Rainbow Baby!! Advice please :)

Howardbae2015 · June 2015

hello everyone, I'm so happy to be returning! I had an early miscarriage in April and started trying as soon as we could... Yesterday I took a pregnancy test (five days before missed period) and two lines!!!!! I have to say although we feel so blessed, I keep reminding myself that it is very early. Last time my Husband and I were over the moon excited, but now I feel like we both are protecting our hearts after the devastation we felt after our previous loss. I feel guilty not to be overjoyed. Has anyone experienced what I am going through? If so, when will the excitement and "good" feelings set in? On another note, we are visiting family this weekend and had plans to visit an amusement park Saturday. Given that I am so early along, should I be concerned? I don't want to tell my family yet but I know they will be suspicious and concerned if I bail out now. Any advice much appreciated!!!

kayjay44 · June 2015

I'm so sorry for your loss. Not that it's the same thing, but my brother died a month before my BFP - I had a really hard time being happy when I was grieving and felt guilty about it too. Knowing other moms with rainbow babies, I'd say it doesn't get easier, you become stronger.

I'd ask your doctor about the amusement park (you can call and speak to an on-call nurse, usually), but I think it's fine this early (I think this came up on my last BMB).

Katty33 · June 2015

I know exactly how you feel - 4 mc's and preg again but to a new partner this time who knows my history and is being so careful...I take a preg test every week or so when I freak out that I'm losing it! It's been 3 weeks since we found out and it's starting to feel ok, helps that the morning sickness etc has been stronger than in my others. Regarding telling your family- I've told my parents because if it does all go wrong again I'll still need support. There is nothing worse than going it alone. Tell your support people, they'll understand and if it does go wrong - fingers crossed it doesn't - they will help you through that as well.

britsknits11 · June 2015

Had this happen to me with my mc before my DS. It was so hard to be happy and excited while we knew that there was a chance we could mc again. Our first real ability to be super excited was when we heard the heartbeat for the first time. I was able to relax a bit more because we hadn't gotten to that stage the first time around and then each subsequent ultrasound built up the joy even more. So I would say don't feel guilty. The excitement will come and it will be even sweeter because now you have a first hand understanding of how precious the little bean growing is

I wish you a sticky baby!

Kiek · June 2015

This is my rainbow baby too. I had a miscarriage back in March. The only people that know are my husband and my sister. I don't plan on sharing with family until my first midwife appointment at 9w5d. Then I'll tell friends when I finish this trimester. I don't see it as being less excited about this baby because I'm thrilled. I'm just soaking in every second this time. Life is so fragile and I'm not ready to share this little life with everyone else. I got so little time with my second baby. Definitely taking a year every week to make sure everything is good, though. As far as the park, I'd ask your dr

CountryAir13 · June 2015

I know how you feel. I had a m/c last October. I think it something that will always be in the back of your mind. It's hard to take one day at a time. But here's hoping for a sticky one for all of us!

MarcoMama86 · June 2015

I felt that way when I was pregnant with my son. I had miscarried in November and was pregnant again my next cycle. No matter what the first trimester is an emotional and anxiety rollercoaster. With my son I finally felt like I could be excited when I saw him and heard his heartbeat at 7 weeks (I went in early because I was having a lot of spotting). I was still nervous knowing it's never a sure thing, but it got easier again when I could feel him moving and I knew he was ok in there. I'm really sorry for your loss and it will get easier as this pregnancy progresses.

As for the trip to the amusement park I would just call your OB to get his or her thoughts on you going on rides this early. If no matter what you don't want to go on rides just go, have a good time, and find a reason not to go on the rides (sorry can't think of a good excuse other than maybe someone needing to stay with the stuff or kind of start the day off saying you don't feel that well so you're not sure if a ride would be the best idea).

Best of luck!

Sprinkles07 · June 2015

I had an mc before ds and I think it's easier to be excited after the first ultrasound. In my opinion though it will hurt all the same to loose this baby whether I allow myself to be excited or not so I'm choosing to be excited. As for family you could go and just don't ride certain rides. Is there a child in the group that can't? You can offer to sit out with them or focus on the games.

PumpkinTi · June 2015

FTM & I had a CP in March - and so was very cautiously optimistic after my bfp at 11dpo; took another test at 18dpo and was already feeling a little more hopeful a few days before that since we had "passed" 15dpo (when I started bleeding in March). I'm now 5w+5d, and am excited, but still sort of feel like I'm holding my breath until we hear the heartbeat... We are also going to tell our parents within a week of that appt - so once I can share the news with someone other than DH and here, I think it will start to feel more "real." I also don't really have much in the way of symptoms, so it doesn't feel so real yet... but I'm sure they'll come...

