Things to Ask (or demand) when delivering...

chavemann10 · June 2015

So, the cesarean posts have me thinking. For all of the first time mama's and even those who aren't, but are unsure of what to ask for (or demand) when delivering, what do you ladies recommend? I know there are things I've forgotten about (and times have changed in 11yrs), and this is baby #4. Let's see if we can help each other out...

chavemann10 · June 2015

For me, there are a few when it come to c-sections:

1. Ask for skin-to-skin immediately following birth, not all hospitals will do it, and not all doctors will do it, but it doesn't hurt to ask.

2. Demand your SO gets to go with the baby at all times while you are being sewn up.

3. I ask them not to feed the baby anything until I've had the chance to attempt to breastfeed, unless it is medically necessary.

4. I personally demand that I get to room in with baby at all times. All checks are done in my room with the exception of any that are absolutely necessary to be done in the nursery/NICU.

5. Always ask for extra pillows for your SO. Those hospital coach/bed things are NOT comfortable at all!

6. If you need it, submit a list of people who are NOT allowed in the hospital at the time of birth and require every visitor be checked against that list. ( I did this with my birth mother and her husband because they threatened to steal my first born...LONG STORY)

7. This is a personal choice...but I ask that all pacifiers only be given by me and not any nurses or at no time when the baby is out of my room. This is because I would prefer to attempt to breastfeed every time baby cries instead of having a nurse shove a paci in their mouth.

8. Demand to be able to walk as soon as you are able to. This includes taking a shower as well. I asked for everything to be taken out/off of me within the first 12hrs so that I could move freely around the hospital.

Alright ladies....what else am I forgetting??

toccoaparker · June 2015

Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that

chavemann10 · June 2015

toccoaparker said:

Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that

What about the eye gel? I know nothing about it, Please elaborate...

abbycjones · June 2015

A lot of these questions or demands can be talked about if you tour the L&D ward at the hospital where you plan to deliver. I'm a FTM and we toured L&D this week.
I'm delivering in a small, community hospital (they only have 3 delivery rooms and about 8 postpartum rooms). My midwife took us on the tour and explained their practices for uncomplicated deliveries. It was really helpful for me to know that a lot of my "demands" are common practice.

toccoaparker · June 2015

The eye gel is used during vaginal deliveries in case the mother has an STD, chlymidia (sp?) etc. it also interferes with vision so I am voting no and if you have a c-section I don't see any reason they should have for putting it on your baby:)

hclzmm14 · June 2015

I think in some states getting the gel is the law? You would have to check probably but I think I recall that when I looked into it last time.

J&D2007 · June 2015

If I may chime in on the 'eye gel'. I am an eye doctor and want to clarify what pp said. An eye ointment is given to every newborn, whether vaginal or cesarean for prophylactic treatment of conjunctivitis. Despite what you may see on Google, the ointment is to treat ANY form of conjunctivitis and is only erythromycin (very harmless). So, if baby is exposed to any type of bacteria going through the birth canal, whether it be staph or e. Coli (yep, there may be contact with poo and the vagina is full of healthy bacteria) it will prevent a serious infection that baby may not be able to fight off. I believe they choose e-mycin in case the mother does have undiagnosed STDs and it is effective against those as well. As for blurring of vision, it is not really a concern imo. We use ointments for treatment of all kinds of eye infections in children and adults and they are able to go to school, work, etc and function completely normal. Maybe for 30 minutes or less, the infant will be slightly blurrier, but, honestly they are pretty blurry to begin with! I am sure you can ask to delay the treatment for a few hours, but I really would rethink not getting the ointment at all as it's very harmless, but very effective.

MissusTexas · June 2015

Thankfully, our hospital's policies already include kangaroo care, delayed cord clamping, delayed bath, and all procedures except circumcision done in room.

The eye gel is required by law here in TX but my midwife said that if you really don't want it you can decline.

We will be delaying the Hep B shot and pacifier. We introduced the paci at home and that was perfect for us.

Bailey1823A · June 2015

toccoaparker said:
Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that

Are you planning an epidural cause if so most of the time the effects aren't worn off within the first hour. Also I have worked in 2 different hospitals in labor and delivery as a RN in two different states and immediate postpartum recovery is 2 hours. Basically the nurse has to mash on your belly (top of uterus or fundus) to make sure it is firm and you aren't having excessive bleeding. I am not sure that you will be able to shower in the first hour after delivery because of this, so you may want to check with the hospital you are delivering at

Miz_Liz · June 2015

An epidural. As.Soon.As.Possible.

bpwife&mama · June 2015

No demands. I'm pretty much a go with the flow kind of gal. Had a wonderful birth experience last time, hope it happen again!

toccoaparker · June 2015

Bailey1823A said:

toccoaparker said:
Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that
Are you planning an epidural cause if so most of the time the effects aren't worn off within the first hour. Also I have worked in 2 different hospitals in labor and delivery as a RN in two different states and immediate postpartum recovery is 2 hours. Basically the nurse has to mash on your belly (top of uterus or fundus) to make sure it is firm and you aren't having excessive bleeding. I am not sure that you will be able to shower in the first hour after delivery because of this, so you may want to check with the hospital you are delivering at

I've had two babies at the hospital that I plan on delivering at, hoping that not much has changed since then! It was within the hour that I was up moving around after both babies were born, as long as there are no complications I should be able to do the same this go round?

fionalouise007 · June 2015

bpwife&mama said:
No demands. I'm pretty much a go with the flow kind of gal. Had a wonderful birth experience last time, hope it happen again!

