I honestly feel bad about leaving my BIL alone. He doesn't really get out of the house much because he doesn't work. I know I should advocate for myself more but it's hard.
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  • kelseyrayaykelseyrayay member
    nakoppel said:


    kelseyrayay said:

    I know how you feel! Duty ruins everything. My husband was a marine and he got it on thanksgiving one year. Of all the times to get it. I'm not sure if he can do this but see if he can switch duty with someone. That's what my DH did a few times.



    This actually was a switch :-/ he was suppose to have it next week but he had to switch so he could take his TRS classes. So now he'll have it twice in one week in July. They are really light on NCOs right now because most of the unit is deployed or retiring so he is having to double up.


    Dang that sucks! :( I remember having to do a lot of things alone because DH was busy on duty or on a field op in the desert. Being a military wife sucks sometimes.
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  • nakoppelnakoppel member
    kelseyrayay said:
    kelseyrayay said:
    I know how you feel! Duty ruins everything. My husband was a marine and he got it on thanksgiving one year. Of all the times to get it. I'm not sure if he can do this but see if he can switch duty with someone. That's what my DH did a few times.

    This actually was a switch :-/ he was suppose to have it next week but he had to switch so he could take his TRS classes. So now he'll have it twice in one week in July. They are really light on NCOs right now because most of the unit is deployed or retiring so he is having to double up.
    Dang that sucks! :( I remember having to do a lot of things alone because DH was busy on duty or on a field op in the desert. Being a military wife sucks sometimes.

    TWICE they've tried to send him away on training OPs in July but since his job is a two man job and him and his SSgt are the only ones who can do it his SSgt keeps standing up for him. I just know once the deployed guys come back they'll send him away (which will be MUCH closer to my due date). He tells me I'm ridiculous but I know if it's not logical the marine corps will do it.
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  • Shine2015Shine2015 member
    Do you have another support person close by that cold go to the class with you?
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  • ptelfraptelfra member
    I'm also attending the birthing classes alone but only because my husband lives in the Dominican Republic (I live in Boston) but I would rather go alone than go with my sister or mom lol, that's just me. It is a bummer that DH can't be here for the classes or even the birth because the process of petitioning for citizenship takes up to a year :(( but as soon as we get the ok for baby boy to travel we are going to see his daddy! :x
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  • SaratiffSaratiff member
    @ptelfra I don't claim to know a lot about this but isn't there like a marriage visa or something he can come over with?
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  • Seed0824Seed0824 member
    When I attended the classes, there was a mix of couples and women by themselves because husbands had to work. It stinks but I think it's normal since so many people work weekends.
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  • alyciamrsalyciamrs member
    I went to an infant care class at the hospital by myself. Dear husband drives truck and works over 70 hours a week, all different times of day. I was the only one in the class who didn't have their partner with them. However, I never felt judged or out of place. It really seemed like a welcoming environment for all. I stressed like you and it ended up being okay. :)
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  • nakoppelnakoppel member
    Shine2015 said:
    Do you have another support person close by that cold go to the class with you?

    Unfortunately no due to my husband's duty station being in NC all our family is super far.
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  • ptelfraptelfra member
    @Saratiff once you're married you petition for residency because with visa it's only for a certain amount of time (2,5,10 years etc) and he can't be in the country for more than a couple months at a time. If we weren't married I could petition for a visa for him but once he's here in the country they give you up to 90 days to get married or he goes back. So either way you have to be/get married for residency. Also both processes take 8-12 months so it's kind of the same deal. But there's nothing that can be done for the process to be sped up just because I'm having our baby I was told by my lawyer, there would have to be a very very VERY serious emergency for something like that and sometimes not even that would change anything.
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