I'm losing hope with breastfeeding! Has anyone been through this pain??

nitrofem · June 2015

I am having the hardest time breastfeeding. My baby boy is 12 days old and I've been in immense pain since we were in the hospital. I thought at first it was normal soreness but every day it just got worse and worse. I saw 4 different lactation consultants in the hospital--all of which checked his mouth and said he was not tongue tied and said our latch looked basically good. Some would tweak us just a bit but even with their help the pain never stopped. By the time we got home my nipples were cracked, bleeding at every feeding, had scabs, blisters, and severe bruising. I paid to have a lactation consultant come to my house too and she just had me work on my positioning of the baby (never said anything about his lip positioning, how deep his latch was, etc) but as soon as she left we tried and I had the worst and most painful feeding I've ever had. Every time I'd feed him the scabs that had formed would be ripped off and it is just excruciating.

I breastfed my daughter for 13 months so it's extra frustrating because I feel like I SHOULD know what to do to fix this but nothing I try works. Also, he is eating just fine-he's gaining weight so while breastfeeding is terribly painful for me, he doesn't seem to be affected by it at all.

I can tell when he latches that his lower lip is always right under my nipple and is only flanged out some of the time but no matter what I do, I can't seem to get it to be any lower. I've tried different positions, I've tried assisting him in opening his mouth really big, I've tried compressing my breast so it's narrower so it will go further back in his throat and no matter what I do that lower lip ends up in the same place. Or, on the rare occasion I manage to latch him and it's NOT painful, within seconds it seems like he does something or I do and its right back to hurting like crazy.

At this point I can't take the pain and I've resorted to pumping and bottle feeding him the breast milk but it breaks my heart to just not be breastfeeding him. I'm also so scared that he'll be reluctant to go back to breastfeeding if he gets too used to the ease of bottle feeding.

I've been using a salt water soak, Motherlove Organic nipple cream, and Ameda hydrogel cooling pads to try to repair my damaged nipples so I can get back to breastfeeding but it's a slow process and when I have tried to latch him recently I can tell our latch still isn't right.

Sorry for this being so long. I wouldn't wish this physical and emotional pain on anyone else but I'm just hoping that if any of you moms out there have been through something like this that I can learn from your experiences and maybe try something new because I'm feeling like I've done everything I can do, talked to so many different experts, and I'm running out of hope that I'll ever figure out what's going wrong.

Oh, and I've also tried the nipple shield but he wasn't getting enough milk so he was constantly hungry with them and I was constantly engorged. Can anyone help me please??

marijaa333 · June 2015

Was he a preemie or very small by chance? His latch may improve as he gets older. In the meantime, I don't really see anything wrong with pumping if you're able to get enough milk that way. I'm using a combo of pumping and breastfeeding in part due to a bad latch, which has improved quite a bit but still is far from perfect (we did have a tongue tie and had it treated, though).

nitrofem · June 2015

No, he was actually 9 pounds when he was born. But it's encouraging to know that your situation has improved. Do you think it's just because your little one got bigger, was it because of the tongue tie being fixed, or did you do something else that improved the latch?

TracyB4889 · June 2015

I'm a FTM and I had a terrible time breastfeeding for the first 6 weeks. My DD is almost 10 weeks and it's just now getting "enjoyable". After the first week my nipples were so damaged, cracked bleeding and scabbed. I went to a LC who told me her latch was fine, no tongue tie, etc. The LC advised me to stop BF and pump until I was healed. I was reluctant to start the bottle so early at 2.5 weeks old, but I'm glad I did. I think it's all that kept me going. My nipples would never heal because the scabs would open at each feeding, it was terrible. It took almost 3 whole weeks to heal and I used prescription ointment and breast shells the whole time. You may just need to take time to heal and start over again. Since I started BF again after healing it's been so much better. My nipples didn't crack again, and it got so much less painful. I would advise against the nipple shield as well if you can avoid it.

ldmw · June 2015

I recommend exclusively pumping until your nipples are completely healed. After each pump session, rub breast milk on your nipples and let them air dry uncovered.

I started pumping on day 2 due to damaged nipples. I took a break that day from nursing to help my nipples heal. I didn't experience the benefits of healing until I took a full 1-1.5 days off from nursing and pumped exclusively to let them heal. Once they were healed completely it was easier to go back.

