Cart before the Horse?

mrsmommya · June 2015

Curious what your thoughts are about looking at things like baby names, announcements, and the like while ttc?

kerismatic · June 2015

We just started TTC and have a name picked out for either sex. And I'd be lying if I didn't say I haven't looked at announcements and pinned ideas on pintrest. IMO it's okay to be excited and do these things, but I can also see how that initial excitement and looking around may actually lead to frustration if getting KU doesn't happen right away...

Everycol0r · June 2015

You shouldn't refrain from hoping & dreaming just because something has not yet come to pass. As long as it's not to painful, I think it's only natural to pick things out, get ideas and dream. If we weren't allowed to dream about things just because we hadn't gotten it yet, life would be very grey indeed.

je5sc0 · June 2015

We have picked out names for either sex already. And I have all my ideas sorted out on Pinterest. If it works for you then great!:) I have eased up a bit because it definitely makes me feel kinda blue when AF shows up. To each their own!

mikaela20 · June 2015

I don't shop for anything baby, but I do already have my nursery design and announcement ideas pinned to a secret pinterest board.

My DH and I have been brainstorming names since before we even got engagement ( we have a hard time agreeing on any) - but its just a cute lighthearted thing we do.

None of this affects my stress or patience levels- its just fun. But everyone is different- as long as its something that makes you happy I think its fine. If its making you more frustrated each cycle you don't conceive,then I would agree that its not a good thing to do.

ACleanLife24 · June 2015

I am living vicariously though my BFFs pregnancy... this enables me to indulge my crazies for announcements, showers, nurseries but not attach them to myself...

Also I am going to give all my pinterest fail baby crafts to her kid

cattlebride · June 2015

I think as long as its not depressing or hurtful for you there is no problem day dreaming about possibilities.

PugsandKisses · June 2015

As long as it is not an obsession or causing you pain, then you are ok. When getting ready to TTC or my first, I would buy baby stuff randomly. Like gender-neutral wash clothes and gowns and what not.

However, we had my first child name picked out at 16ish. Once I found out the sex, it was THAT name. Once baby was born, I felt guilty for it. Like I did not like about how the name would fit THIS child. Luckily for me, the name fits perfectly. I just felt really bad for having it ready for years before I even TTC.

jervisamy · June 2015

I say dream and plan as much as you are comfortable with. Yes it might make the anticipation that much more but it will also make the reward that much sweeter. This is a personal journey and do you makes you happy.

KLake42 · June 2015

I'm aiming for balance. I want to think positive, and envision everything that I want coming true. But I'm afraid that if I already had some tiny little clothes here, a BFN would be more painful than it already is.

My solution-- I'm focusing on books about raising kids. Kids, not babies. I'm trying to get an idea about the different kinds of challenges I'll face, and what my basic philosophies should be around those challenges. I'm learning about how kids learn. Stuff like that.

That's all stuff that will still be a ways in the future, when I do get pregnant, so there's less of a sense of immediacy. That's what works for me.

gravcass · June 2015

@KLake42 I've never thought about it from that angle but it's a great idea! I could see doing it as a couple and hashing out before hand what kinds of things come up unexpectedly for some.

mrsmommya · June 2015

Ok tell me this...

We are getting family pictures at the end of June. I found an adorable big sister shirt at a garage sale. Would it be over the top to have the photographer (she is an acquaintance and has done our pictures yearly for 3 years) take a picture of our daughter in that shirt? Obviously, the picture would be used to announce a future pregnancy.

Everycol0r · June 2015

Mrs Mommy said:
Ok tell me this...

We are getting family pictures at the end of June. I found an adorable big sister shirt at a garage sale. Would it be over the top to have the photographer (she is an acquaintance and has done our pictures yearly for 3 years) take a picture of our daughter in that shirt? Obviously, the picture would be used to announce a future pregnancy.

Yes. Save that moment for after you get a BFP. It'll mean more.

kerismatic · June 2015

I agree with @Everycol0r... give your photographer the heads up that you're hoping to have her catch that special moment when it comes.

dande2129 · June 2015

Everycol0r said:

You shouldn't refrain from hoping & dreaming just because something has not yet come to pass. As long as it's not to painful, I think it's only natural to pick things out, get ideas and dream. If we weren't allowed to dream about things just because we hadn't gotten it yet, life would be very grey indeed.

I love this.

When we first started TTC in December, I did all of that because, having two children already, we naturally assumed that this would be an easy peasy process.

Not so much.

Even still, I dreamed. I hoped. I wished. I pinned sh*t to a secret board. And then, I had to step away from it. I occasionally go back to it when I need a reminder why I am doing what I am doing.

Carazona5 · June 2015

I've been doing these things since before I met my husband. Lol, I think it's normal as long as it's not becoming an obsession. But I feel like most girls on Pinterest who aren't married have a "future wedding" Pinterest board right? Or a "bucket list" things to do board... So what's the difference having a "future baby" board? It's fun and something to do to keep your hopes up and your mind off things when you're waiting to test or whatever lol
Also, looking at things like that gives me a good idea of how much things will cost, all the new baby gadgets and what I'll need to save or put away to prepare for it all.

I've got that board, and have discussed baby names with hubby, and once in a great while if i see a baby outfit way too cute or on clearance, I buy it and put it away in a special box like a hope chest sort of thing. But I won't decorate a nursery or anything like that.

To a point it's all just fun and hopefulness

SmallDogM0M209 · June 2015

We've had names for both sexes picked out since before we were TTC. Family names that have a lot of meaning to us. I've recently gotten into searching nursery ideas on Instagram & Pinterest. I was feeling silly for doing so & my BFF (who is a toddler mom) put it into perspective for me: "You spent almost your whole life, since you were a little girl, thinking & planning your future wedding... now that you've had that, it's only natural to want to start thinking about and planning for the next stage." I've managed to refrain from purchasing anything at this point, but I ALMOST bought a diaper bag the other day! (I have a weakness for overpriced handbags.)

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