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Help Please!

TaraMcK87TaraMcK87 member
in November 2015 Moms
I need some help from all my fellow mums to be....
All I want is too relax and enjoy this whole pregnancy experience but I am finding it so hard not to get myself worked up and panicky in thinking about the birth. I'm only 16 weeks and really would like to have fun and treasure this experience. Any tips on how I can put future thoughts aside for the time being?
Thank you all so much in advance!!!
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Re: Help Please!

  • Ceb2015Ceb2015 member
    Maybe it would help to read a positive birthing book like Ina Mae's Guide to Childbirth? That one is supposed to provide encouraging words. I have it and haven't started yet, but a lot of ladies on here have mentioned it.

    Another thing you could do is sign up for a birthing class that would outline the process and coping techniques. It could help! Good luck!
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  • VexyMommyVexyMommy member
    I felt similarly with my first child and it turned out to be a breeze.  Have you ever had your wisdom teeth removed or any fairly minor procedure at a doctor's office or hospital?  It's not that different.  It's a tough couple of hours and then you're done and you have a beautiful baby in your arms and you don't really remember how it felt physically after about the first week or two.  (At least I didn't.)   
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  • Pontot31Pontot31 member
    It's going to happen one way or another.
    I second Ina May's books. They are so empowering.

    As someone who had a fairly traumatic labor and delivery I'm here again. And looking back it wasn't bad. Totally worth it in the end. You forget the pain the moment you have the baby in your arms.
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  • MargaretC5MargaretC5 member
    Pontot31 said:



    As someone who had a fairly traumatic labor and delivery I'm here again. And looking back it wasn't bad. Totally worth it in the end. You forget the pain the moment you have the baby in your arms.

    This exactly! I think it is more the fear of the unknown. I know what I am in for this time and I am much calmer about it.
    For my first any time I would start to worry about it I would walk thru my birth plan in my head. Repeating the plan helped me calm down.
    Also try to talk to women that had positive birth experiences. My mom and aunt were both great to talk to. My aunt had planned a home birth that ended in a c section but she communicated it so positively it was wonderful to hear her experience.

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  • VexyMommyVexyMommy member
    I had a very easy experience.  After a few hours of labor I requested an epidural, kicked my family out because they were annoying me, took a nap and woke up to my daughter crowning.  It felt like a very large bm.  There was no tearing and no after effects.  I was sent home with a bottle of pills for pain and never ended up needing them. 
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  • shannon102514shannon102514 member
    If ur ok with pain I'm sure you will do wonderful! I was nervous too with my first but who isn't! Just know there are so many nurses and doctors on the hospital to make sure everything goes smoothly! They will take great care of you!!
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  • lvbyrdlvbyrd member
    My mom gave me this advice when I talked to her the other day ( that baby is coming out one way or another and stressing over it will not make a difference, relax and enjoy your pregnancy because it goes by quickly ) now my family tends to be quite the straight shooters when it comes to advice but she did make me feel better.
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  • wulfpackgirlwulfpackgirl member
    I'm nervous about it too but trying not to think about it right now. I can handle one day of pain for a sweet little baby. Just focus on the end result. That's what I keep telling myself.
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  • sarahsnowballsarahsnowball member
    STM here and I'm nervous too due to a few complications last time. But like a PP already said, I'm here for a second time and about to do it all again! It's totally worth it.
    My advice is to read as much as you can to get all the info you can about the process of childbirth and pain relief options. But in the meantime try to focus on what's happening now (finding out the sex, the anatomy scan, growing a lump the size of a watermelon etc)
    By November you'll be so ready to meet your baby that you'll take a deep breath, find all your courage and trust your body to do what it was made for.
    Be brave, Mama. You can do this!
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  • mamavbsmamavbs member
    edited May 2015
    I'm on baby three and in the back of my head, I'm still nervous. I've had a csection then a VBAC and will be going for another VBAC. But in the front of my mind I keep reminding myself that there's just no way of knowing how it's all gonna go, so no point in worrying about it.

    You could find it completely fine and have a lovely birth then all that worrying was for nothing :) As long as the result is a healthy bub and you're okay, then it was a successful birth. Plus you'll definitely forget it, I know my labour hurt but I couldn't compare the pain to anything or recall how it felt. It's natures way of making us do it again and again! X_X
    I would recommend researching what's happening to your body, I found it so reassuring knowing what was happening to me. Takes the panic away a bit!


    *edit: 3 year old pressed post before I was ready haha*
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  • VexyMommyVexyMommy member
    MargaretC5 said:
    I had a very easy experience.  After a few hours of labor I requested an epidural, kicked my family out because they were annoying me, took a nap and woke up to my daughter crowning.  It felt like a very large bm.  There was no tearing and no after effects.  I was sent home with a bottle of pills for pain and never ended up needing them. 
    Where do I sign up for this birth experience?
    lol.  I like to tell mine because it was nice and easy.  It counteracts the ladies who like to tell scary stories to terrified first time moms.       
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  • Meganb005Meganb005 member
    I'm looking into birthing options right now so that I'm armed and prepared for it. I really want to have a natural birth so I am reading about hypnobirthing and the Bradley method. Hopefully you will find something that works for you! And seriously, having a baby is hard! If you need an epidural to be able to enjoy it, do it! Any way that baby comes into the world makes you a rockstar!!
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  • Elyse1384Elyse1384 member
    STM here and I was so fixated on the delivery the first time around. I was afraid of tearing, the pain and everything in between from the horror stories pumped into my head by "friends" and Hollywood dramatic licenses. I can tell you with complete confidence that it wasnt bad at all! Yes, I was fortunate to have no complications. Yes, contractions are not my idea of a good time, but they were manageable. Yes, I was dog tired at the end of it all. Boy was it worth it! I got an epidural and boy did that help! My body still received the queues it needed and I didn't even know that I tore! I could do this again and again for the beautiful moment when my LO is placed on my chest and we can breathe a sigh of relief and joy together. Don't let anyone scare you. All births are different and women respond differently than others. You will be fine. Women have literally been doing this forever!
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  • TaraMcK87TaraMcK87 member
    Thank you so much everyone!! So glad I am a part of this and have you all to talk to and share feelings with!! Thanks to each and everyone of you!!! Xx
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