E3A7AGGIE · June 2015

I had a m/c and c/p before our rainbow and the fears tended to simmer down after the 12 week ultrasound. Beginnings are always scary. Ive had two rainbow since, and I am STILL nervous about things going wrong this time around. I am slowly getting excited, but just knowing how early it is and how there's still plenty of time for things to go 'wrong', Im not crazy happy excited yet.

But it does happen!!!!

lasaleh · June 2015

My husband and I have gone through 2 missed miscarriages, one in October and one in April, and unfortunately it is a little bit harder to be excited. It may just be our personalties, but it has been hard for us to be excited about this pregnancy too. We're just trying to take it one hcg level check at a time haha. Hopefully we'll start feeling excited when we hear our first heartbeat

But I think most mom's to be are anxious to get to 12 weeks and then they relax and feel more at ease. As for the amusement park, I would do what everyone else is suggesting and ask your doctor

froggy994 · June 2015

Congrats! I had a loss last June. I've been nervous about this one, and think it will get better after the first ultrasound. My doctor wanted to check my bloodwork, but that was hell last time. I'm going on vacation on Sunday, and don't want to be stressed about what my hcg is doing. I feel good, and am choosing to be excited and positive. Since we are going on vacation with my husband's side of the family, they will figure out that I'm pregnant much sooner than I probably would have shared the news. Since my husband's side would find out, I figured I should be fair and tell my immediate family, too. I figure if something happens, I'd want their support anyway. I just keep praying and thinking healthy and happy baby.

PrairieGirl45 · June 2015

This is my rainbow baby too. Had a missed miscarriage in December at 12.5 weeks. But I'm still telling family etc right away. It would have been horrible to go through without their support and understanding. My sister in-laws already know lol. Bring cautiously optimistic

Howardbae2015 · June 2015

Thanks everyone, I knew I wasn't alone in feeling this way, I just had to hear it for myself. I'm going to remain positive, it's in God's hands. I hope to stay in the Feb Birth club, sounds like I am in good company!

apainterxx44 · June 2015

I had an early miscarriage in April, I promised myself I wouldn't test early but then yesterday two days before my period I got a bfp midday. I'm very cautious but honestly whatever is happening in my body I'd like to be aware of it, so I am happy I tested early.

I hope everyone has a happy & healthy 9 months and we get our rainbow babies!!

spaceykatie · June 2015

My last pregnancy ended at 16 weeks after my water broke out of nowhere. I'm not sure when I'll get excited. Probably around 27 weeks or so when my water can go all to hell and there's still a high chance of survival.

I don't feel guilty about it though. I mean, I'm excited for the end result, not the state of being pregnant. I don't think there's anything wrong with waiting until there's a little more certainty in the result to get excited.

bublesmiled · June 2015

With our first pregnancy, I mc at 6 wks,but then went on to get pregnant the next month problem free. Now we're pregnant again and DH won't get excited because he's scared. I understand it, but it's a real damper on my being happy and excited. I'm a true believer in what happens happens, there's nothing you can do to change it. Good luck to us all! Hope to enjoy this journey with all of you.

rissawebber · June 2015

This is such a reassurance to me too! I'll be four weeks tomorrow and I've been so nervous after miscarrying in March. I'm trying to be positive and waiting for blood work

seckenrode · June 2015

@PumpkinTi you could be me talking! Same situation, dates, and symptoms (or lack there of). Good luck to us both and every lady on here! Xox

mtkbaby · June 2015

I am currently 4 weeks and 5 days pregnant with our Rainbow baby!

I went to the doctor twice and confirmed that my HGC levels doubled so they told me it was a viable pregnancy and I will go back for an ultrasound at 8 weeks. Well, I wish I could continue knowing that my HGC levels are rising. I never took a Clear Blue test that tells you how far along you are, but I have seen them on other boards. I was thinking if I took one every week it would put my mind at ease to see the week estimate on the test get higher. Do you guys think that would work or should I save my money and just chill out?

brittandbaby13 · June 2015

I feel the same. I had a M/C in July of last year and I just found out I was pregnant about 3 days ago. My boyfriend is excited, but it didn't come as such an excitement to me. I am grateful that I get a second chance but it's kinda scary this time around. Good luck to you !

pritzgmf · June 2015

I had a miscarriage last August. Went in for my 12 week appointment and found out the babe didn't grow past 8w5d, only a few days after our ultrasound in which we heard a strong heartbeat. I'm cautiously optmistic and choosing joy over fear because whatever happens, it's beyond my control and I don't want to spend the next few weeks not allowing myself to be happy about this babe. We have told our families and we love their support. I have an early dating ultrasound scheduled at 7 weeks and will slowly tell close friends after that. Praying for a healthy 9 months for all of us!

