Trauma/Stress during pregnancy

dawnfoote · May 2015

We had just got back from a wonderful babymoon, it was perfect and super relaxing. A week after we got back whilst at the gym my very fit and active husband collapsed whilst on the treadmill. He suffered a cardiac arrest. His PT was there & fortunately worked on him straight away and acted fast, I got there within 15 minutes after getting a call at work. The next few hours we didn't know if he's made it or not. We were finally told they had a heart rhythm & they took him to intensive care. I remember saying 'this can't happen, it's not an option - he has to be okay' by this point I was already obviously showing our bump. He was 3 weeks in intensive care, everyone kept saying how strong I was being but all I could focus on was he was still with us and we would work through this, there was no reason in my mind not to be strong. (Until you listened to the potential negative outcomes by some of the doctors) every day was a rollercoaster whilst he fought of pneumonia infections and they kept trying to bring him round. Eventually we got there and he was released to cardio care, then an op for a defib to be fitted and then onto neuro rehab (due to starvation of oxygen to the brain which causes memory, speech and other neuro issues) - 8 weeks on and he has done amazing in terms of recovery - now at home and continuing some minor rehab work but he's 100% him, which they kept saying was unlikely. I just feel really blessed as I know the stats and him surviving that initial incident was around a 3% chance, never mind doing as well as he is.

Over the last 3 weeks he has remembered we are expecting our first child (hard not to tell now, very big bump) & is looking forward to us becoming a parents. All though doesn't remember the journey we have been on to get here

What's hard, is I sit reading all the baby posts and updates about what the partner should be doing to support, but tbh I just think simply him being here is enough. I feel in a very different place to other expectant mums, our baby bubble is some what different. Once we start NCT classes etc I think that will help restore some normality.

I do of course worry of the toll all the worry has had over the last 8 weeks, but I've been told the middle trimester was the best one for 'stress' to occur. So just as we enter the third one, we are hoping for a more blissful & baby centric three months.

The hypnobirth techniques i learnt actually came in useful during all of this, the breathing and relaxation techniques. I also made sure I was eating and sleeping, as best I could.

I certainly appreciate the strength that is gained by having a supportive partner and also how strong we are together. The focus now is on our baby arriving safely to meet there dad

I'm lovely feeling all the baby kicks, now 28 weeks and it's the most amazing feeling

Never take anything for granted x

Jenni329 · May 2015

What an amazing couple of people you are. I'm sorry you've had to go through all of that but in the end your baby will have fantastic parents who know the true meaning of love and endurance. The best of luck to all of you.

malonc2 · May 2015

What a powerful story. It definitely puts things in perspective. I'm sorry you had to go through this and so happy for your family that things are going well!

amk013 · May 2015

You both sound incredible! Your child is blessed with a strong set of parents! I'll keep you in my prayers.

mrsb30 · May 2015

I'm so sorry you are going through this! I'm praying for you and your husband that he will continue to recover well! You both are very strong!

Saratiff · May 2015

Glad he is doing do much better!!! Sounds like the three of you had a rough journey but your family is full of fighters!! Here is to having a much more relaxing third trimester :-)

Miz_Liz · May 2015

Thank you for sharing. I am so glad to hear henis doing great and home again! I am also so glad someone was with him who knew what to do and did it! I personally am a CPR/First Aid instructor. I am a firm believer EVERYONE should learn how to do CPR and First Aid...even those who say, "I can't...I hate blood," or something. My theory is this: if you are the only one there when someone collapses (let's say a loved one), wouldn't you rather know what you need to do in hopes that it empowers you to do it than be in that situation and wish you knew what to do? You are no worse off for knowing. I happened to drive up on a car accident that had just happened about two weeks ago. One driver was pinned and terrified. No one was helping her. No one was even talking to her to keep her calm. Knowing how to handle these situations makes all the difference. I have also had to hook someone up to an AED...and I am not in the medical field....this was at work. You just never know!! OP, I am really sooo happy to hear he is recovering....your story was very touching. You are a strong woman, you two will be amazing parents!!

holli0801 · May 2015

Wow. I cannot imagine. Soooo glad to hear things are going well now! Sometimes all you can do is take it one day at a time. Thanks for your sharing story. Will be thinking of you and your family!!

breezymeema7 · May 2015

Whoa! That's crazy! I'm so glad he's home and recovering. I hope you both have a relaxing 3rd tri where you can bond and create some wonderful pre-baby memories.

SashaDenn25 · May 2015

Keeping my thoughts with you and your family. Youre a strong woman!!!

emmacake08 · May 2015

Wow, you have experienced so much as a couple. Wonderful to hear that he's remembering things and on the mend. Just being there for each other as a couple is all you need to do for baby. No need to put expectations based on other couples painting and decorating. It sounds like you two will have a loving home and this baby will be a great new chapter. What a great reminder to appreciate life and health and the little things.