Me too. I told my OB I plan to leave with a baby.. Haha. Also that I'd like the epidural request filled in ready for if I want/need it so we don't have to ask her to come down and fill in the request later when I'm desperate. However, I'm lucky my hospital's standard procedures include a lot of what you mentioned in your post so I don't feel the need to stress about them too much.

jillianmae2ndstar · June 2015

My l&d tour they said they don't offer any pain meds at all, you need to specifically ask for them. The nurse said they don't want to influence the mom when she's focused/struggling. I know pain management is not for everyone but I figured I'd pass that on bc it surprised me.

Perfect Sonnet · June 2015

bpwife&mama said:

No demands. I'm pretty much a go with the flow kind of gal. Had a wonderful birth experience last time, hope it happen again!

Me too. I think trying to control things too much would just end up stressing me out. I have no problems letting the doctors and nurses take the reins. I did with my first birth, and also had a great experience.

mrswiebe09 · June 2015

Yes a lot of your demands are common hospital practice now. Ask during your tour or during one of your checkups.
I am.pretty go with the flow and am happy with my previous c-section experience at my hospital over all and expect to be so again.

deviduke412 · June 2015

Definitely search the newborn eye gel. Most states require it, but luckily mine is one where it can be exempted. If it is required, demand that you want it administered after breastfeeding.

chavemann10 · June 2015

These are all things that I have to request/demand at our hospital. Not because they are behind on times, but because they are a very stand-offish hospital. They like the mothers to take control and steer everything the way they want it. I really like it!

dkizz82 · June 2015

toccoaparker said:
Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that

Wow! Showering within the hour? My hospital has the first two hours set aside for only mom and dad for skin to skin and breastfeeding. I've never had a baby and thought it wasn't recommended to get up that early after delivery. Idk. I'll find out. The nurse said they bathe baby at 6 hours so I just figured I'd shower then. I know I'll definitely want one before that though.

jessandandy09 · June 2015

dkizz82 said:

Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that
Wow! Showering within the hour? My hospital has the first two hours set aside for only mom and dad for skin to skin and breastfeeding. I've never had a baby and thought it wasn't recommended to get up that early after delivery. Idk. I'll find out. The nurse said they bathe baby at 6 hours so I just figured I'd shower then. I know I'll definitely want one before that though.

ahh, I found that the first few hours for me were more about playing with my newborn and taking pictures than wanting to shower. I have showered later the same day with each baby and I definitely wanted to EAT asap!

chavemann10 · June 2015

jessandandy09 said:

dkizz82 said:

Demerol bahaha, but for the most part I think you have it covered. After reading about the eye gel I will be asking that it is not used on my child. I will be delivering vaginally (I hope!) but definitely wanting to be able to take a shower within the hour after delivery and eating after that
Wow! Showering within the hour? My hospital has the first two hours set aside for only mom and dad for skin to skin and breastfeeding. I've never had a baby and thought it wasn't recommended to get up that early after delivery. Idk. I'll find out. The nurse said they bathe baby at 6 hours so I just figured I'd shower then. I know I'll definitely want one before that though.

ahh, I found that the first few hours for me were more about playing with my newborn and taking pictures than wanting to shower. I have showered later the same day with each baby and I definitely wanted to EAT asap!

AMEN!! After fasting since midnight, then a c-section at like noon or 5pm (docs hours)...Food is a priority damn it! LOL

jessandandy09 · June 2015

J&D2007 said:

If I may chime in on the 'eye gel'. I am an eye doctor and want to clarify what pp said. An eye ointment is given to every newborn, whether vaginal or cesarean for prophylactic treatment of conjunctivitis. Despite what you may see on Google, the ointment is to treat ANY form of conjunctivitis and is only erythromycin (very harmless). So, if baby is exposed to any type of bacteria going through the birth canal, whether it be staph or e. Coli (yep, there may be contact with poo and the vagina is full of healthy bacteria) it will prevent a serious infection that baby may not be able to fight off. I believe they choose e-mycin in case the mother does have undiagnosed STDs and it is effective against those as well. As for blurring of vision, it is not really a concern imo. We use ointments for treatment of all kinds of eye infections in children and adults and they are able to go to school, work, etc and function completely normal. Maybe for 30 minutes or less, the infant will be slightly blurrier, but, honestly they are pretty blurry to begin with! I am sure you can ask to delay the treatment for a few hours, but I really would rethink not getting the ointment at all as it's very harmless, but very effective.

thanks for posting this! I am always so confused as to why mothers are against the eye gel. It isn't harmful to the baby but can prevent serious eye infections that may lead to blindness. Newborns don't have great vision right away, in fact it takes time for them to develop any distance vision. That being said, from my memory, the doctors have always put the eye gel on after I have done skin-to-skin and immediate nursing.

KMBC2552 · June 2015

I know my hospitals policies and they completely line up with what I want, so my only request, seeing as I have very fast labors, is to get me that epi QUICK.

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