FTM Question

cdepperschmidt · May 2015

Please excuse me if this is a dumb question.

However, I keep hearing experienced moms say, "I haven't showered in 4 day" "you don't get the chance to use the bathroom". My question is why? If I really have to go, can't I just put the baby in its seat or carrier right outside the bathroom door and and pee? Also, why would you not shower for 4 days? Unless of course your a single parent with no support or a mama whose husband is deployed or works late hours and you can't leave the baby. I can also see these things becoming challenging with a toddler and and infant.

Is it just that your so busy these things don't happen? What's the deal?

gabrielafrnqyepez · May 2015

Don't let those comments frighten you, I am a stm and I'll tell you if your not showering for 4 days its just cuz ur a bit unorganized ...my rule of thumb was when baby sleeps you sleep, so that takes care if the being tired with that said, babies sleep all day! So I'd nap in the a.m feed him he'd fall back sleep. I'd go shower put him in any safe place crib, sleep and play how ever u feel conftable. Don't get wrong the time you have in shower should b limited because you don't want to leave baby alone for took long but a good shower 10 min ur in your out! By the next time the baby wakes up u fees them they either go back to sleep or you put them in their sleep and play things and you can do chores. But the key point is to use baby sleeping time for things you need to do ...but most importantly if baby is keeping you up at night a lot is sleeping with then.

FrozenMommy · May 2015

Or too tired to care....LOL no. I never had this problem with infants. But when they start moving, yep, it's a problem!!! In fact it's only now at almost 4 and 5 that I can finally trust them not to kill each other while I take a shower.

CocoR04 · May 2015

It was so easy showering with a newborn and a non mobile baby. DS would sit in a bouncer while I could see him from the shower. These days, I have to wait til DH comes home because he's 2 and into everything. It's annoying because I work out in mid morning. However, I've come to terms with my sweaty hair and wear hats.

I will say that having a newborn who wants to eat all the time, so accomplishing tasks is hard. My DS wanted to nap in my arms, so I didn't do a darn thing but watch Netflix and read for the first couple of months. DH took over house chores.

gabrielafrnqyepez · May 2015

When my kid was an infant od put him in his playpen if I needed to shower, and pull the playpen in front of the door. I'd also just mostly wait till he was sleep at night to shower . I was always very strict about his sleeping patterns he'd be showered fed and tucked in by 7 latest! Wed read a book or sing a song lights off he'd be done for the day! And I must say he is 7 yes old now his bed time just went up an hr so its 8 but same routine dinner, shower, story or review for any test he might have in school and then. Off to bed.

sweet+cheeks · May 2015

In the beginning a newborn eats every 2-3 hours. Some babies can take around 30 minutes to eat in the beginning and then it's burping and diaper changes and attempting to get them back to sleep. You have to fit all of your other daily activities: eating, going to the bathroom, keeping up with laundry and basic housework in the remaining 1-2.5 hours. This cycle continues 24/7 so you are also only sleeping in spurts when you can get it. Frankly bathing and personal hygiene are on the back burner in the beginning and eating/sleeping when you can become the top priority.

deanna1313 · May 2015

I never went 4 days, but it wasn't on the top of my list. You need to eat, sleep, clean up and the baby is demanding your attention constantly.
My son was breastfed and there were times where he'd want to eat every1-2 hours. I don't understand how people say they couldn't pee. It's a lot harder than you can imagine in the beginning, but some people do exaggerate a bit.

FrozenMommy · May 2015

LOL I would let the baby cry for a min so I could pee. Sheesh!

alhittner · May 2015

It is hard to adjust to a new schedule with a newborn but showering is a pretty essential daily chore. I always put the baby in his crib or swing and tried to take one while he was sleeping. There is time, you just have to make it a priority. At first I found it difficult to get housework done with a tiny baby also but I discovered that the Moby was awesome for helping out with that. It freed my hands and still made him comfortable by being close to me

AshleeM7784 · May 2015

It can be really challenging to fit in time for yourself with a newborn. My son was colicky for the first few months and NEVER slept. Some people say babies sleep all the time but that was certainly not the case for my baby. He would only sleep for about 10 mins at a time if he was not in my arms so "sleep when the baby sleeps" was not an option. That was my time to pee, grab a bite to eat, change my clothes, brush my teeth, etc. That said, he really liked the sound of the running water so he was usually happy to lay on a blanket in the bathroom rug while I took a quick shower.

He's 15 mos now and naps/sleeps like a champ so it's much easier.

cjvisona · May 2015

You'll see.... I thought the same thing but with my 15 month old. There are days I don't shower. You say you'll do it when they nap but then get sucked into other chores and by the time you know it, baby is awake! Then after dinner and when the baby is tucked in, I just crash too and the shower never happened!

smlowe9311 · May 2015

deanna1313 said:
I never went 4 days, but it wasn't on the top of my list. You need to eat, sleep, clean up and the baby is demanding your attention constantly.
My son was breastfed and there were times where he'd want to eat every1-2 hours. I don't understand how people say they couldn't pee. It's a lot harder than you can imagine in the beginning, but some people do exaggerate a bit.

This. Also with dd is was hard because she was our first. Dh and I both struggled with him stepping in to do stuff. When he would try he would get flustered and want to give up and at the same time seeing both their frustration I would step in instead of letting them figure each other out. Now dd only wants mommy to do things for her although she is getting better about it.

cdepperschmidt · May 2015

Thank you ladies for your responses!

thebabyA · May 2015

I didn't have a problem with not being able to shower and take care of myself. But I also had a good baby. Ya I didn't understand those peoples comments. I also washed up with my baby. Obviously not as a newborn. But it was nice to get us both washed up in one shot. And my baby loved it!!!

amberrmariee20 · May 2015

I never had a problem showering, however my son is almost 4 now and while I'm in the shower sometimes he sneaks in cause he loves the shower !!

Telebell · May 2015

Yeah never had a problem showering or peeing whenever I needed/wanted either. When dd was really little I'd just have her a bouncy seat in the bathroom. When dd got more mobile I'd put her in her crib with some favorite things and toys or music. For a while she'd panic and cry if I showered (you disappear behind a curtain! What if you never reappear??!!). But that phase ended after a month or so. Even then I'd just talk to her and try to take a short shower. She'd cry on the bathroom floor.

tate62610 · May 2015

I've never had a problem getting the time to pee lol the longest I went without showering was after my c-section. That was about 4 days and only because I couldn't bring myself to expose my incision. I was scared of it, I guess. Anyways, don't listen to stuff like that. I shower regularly and use the restroom whenever I need to. Sometimes my daughter joins me lol

nrocke129 · May 2015

The bathroom thing is more than likely with toddlers. When they follow you everywhere or you want to make sure they haven't figured out the latest safety latch on the Tupperware cupboard. My daughter is 6 and I am barely in the habit of closing the bathroom door. She was like my shadow for years and the closed door would cause crying. Don't be afraid of all the changes a new baby brings embrace them and you will adjust much better.

Sbrouwer0706 · May 2015

I am also a FTM but I was a nanny for my nephew from 3 mo-almost 2 years. I would shower with him in his bouncer and I would leave the door open and leave him right outside the door. The way the bathroom was I could see him the whole time. As for going to the bathroom it was always easy until he started walking. Most of the time he would just end up in the bathroom with me. It definitely feels like a lack of privacy sometimes but it's totally do-able. I plan on taking advantage of the time my husband is home or family members are over to take a longer, private shower but just taking a shower itself isn't difficult.

Want a personalized experience?

FTM Question

Re: FTM Question

Choose Another Board

Search Boards