ejackl82 · June 2015

I had a miscarriage about a year ago, and have been going to a fertility clinic for the last year. I just got my first positive test a week ago, went to get a blood test and then a follow up to make sure the hcg level was going up. We are so excited, but keep having to talk each other down because it is still early on. We want to be over the moon, but are afraid. I panic at every cramp, keep fearing that I am bleeding. I will relax a little bit when I go in for the ultrasound in two weeks.

ladybutler · June 2015

We have two rainbow babies. Currently my husband is really guarded due to the medication I have been on due to back surgery. We are high risk as it it's and add this to the mix. He doesn't want to get too excited if baby doesn't have a chance (a certain bone growth stimulant that was places in the cages in my back could go through placenta and fuse babies bones) I meet with my high risk drs next week to see what babies chances are. I'm hopeful and will stay positive!

DWorthy5 · June 2015

We have a rainbow baby as well! We had a mc last Oct at 10 weeks. Went in for an ultrasound and had no idea that this was going to be the outcome! I had no signs of an mc. I'm 5 wks 3 d and we are being cautious! Blood Work looks good so far, ultrasound at 7 wks!! Staying positive!!

moomee · June 2015

@Howardbae2015 I had an early miscarriage in April, too, so I'm in the same boat. My boyfriend and I are excited, but we're cautious, as well. I think we'll both feel at ease once we see a heartbeat.

lovekat614 · June 2015

@Howardbae2015 @moomee I had an early miscarriage in April as well! Definitely being very cautious this time around as last time DH and I both told our parents. We're going to wait until hopefully after the first trimester to spill the beans!

bbax44 · June 2015

I had a missed miscarriage in January of this year, found out at my 12 week ultrasound that baby only measured 8w5d with no heartbeat. The most devastating day, i remember it vividly. Got pregnant again in april and miscarried at 5weeks almost 6 in the beginning of may. The dr had me get bloodwork done to make sure the levels went down etc.. And here I am again. 5w3d. Trying my best to stay positive and not worry or freak out at every cramp or pain. H&H 9mo to us all

bookishbaker · June 2015

I'm in the same boat- early missed miscarriage in March, which has left me very hesitant to fully engage in this pregnancy. I'm working on feeling less guarded so I can enjoy this pregnancy, though- I don't want my fear to overshadow the joy of this moment. Best wishes to everyone!

Howardbae2015 · June 2015

Thanks everyone for sharing with me. So an update... Never went to the amusement park, I doubt anything would have happened but if something did, I would always wonder if that had anything to do with it. Worked out great though, blamed it on the DH, who took one for the team! No one suspected a thing when I wanted to stay behind with him. Tomorrow will be the first day of my missed period, I'm going to wait next week after i have fully missed a period to make a doctors appointment. I may be totally paranoid but I swear I was already having mild symptoms last time, I just remember that I had terrible heartburn and swore boobs. As of right now I feel nothing, just a positive test. But to keep me from losing my mind I am going to go about my business this week, safely of course, and try not to think about it (the best I can). Best of luck to everyone!

kmvirg02 · June 2015

I'm not sure I'll ever let my guard down. I've lost three babies now all between the 16-17th week of pregnancy. We have no known reason for these losses and it makes it so hard for me to enjoy it. I'm 6w5d and praying everyday for God to give me strength to make it through another pregnancy. Good luck to all of you ladies.

camoxley · June 2015

This is my rainbow baby too! My mason passed away because she stopped growing after 6 weeks in October of 2013. Then came divorce, remarriage, and now with my second husband we are pregnant with our first!

I know I'm with a new spouse, but there's always that fear in the back of my mind everytime I go to the bathroom or wake up in the morning. I just take each day one at a time and take each pregnancy symptom with appreciation and a full heart. It sounds crazy to be thankful for throwing up all day and a stuffy nose each morning with dizziness and cotton mouth but once you've experienced what we have, it's a sign baby nugget is still there and growing.

pritzgmf · June 2015

Joining you in prayer for your miracle!

4N6s · June 2015

I'm so happy to be pregnant again, but extremely paranoid of miscarrying again. It's hard to be excited when my last pregnancy ended so tragically.

Hang in there, you're not alone.

Eastcoastbeachmom2016 · June 2015

Same boat for me too! Mc in April/may do DH and I are cautiously excited:) trying not to think about it! Xo

Natachamommy2eight · June 2015

First Congratulations! And big hug! I had a miscarriage back in March..we have told everyone already and really trying to enjoy this little one and each day we have with himnor her...As i see it ,if this lil is called home to the Lord i'm still going to grief as much as i would if i didn't get 'attached'...celibate the lil live u have growing in you...remember this is a new baby and a new pregnancy...none of us are promised a baby in February...live in today..in the blessing of being pregnant today and your lil one being knitted to gether in your womb today...big big hug

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