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Overwhelmed and fearful

cgragsdacgragsda member
in Infertility
Hey girls, I use to be a major lurker on the boards almost five years ago but decided to stop because I felt that getting pregnant started to become an obsession. I'm back and just need to know someone gets it and understands.

I am 30 years old and my husband is 40 and we live in SC. I was diagnosed with PCOS and Endometriosis in 2008. We did get a "semen" work up on him and he is fine. I've had an HSG done and was on Metformin for a while. I kept up with my ovulation calander and diary of cervical discharge. The only thing we haven't tried are IVF treatments.

We did get a referral for a reproductive specialist but never had the chance to go. In 2012 I was laid off and have not been able to find steady work. The end result is that we can't even afford to look at any IVF treatments and our credit went down the shoot because of the lose of my job.

For the past couple of years I thought I had come to peace with the thought of never having a child but that changed recently and just feel so overwhelmed. I used to have friends that were going through infertility but they have all gotten PG and some are expecting their second. We live in an apartment (I don't want to raise a child in an apartment), our credit is bad so it would take years to get it back up to where we could afford a home, I'm 30 (everyone says that I'm still so young but with my husband being 40 that changes things) and I don't want to be 40 when I get PG.

I just don't know where to start and feel like I have no one to talk to. My husband says he gets it to but I just feel like I've let him down and want nothing more than to enjoy the love and happiness most couples have.

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Re: Overwhelmed and fearful

  • AshKazmiAshKazmi member
    I totally get the feeling of letting down the DH. Having said that it seems like you've been very blessed with an understanding husband(just like me). It really sucks that we have to go throught the heart ache of infertility, but we should consider ourselves lucky that at the very least we have a DH that doesn't blame us or make us feel worse :). I really hope you find a good job and are able to turn your situation around. Even if you get your bfp living in an apartment your children will be loved and cherished and that's what is most important.
    Married February 2012 TTC 2 years 4 months Diagnosis: PCOS and dh low morphology 1 MC at 9 weeks
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  • cgragsdacgragsda member
    Thank you for the kind words. I was a little nervousr to post about everything. Bump boards used to be very harsh and downright hurtful.
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  • tlateeftlateef member
    Have you tried IUI cycles? It's not as invasive as IVF and so much less expensive. I have good insurance that covered a few so you may want to look in terms of what yours would cover so you don't go into debt over it. PCOS is not th final sentence we make it out to be. With a little help you CAN get pregnant. Even without IUI. I was PCOS diagnosed over the summer and did 3 IUI cycles and all led to negative pregnancy tests. However, after my last IUI cycle I did get pregnant with twins, just not from the insemination process. The problem is with pcos you don't ovulate regularly and even with meds and doctor monitoring you can't be positive when it will happen. That's why my insemination didn't work but the egg follicles that grew from that cycle did eventually release and I got pregnant from intercourse. So even without full blown IUI cycles you may still be able to qualify to do the medications that they give you on these cycles and try to conceive that way. If there's nothing wrong with the sperm the IUI isn't really necessary it just ensures the sperm gets where it needs to be. It CAN happen to you. I just turned 28 so I'm close to 30 myself and my pregnancy is now at 27w4d for twin boys. Don't lose hope! Feel free to private message me if you have any questions. Good luck!
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