Is there a polite way?

fridaysdance · May 2015

Ever since the long trip to l&d last week, people have been calling or texting nonstop to ask about the baby and when she'll be here. Most of them don't bother to check in when I'm not pregnant. I haven't been feeling like myself anyway since I don't feel like being as active as I'm used to and not working. As much as I love this kid, it's driving me crazy that all anybody cares about is her and not that I need sleep or rest.

I don't want to whine, but hints don't work and I have had 7 different people contact me today. It's been a minimum of 3 every other day and I can't ignore them or they call back. DH and I have both tried telling them I'm fine and need rest but will let people know when there is news or she's here, depending on who it is. No one seems to understand and the constant phone ringing is making me crazy. I need the phone on because my grandmother is having surgery, but I need a break.

Anybody have any suggestions on polite ways to get people to stop calling or texting nonstop? A few more weeks of this might make me lose it on somebody.

mrs1374a · May 2015

Ignore them.

karaelaine1991 · May 2015

If you have an iPhone, I believe there's a way you can put it on "do not disturb" mode. I don't have an iPhone so I am not sure how to do this, but I've heard that you can set it so that only certain calls, texts, etc. can get through. That way you'd only hear from whoever's calling about your grandma, but your phone wouldn't wake you up for calls/texts from anyone else.

Those of you with iPhones, am I totally crazy or is this a thing?

NotISaidtheCat · May 2015

Honestly, I would just turn the phone off and reroute grandma updates to hubby's phone. Good luck!

fridaysdance · May 2015

I have an android that barely works. It's time for an upgrade, but we're waiting on contracts to expire. I tried ignoring people but the phone kept ringing and DH is at work for a few more hours 45 minutes away.

Sammy K · May 2015

I read about someone who changed their vm message to be an update (or non-update in this case) and then didn't answer. I would ignore texts.

mlindzz · May 2015

Perhaps try ending each conversation as you have been, by reiterating that you need rest, but by also adding that YOU will contact them when you're up for a chat or visit.

If they still don't listen, let your hubby be filter calls so you aren't having to deal with them. Good luck! Hope you feel better soon.

fridaysdance · May 2015

@Sammy K the voicemail sounds like a good idea.

lovethatcolosun · May 2015

Maybe change your voicemail to say something like, "hi this is ______, I can't take your call right now as I'm taking these last few days or weeks to rest and prepare for baby's arrival. You are welcome to leave a message, but be forgiving if we don't get back to you until after baby is born." Then send all calls to voicemail besides grandma.

KaLikeAWind · May 2015

I was going to suggest the VM thing too. Set your outgoing message to 'I'm fine, just resting and I'll let everyone know when there is something to know' and let all calls go there. Ignore texts. I actually used to do this even when I wasn't pregnant, I called them sanity weekends.

fridaysdance · May 2015

Thanks for the suggestions ladies. I think I may do something along those lines.

enigmaticjj · May 2015

karaelaine1991 said:
If you have an iPhone, I believe there's a way you can put it on "do not disturb" mode. I don't have an iPhone so I am not sure how to do this, but I've heard that you can set it so that only certain calls, texts, etc. can get through. That way you'd only hear from whoever's calling about your grandma, but your phone wouldn't wake you up for calls/texts from anyone else.

Those of you with iPhones, am I totally crazy or is this a thing?

This is correct.

Browder5 · May 2015

Yes ma'am this is a thing! Add the select few that you need to stay in contact with to your favorites list and then on the do not disturb setting click accept calls from favorites only.

rpazzaam · May 2015

I am sure they are just concerned & excited, so try not to be mad at your loved ones. I havent really had anyone check up on me & honestly it can get kinda sad. Just saying be thankful. They are being nice. But the vm is good idea, also respond by text & already have a good paste & copy message ready. Also pick a person to update ppl & that can relay news if anything happens of concern. You don't want to cry wolf & shoo everyone away, then be alone when something happens.

kherman14 · May 2015

When I had gone to hospital cuz I was experiencing crazy stuff. I did NOT tell anyone but my mother. Then, when I arrived back home I told MIL...she was good, just limit detail...not further. Of course she told Grandma in Law. I got the feeling she was upset i wont share the info because i am fine. She kept asking what happened, I told her I am fine and I don't want to talk about it. So, ignore them. Tell them you are FINE and you will call them when it arrives.

queequeg09256 · May 2015

I have an android and you can block calls ok it too. Do you have a samsung? Hubby has a dnd on that only allows calls from me after 9pm til 6am. So on android you can do it too. I've avoided telling people I'm going to the hospital, I had to go 3 separate times, luckily I told no one and neither did hubby. I told my mom the next day and she told everyone but that I was also fine. Not making that mistake again, next time peeps get to know anything is with a pic of lo. Also hope your grandma does well in surgery.

queequeg09256 · May 2015

My setting is under blocking mode on my s3 galaxy.

mishmardhiono · May 2015

Restrict the information your sending out. We are getting annoyed by the texts/calls but we are also not giving away any information. Unless your family you don't know our due date. People are asking when I'm due, I say June, now the questions are starting about induction. We aren't even in June yet!

We are being induced in Monday, immediate family only know this. We will then stem our announcements over the week or so. We also have to be respectful with our announcements as hubby's family is overseas and my siblings are all working away and won't be home for a week. I don't want a single photo on Facebook or announcement until our families get the privilege of skyping us to meet LO and also my family returning from work and getting to meet baby.

taboullio84 · May 2015

Tell them you are going to start charging per text / phone call.....

Seriously though , I would just tell them one final time you will let them know... Then block those numbers pending "go time"

fridaysdance · May 2015

I am greatful for their concern. It's just the people who call every day asking the same questions that bother me. They know the situation and why i'm resting at home. We had to tell family because they were planning to leave town and doctors think I can go anytime. We had to tell our pastors since we're usually in charge of the youth classes and needed to find someone to sub for us. Since we had to tell those few people, news got out whether I wanted it to or not.

I think I found the call block setting so I may try that when I really need sleep.

karaelaine1991 · May 2015

queequeg09256 said:

I have an android and you can block calls ok it too. Do you have a samsung? Hubby has a dnd on that only allows calls from me after 9pm til 6am. So on android you can do it too. I've avoided telling people I'm going to the hospital, I had to go 3 separate times, luckily I told no one and neither did hubby. I told my mom the next day and she told everyone but that I was also fine. Not making that mistake again, next time peeps get to know anything is with a pic of lo. Also hope your grandma does well in surgery.

I have an android (Samsung Galaxy 4 mini) and had no idea it had this feature! Thanks for this info, I'm glad to know it just in case I end up needing it!

kherman14 · May 2015

Great advice! I will plan on doing that!

LAO12 · May 2015

Love the VM idea!!!

Is there a polite way?

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