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Just want to cry...

thistle8677thistle8677 member
in TTC after 35
It's been a long few months and I'm just feeling really defeated right now.

Second cycle out from mmc @8wks (d&c)
I've been temping and using opk's Wondfo & digital
I've been sleeping like crap this week and by the time I started with the digital opk it went from O to peak the next day.
FF has me with dotted cross hairs having ovulated cd12. In past months previous to my most recent mc I ovulate cd16.
I know that my awful sleep patterns are to blame. And I know that it's "ok" to ovulate early, but it's not usual for me.

I can't figure out how the hell to share my chart. I'll work on that.
I just feel like crying. I just feel angry and overwhelmed and just so over it.

Sorry, needed to vent.

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Re: Just want to cry...

  • Carazona5Carazona5 member
    I'm so sorry :(. I hope something amazing happens for you soon and you can cry from happiness instead!
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  • thistle8677thistle8677 member
    @Carazona5 thank you so much xo
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  • thistle8677thistle8677 member
    [url=https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/45f318]My Ovulation Chart[/url]
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  • thistle8677thistle8677 member
    I don't know if that link even worked.
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  • GoldenKeysGoldenKeys admin
    edited June 2015
    I'm so sorry that you're feeling down... HUGS!

    You might need to click on the "Show Source" icon before pasting that url.  You can also paste the URL by using the 'insert pic' icon as well.


    Married for 7 years, TTC for 4 years
    dx:  Diminished Ovarian Reserve
    2 Clomid IUI's + 4 injectable IUI's= 5 BFNs and 1 mc




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  • suziq1978suziq1978 member
    I'm sorry you're feeling this way.  Wishing you good luck!
    <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/5677e2">My Ovulation Chart</a>
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  • carrieandrcarrieandr member
    I really wouldn't worry about ovulating on day 12 (although, like I said in my email, I still think day 13 could have been it, too). I don't even think day 12 is considered early. I got pregnant when I ovulated on day 10 -- that's considered early.
    TTC#1 since Jan 2015
    BFP 2/19/15  •  MMC found at 9 wks  •  D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
    BFP 8/29/15      •  CP (age 37)
    BFP 11/18/15  •  DD born at 41 weeks <3(age 37/38)

    TTC#2 since May 2017
    BFP 10/18/17  •  MMC found at 8 wks  •  Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
    BFP 2/16/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 4/13/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 5/07/18  •  MMC found at 10.5 wks  •  D&E at 11.5 wks      •  Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
    9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
    RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
    BFP 9/24/18  •      CP (age 40)
    BFP 5/11/19  •  Fraternal twins  •  MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w)  •  Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)













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  • carrieandrcarrieandr member
    And keep in mind, the first part of the cycle (follicular phase) is variable. It's the second part (luteal phase) that is supposed to be consistent.
    TTC#1 since Jan 2015
    BFP 2/19/15  •  MMC found at 9 wks  •  D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
    BFP 8/29/15      •  CP (age 37)
    BFP 11/18/15  •  DD born at 41 weeks <3(age 37/38)

    TTC#2 since May 2017
    BFP 10/18/17  •  MMC found at 8 wks  •  Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
    BFP 2/16/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 4/13/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 5/07/18  •  MMC found at 10.5 wks  •  D&E at 11.5 wks      •  Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
    9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
    RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
    BFP 9/24/18  •      CP (age 40)
    BFP 5/11/19  •  Fraternal twins  •  MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w)  •  Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)













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  • emsmama15emsmama15 member
    Gosh it must be an emotional week!  Hang in there @thistle8677!
    *** Child & current pregnancy mentioned ***
    Me - 41 (PCOS), Hubby - 43 (healthy)
    7/2013 - Sweet baby girl born (Clomid + TI)
    3/2014 - TTC #2, return to RE 7/2014
    12/2015: IVF #1 transferred two great looking embryos - BFP!
    First ultrasound: TWO beautiful little heartbeats!!
    Harmony: negative; level 2: babies look great and are boy/girl! :) 
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  • jilligan14jilligan14 member
    Hey, so I checked out your chart. Here's the proper link for anyone who wants to take a look as well:

    https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/45f318

    I actually think you ovulated on CD14. The reason I think this is because you still had EWCM, a positive OPK and your temp hadn't risen too drastically. Plus the temps could be thrown off a bit by your sleep patterns. It looks like CD 15 is a good, significant rise so I would count that as 1dpo. But that's just my opinion.

    Hang in there! It's a tough process but it looks like you had really good timing. Good luck!
    ME: 36 (PCOS), DH: excellent SA
    NTNP since 11/12, actively trying since 8/14
    m/c @ 7w (4/22/14), m/c @ 6w (11/19/14)
    11/15: Letrozole, Ovidrel, TI = BFP!!!
    Beta #1(14dpo)=349, Beta #2(18dpo)=2,805
    12/17/15: Got to see the heartbeat (105bpm)!
    1/25/16: NT scan = normal (HB=163bpm)
    EDD: 8/10/16 
    8/8/16: Baby boy born @ 12:25am, 8lbs, 20.5 inches
    5/18/17: BFP!!! (11dpo)
    Beta #1(12dpo)=176.4, Beta #2(15dpo)=607.1
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  • jilligan14jilligan14 member

    Oops, that one didn't work. Try this one:

    https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/45f318
    ME: 36 (PCOS), DH: excellent SA
    NTNP since 11/12, actively trying since 8/14
    m/c @ 7w (4/22/14), m/c @ 6w (11/19/14)
    11/15: Letrozole, Ovidrel, TI = BFP!!!
    Beta #1(14dpo)=349, Beta #2(18dpo)=2,805
    12/17/15: Got to see the heartbeat (105bpm)!
    1/25/16: NT scan = normal (HB=163bpm)
    EDD: 8/10/16 
    8/8/16: Baby boy born @ 12:25am, 8lbs, 20.5 inches
    5/18/17: BFP!!! (11dpo)
    Beta #1(12dpo)=176.4, Beta #2(15dpo)=607.1
    Report Reply
  • carrieandrcarrieandr member
    @thistle8677, I was actually wondering about cd14 after comparing your chart to the one you showed me from when you got pregnant. Maybe @jilligan14 is right.
    TTC#1 since Jan 2015
    BFP 2/19/15  •  MMC found at 9 wks  •  D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
    BFP 8/29/15      •  CP (age 37)
    BFP 11/18/15  •  DD born at 41 weeks <3(age 37/38)

    TTC#2 since May 2017
    BFP 10/18/17  •  MMC found at 8 wks  •  Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
    BFP 2/16/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 4/13/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 5/07/18  •  MMC found at 10.5 wks  •  D&E at 11.5 wks      •  Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
    9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
    RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
    BFP 9/24/18  •      CP (age 40)
    BFP 5/11/19  •  Fraternal twins  •  MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w)  •  Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)













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  • thistle8677thistle8677 member
    @jilligan14 & @carrieandroy Thank you so much, you are both making so much sense.  Look at me freaking out over a damn dotted line from FF!  Geez!  I'm so fragile right now, I hadn't even realized it! Carrie, I love your expertise overlay detective work :)

    @GoldenKeys & @suziq1978 I really appreciate the help with the links....

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  • Knottie16743552Knottie16743552 member
    Huuuuuuugs! This week's sucked. Hope the whirlwind calms for you. >:D<
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