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Tubal Reversal then chemical pregnancy... what a cruel joke!!!

Kimc312Kimc312 member
in Trying to Get Pregnant

Newbie Alert!!  I've been lurking for a while and decided to ask for support.  I'm 35, had a TR in Sept of last year.  Been married to my DH for 8 years.  We've been TTC since November but with his work schedule we only get to try every other month ( he works away for a month and is home the next month).  I have been reading forums for a while and see the toll TTC can put on a marriage. I promised myself I wouldn't chart, symptom spot, test every day until AF arrives.  Well yea that didn't work out so well.  I did all of those things I promised myself I wouldn't do.  My periods have never been regular, ranging from 29 to 35 days so I never really know when is "too early" to test.  I did start using OPK's last month so I know when I O'd and tested the day before AF was due, the day of and the day after.  All BFN's.  When 2 more days went by and still nothing I tested again and got a faint line!  We were so excited!  DH left for work that same morning on cloud 9.  The very next day literally 24 hours to the minute AF showed her ugly head.  I saw my OB that day and did a PT and it was a BFN.  He said this is a good sign, that my tubes are open and pregnancy is possible.  He also said my next cycle could be a bit wonky but to try as soon as DH got home from work (in a month).  My fear is it got stuck in my tube and since DH will only be home when I O on that side it will happen again.  I was symptom spotting the whole month and did notice a small twinge of pain immediately following O that lasted until 5 days before AF showed.  I'm probably being paranoid combined with fear, confusion and sadness that I even tested that day.  I wish I wouldn't have known.  AF was extremely short and light like my OB said it probably would be so I know I should listen to him and suck it up but it's hard.  Any other ladies out there that have had a TR or similar experience? 


Side Note:  I've been taking Clomid 50mg only the months DH is home.  This month he has decided to give me Provera 10mg to make me start earlier since our time is limited with DH schedule.  Is it true you can only take Clomid for 6 cycles?  Like I said before I only take it every other month.  I was upset at my last appointment and forgot to ask. 


Thanks ladies for not crucifying the newbie :)

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Re: Tubal Reversal then chemical pregnancy... what a cruel joke!!!

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  • concreteayngelconcreteayngel member
    I'm sorry for your loss.

    That being said, if you have lurked as you said you have, you'd know that symptom spotting isn't something we do a lot of here. Secondly,
    You would also know that OPKs cannot tell you when you ovulate, only temping can. OPKS tells you when you are having an LH surge that often times mean O is imminent, but it cannot confirm that it actually happened. You can also have more than one LH in one cycle, but you'll only O once (or not at all).

    Also, it's normal for periods to vary by a few days each month. Between 29-35 sounds like a normal spread to me. Many women on here have 50, 60, 70 day cycles. That is more what is meant by "irregular."

    I'm not really sure why you'd think that taking extra measures to conceive (by charting and temping and testing) would make you think that that puts stress on a marriage. Maybe expensive IF treatments do, but in my experience, temping and charting has made me LESS crazy and baby brained because it gives me some of the control back out of a powerless situation.

    If I was on the threshold of "advanced maternal age" and all the potential complications that come with it, and my husband missed half of my fertile windows, I'd be doing everything I possibly could to get pregnant, especially temping. Do yourself a big favor and go on Amazon and buy a BBT, order the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility, and get the Fertility Friend app.

    You also mentioned Clomid. Yes, only 6 times in a lifetime, and from what I've learned on here about it is that you should be getting it from an RE that closely monitors you, not an OB, because OBs specialize in babies, not in infertility. Clomid can really screw up your fertility if not properly monitored.

