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May 2015 Moms
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Any tips for a deep sleeping husband?

ldmwldmw member
in May 2015 Moms
my husband is not adjusting well to the middle of the night feedings. Any tips anyone has learned to help? He doesn't hear the baby cry/stir so I have to make sure I take care of baby and then get him awake to help. When he is awake, he's a zombie so I have to repeatedly tell him what to do in caring for her. Part of me is almost ready to have him stop helping because it's more stress on me than anything to have him help. But, I have to pump each time we get up to feed and I know the times I do it on my own I only get 30 minutes of sleep vs 1.5 hours when we feed together.
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Re: Any tips for a deep sleeping husband?

  • TheEATheEA member
    My husband was the same with our first. I gave up on him helping me with night duty, but I didn't have to pump every time. He worked during the week while I stayed at home. To make up for not helping with night feedings, he would take on as much as possible during the weekends. He would get up with the baby on Saturday and Sunday morning so I could sleep in and he would take care of baby most of the day so I could nap as much as I needed. Having him take over most of the baby care on his days off helped me keep my sanity.
    From my experience it's hard to set a baby care schedule with your SO until you know what's going to actually work for both of you. Good luck!
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  • montanchelsymontanchelsy member
    My Husband was the same with our 1st. I ended up doing the night feedings by myself, it was easier.
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  • supersarah77supersarah77 member
    Ditto to PPs. I just handle the night time, it's much less stressful. DH contributes in other ways.
    Me: 38, DH: 35
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  • ldmwldmw member
    I need the help and have no patience for it either. We'd all like sleep but we're in this together. Took two to have a baby and it takes us both to raise it.
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  • TBsquaredTBsquared member
    I kicked my husband out of the bedroom lol I breastfeed so there's not much he can do now that I'm not in pain down there. He's more of an annoyance with is snoring than he is helpful so he sleeps downstairs now. I wasn't getting much sleep and he made it worse with his snoring...that's what works for us! I just make him my maid during the day haha

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  • mommydoopmommydoop member
    No husband help either, not worth having two cranky people. Now that we have two kids he takes our 2 year old for a few hours in the am so I can get a little more sleep.
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  • mamajama3mamajama3 member
    lol I first mistakenly read this as tips for deep cleaning husband. My DH is covering nights and I've got DD all day but he is really struggling and she's been staying up all night keeping him awake so I may be taking over soon. It's awful with the night feedings and missing sleep, and I don't have a lot of advice other than to hang in there and maybe take it over yourself and try to sleep more during the day. It looks like from what I've read that around 4 months old it gets easier as babies sleep longer (it's a long way away but it will go by quickly for us all I think).
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  • canadianmom89canadianmom89 member
    Since I am home for a year with LO and DH works, I handle everything from 11pm until dinner time when DH gets home from work. It can be exhausting but you do what you have to do. When DH gets home he will take LO for a few hours so I can sleep or take a shower and on the week ends he will get up around 7 am and let me sleep for a few hours but for 16-18 hours a day during the week I am on my own.
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  • mrswynn2014mrswynn2014 member
    Same here, I tried to get DH to help at first when he was off work, but it was impossible to wake him up. So I do night time duty. Unfortunately that was what was the easiest.
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  • enigmaticjjenigmaticjj member
    Lurking from June. My husband has hearing damage so we got a monitor that vibrates. The plan is to have the parent unit under the pillow. That may help wake your spouse up.

    Not sure of the zombie thing unless you just force yourself to take a step back and let him realize on his own he needs to make himself more alert.
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