For your bottle question, I exclusively pumped from weeks 2-4.5. I tried breastfeeding again a few days ago and LO latched and ate with no problems. I actually think she latched better than she did in the beginning before I stopped. I'm not sure if it's because she got used to proper feeding with a bottle or because she was a few weeks older.

nitrofem · June 2015

TracyB4889 said:

I'm a FTM and I had a terrible time breastfeeding for the first 6 weeks. My DD is almost 10 weeks and it's just now getting "enjoyable". After the first week my nipples were so damaged, cracked bleeding and scabbed. I went to a LC who told me her latch was fine, no tongue tie, etc. The LC advised me to stop BF and pump until I was healed. I was reluctant to start the bottle so early at 2.5 weeks old, but I'm glad I did. I think it's all that kept me going. My nipples would never heal because the scabs would open at each feeding, it was terrible. It took almost 3 whole weeks to heal and I used prescription ointment and breast shells the whole time. You may just need to take time to heal and start over again. Since I started BF again after healing it's been so much better. My nipples didn't crack again, and it got so much less painful. I would advise against the nipple shield as well if you can avoid it.

Wow, that's crazy that your LC said no problems either when clearly something was happening. It's really encouraging to know that just some time passing was enough to help things get better. I hate having to be patient but if that's all it takes and my baby won't have to have any procedures done in his mouth and I can heal all the way and try again, I'll take it! Thanks so much for your story.

nitrofem · June 2015

ldmw said:

I recommend exclusively pumping until your nipples are completely healed. After each pump session, rub breast milk on your nipples and let them air dry uncovered. I started pumping on day 2 due to damaged nipples. I took a break that day from nursing to help my nipples heal. I didn't experience the benefits of healing until I took a full 1-1.5 days off from nursing and pumped exclusively to let them heal. Once they were healed completely it was easier to go back. For your bottle question, I exclusively pumped from weeks 2-4.5. I tried breastfeeding again a few days ago and LO latched and ate with no problems. I actually think she latched better than she did in the beginning before I stopped. I'm not sure if it's because she got used to proper feeding with a bottle or because she was a few weeks older.

That's great to know that you bottle fed for a week and a half and still latched back on with no problem. It's only been 4 days and I was already freaking out so thanks for sharing that.

marijaa333 · June 2015

nitrofem said:

No, he was actually 9 pounds when he was born. But it's encouraging to know that your situation has improved. Do you think it's just because your little one got bigger, was it because of the tongue tie being fixed, or did you do something else that improved the latch?

I think the tongue tie being fixed did play a role but I also think practicing made a big difference. It is still not perfect. it's also much better on one side than the other...go figure. I did stop nursing when it got too painful to let my nipples heal, and now I'm working my way back up to more nursing sessions.

ajs89 · June 2015

I had the same issue and found out after weeks of pain I had thrush. I am currently being treated and have been exclusive pumping for the past 2 weeks. I get really upset about it at times, but at least my baby is getting the milk. Pumping until the pain is gone is not a terrible way to go.

VMRRN23 · June 2015

APNO cream saved my life when I was BFing DS 1. It's made at a compound pharmacy, but using it allowed my bleeding, partially detached nipples to heal while I bf. Wih my second son,I've had no issues (since DS1 partially reconstructed my nipples).

SharonB222 · June 2015

I am a redhead and am told we're more sensitive but also tolerate pain better. OK. Maybe. I don't know. I found BFing painful my 1st-born for maybe two months, with my 2nd-born - OMG - months and months and months and months. Not tongue tied, no signs of infection or anything. OB had nothing, Pedi had nothing. BF group suggested Lanolin; made him barf. He was born 8.5 lbs and frequency fed w/in hrs of birth (milk was in immediately); BF every 2-3 hours for many months. Oh, and he wouldn't take the pacifier - I suppose I was his pacifier. The pain eventually passed - 9 months(!) I think. I chalk it up in part to his frequency of feeding. And perhaps he is what the BFing books call a "barracuda". There was 1 mom in the BF group who said her DD had been. Even though my 2nd-born BF experience was a longer more painful experience, it is now longer less painful experience (DD stopped BF at 16 mo, DS continues at 18 mo). Wishing you less pain. FX.

njbride102007 · June 2015

Possibly a strong suck/ clamp?

laceymarie3 · June 2015

My LO is a week old today, I started have sore nipples before I was D/C but no bleeding. After getting home they just got worse. I saw LC on Monday and she had me hold him across my body with his body turn completely into mine. When he is feeding on my left his feet are out by my right. Then I grab my breast with my thumb close to my areola and my first finger under my breast away from my areola, basically I am making a U with my thumb and finger. When I squeeze it causes the nipple to point to the left, which is towards the roof of his mouth. Then I line my nipple up with his nose, this makes him reach and helps to get him to open wide. I gently touch my breast/nipple to his cheeck (his bottom cheeck) which causes him to root towards the nipple. Once he has a big wide open mouth I, with the help of my husband, literally push him from his shoulders and I have the lower back of his head. Once he latches on my husband takes his finger, sometimes with the corner of a blanket, and he pulls his lower lip/jaw as wide as he can. We are still practicing and trying to improve.

My LC has me washing my hands after each feeding, expressing a little milk to gently rub around then putting a small dab of Polysporin on top. It is definitely helping, now we need to get the latch better so they won't bleed again. Good luck to everyone.

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