    Sorry for the novel, hope this helps. Best of luck.
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  • concreteayngelconcreteayngel member
    Ha,sorry for the repeated responses. Was answering at the same time as @tigerfish227
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  • sweetpoetsweetpoet member
    Hi there--just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss. I second PP's recommendation to temp in order to confirm O. At first, I felt that temping might amp up obsessive feelings and create more emotional distress, but I've found it actually calms me and helps me to be confident that I know what's happening when, whether our timing was good or not, and (as you say) when it is a good time to test. Once you get into the habit, it's quite easy and can't help to temper the emotional roller coaster of TTC. Good luck to you!!
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  • Kimc312Kimc312 member

    Crucifixion.... CHECK!!!   Making notes:  I do have a regular period, I AM old, do NOT admit symptom spotting, add in bio I am charting BBT, drive to closest RE which is 3 hours from home, extra measures do not make me think I'm driving myself crazy.  Ok got it! 

    Thanks for your input.  I appreciate it. 

    I was really hoping for some success stories for support! 

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  • Kimc312Kimc312 member
    @AshleyD917 Thank you!!
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  • 27alex27alex member
    Kimc312 said:

    Crucifixion.... CHECK!!!   Making notes:  I do have a regular period, I AM old, do NOT admit symptom spotting, add in bio I am charting BBT, drive to closest RE which is 3 hours from home, extra measures do not make me think I'm driving myself crazy.  Ok got it! 

    Thanks for your input.  I appreciate it. 

    I was really hoping for some success stories for support! 

    Unfortunately, others success means nothing for you because your body is yours and yours alone.

    Also, OPKs are not reliable during a Clomid cycle. You should be using the temping in conjunction with ultrasounds and bloodwork through your doctor to confirm ovulation.
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  • Kimc312Kimc312 member
    Is it really so bad to want to be excited for someone else that experienced the same things as I did but was successful??  Hope is a very strong emotion.  I would like to think that women here are still hopeful and hearing about other peoples triumphs instill more hope for all of us TTC.  I love hearing and being excited for all moms who went through the motions, failed, and kept trying.  Never gave up hope and yet still were able to be excited for others when they were successful.
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  • 27alex27alex member
    Kimc312 said:

    Is it really so bad to want to be excited for someone else that experienced the same things as I did but was successful??  Hope is a very strong emotion.  I would like to think that women here are still hopeful and hearing about other peoples triumphs instill more hope for all of us TTC.  I love hearing and being excited for all moms who went through the motions, failed, and kept trying.  Never gave up hope and yet still were able to be excited for others when they were successful.

    No there's nothing wrong with it. We don't encourage that here because at the end of the day, just because someone got pregnant 3 cycles after their reversal doesn't mean you will.

    I know you said you lurked, but maybe lurk and little more and read "if you could tell a newbie anything". It's the first post on this board. I think you'd benefit from reading it. Also, there's nothing wrong with this board not having the flow you're looking for.
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  • PrimRoseMamaPrimRoseMama member
    Kimc312 said:

    Crucifixion.... CHECK!!!   Making notes:  I do have a regular period, I AM old, do NOT admit symptom spotting, add in bio I am charting BBT, drive to closest RE which is 3 hours from home, extra measures do not make me think I'm driving myself crazy.  Ok got it! 

    Thanks for your input.  I appreciate it. 

    I was really hoping for some success stories for support! 

    First, I'm sorry for your loss.

    Second, Wait what? No one else's "success story" would make any rational difference for you though. We don't live in your body.

    I don't think you are being very fair, respectful or kind to the women that took time to respond to you.


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  • PrimRoseMamaPrimRoseMama member
    Kimc312 said:

    Is it really so bad to want to be excited for someone else that experienced the same things as I did but was successful??  Hope is a very strong emotion.  I would like to think that women here are still hopeful and hearing about other peoples triumphs instill more hope for all of us TTC.  I love hearing and being excited for all moms who went through the motions, failed, and kept trying.  Never gave up hope and yet still were able to be excited for others when they were successful.

    Hope isn't bad, but you are looking for irrational methods to bolster your hopes. That's not wise or fair to yourself.


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  • janeyintroublejaneyintrouble member
    I'll add just one other note to what everyone else has said. You mentioned worrying that you only ovulate "on that side" when your H is home. A lot of women believe that you alternate sides each month, but that's not always the case.
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