Second time or more, moms come in!

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

Okay so I talked to my pediatrician about this but I just don't agree with his opinion on it.

So my daughter is 18 months old and I've set a pretty good schedule for her. Well she has always been a baby that has to be held to sleep or rocked. Which i never really cared about until recently. We spend at least two hours at nap and bed time to get her to sleep. I'm exhausted of this fight every single day.

My pediatrician just said to do the cry it out method but I have never believed in letting them cry it out like that. Any one else have any ideas or tips to get her to go to bed easier and on her own? I'm running out of patience and especially having a new born coming within two weeks.

bean8213 · May 2015

Honestly, I would cry it out too. She's old enough to know that you'll be back to get her and that you aren't disappearing forever.

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

Ah I'm such a sucker for her though. It makes me sad when she cries but goodness I just can't take wasting four hours of my day every single day getting her to stop fighting sleep. I see other kids her age just go to sleep no issues but mine fights and fights and fights me about it.

LadyBlood · May 2015

I don't have any kids yet, but maybe do a combination to start. Slowly decrease the amount of time you hold and rock her when putting her to bed and if she cries just let her cry it out rather than responding. But it should be easier on her if you don't just quit cold turkey, especially since you don't want her resenting the baby who will be held and she is just suddenly not getting held before sleep. Just my opinion though, clearly I have no experience. Hope it works out for you

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

Yeah I don't want her resenting the baby and I mean she is still a baby to me in a form so It's not that I don't want to rock her. I really don't mind rocking her to sleep because she's still young and needs love and attention and that's when she likes it but I can't handle the fight that comes with and me having to hold her super tight and make her sit in my lap until she falls asleep.

bean8213 · May 2015

What time does she nap and go to bed? Will she maybe go to sleep faster if you start the nap routine closer to the time she usually actually falls asleep?

For the record, I was terrified to cry it out with my kid. It actually went a lot more smoothly than I could have ever hoped. She cried for maybe 45 minutes the first and second night (with frequent checks where I told her it was time to sleep and that I was still there), down to 15 the third night, and never a problem again. We do have random days when she doesn't want to nap and cries, but that usually only happens when she is overtired.

katiebug66 · May 2015

You are not going to have time to do it when the newborn gets here so you might as well work on it now.

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

She usually wakes up around 6:30 and then sleeps by 1:30 and then wakes up about 3 and then sleeps at night by 9 or 10. She gets tired for naps about 12 but we spend that extra time fighting her to sleep.

BabyBelleCz · May 2015

You just have to let her cry. It feels terrible but its worse for you than her. You are worried, she isnt. I had the hardest time with this, but your baby is plenty old enough to do this and it will be over after only a couple times. Just dont give in once you start or youll get to start over ans send mixed messages. Dont worry, she is totally ok.

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

I will definitely give it a try because I'm losing patience with her sleeping habits and the fighting. I don't even get to enjoy spending time with my fiancé because he gets off work at 7 and one of us spends time fighting her to sleep for two hours and by then the other one sleeps. And he's gone before we wake the next day. It's exhausting and definitely putting a damper on us because we're both frustrated and tired and never get "parent" time.

manacita · May 2015

What is her sleep environment like? Both of my kids, 36 and 16 months, get to go to bed with a glow bug night light, as many books as they want, and a comfy blanket. Plus they have a white noise machine on a 20 minute timer. By the time they get all their sleep goodies gathered up, I don't think they care at all if I am there.

That said, we had to rock ds until a year and then did some cry-it-out with both kids right at a year. It took 3-4 nights, but ended up just fine. Everyone goes to sleep just fine now.

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

She has her blankets and her glo bug night light and her teddy that plays lullabys to her but other than that she just plays. I even tried shutting off the light and doing just dark and she still gets up and plays in the dark. She never gives up.

stark01938209 · May 2015

ALITAYLOR23 said:
She has her blankets and her glo bug night light and her teddy that plays lullabys to her but other than that she just plays. I even tried shutting off the light and doing just dark and she still gets up and plays in the dark. She never gives up.

If she isn't upset- it's not crying it out anyway. A little independence is good. She would eventually go to sleep. I swear!

jennygirlmt · May 2015

I'm pretty anti cry it out but I just had to do something bc bedtime with my 2.5 year old got crazy and was taking an hour and a half of rocking and singing.

I just set it in stone, 3 books, 3 songs while we rock then I lay her down and leave.

Granted she plays in her crib for an hour before falling asleep at nap time so I know she can do it and enjoys her crib.

She cried for 5 mins the first night, 2 the second and now not really at all.

While I will never agree with doing it at 6 months (but to each their own, I spent 16 months of each of my kids' lives a zombie from lack of sleep so maybe I'm the crazy one). I do think that an 18 month old will be able to handle this and understand that you aren't gone.

Also, I wonder if she's overtired. I know all kids are different but that doesn't sound like much sleep for a child that age. If you get her going to sleep earlier you might find it all spirals into more sleep.

Good luck! Sleep is where I fail as a a parent. I'm hoping that baby 3 knows what drowsy but awake is since I apparently don't

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

Yeah she has never really been a big sleeper. At 6 months she quit naps in general until I started makin her take them again because she would go to bed for the night at 2 in the afternoon and wake up around 12. It got ridiculous so now I make her nap. She has fought sleep since the day she's been born but it's so much worse lately and I can't take it. I'm going to try tonight for the cry it out a little bit and see how she does because I don't want this fight to continue when the new baby comes too.

JenGrl8503 · May 2015

I've done a modified cry it out with both of my kids so far. My oldest was a great sleeper who had a huge setback after a ton of back to back travel when she was about 10 months old....in less than 2 weeks she was back to her usual sleep habits. My second was 18 months and quit wanting to middle of the night nurse but wanted to wake up and cry anyway...in less than a week she was over it.

The biggest thing that stands out to me is your little one's schedule...my 2 yr old wakes up around 7:15am and naps at 11:30am. Wakes up between 2-2:30pm then is in bed at 7:30pm. At both 11:30am and 7:30pm she is not yet yawning or fussy but she goes to sleep like a champ. If we miss our sleep window by more than about 30 minutes though she is yawning and fussy and will cry in her crib for 5-10 minutes before she falls asleep. My best guess would be try earlier nap and bed times.

Good luck!!!!

lyefimova · May 2015

I used a bouncy chair with my daughter and manually rocked her from the back of chair so that she doesn't see me. Then at about 11 months I let her cry it out. It's hard but only took us three night. After that it was cool. She would practice sounding out different words and after nap be all smiles and tell me which word she learned.

jmorneau09 · May 2015

Crying it out is hard at first but it really only takes a week at most for most kiddos. We were the parents that many people disagree with because we let our son cry it out well before 6 months. It took him two nights. Between that and a very on-point sleep and eat schedule he is now 5 and bed time is never ever a problem. He has his nightly routine and it just is what it is. It takes him all of 5 min to fall asleep once lights are out.
It's hard but you can do it and it will make life a whole lot easier once baby arrives. Even if you sit outside his room and cry yourself it will be okay. You can do this mommy!

trishadobel · May 2015

We did the same with my son, at 6 months we let him cry it out. My MIL (whom I adore) was in town and helped keep us sane while he cried. Took 2 or 3 nights each one getting better and it was all done. We never have had any bed times issues since 6 months and our bedtime routine was less then 20 minutes for naps and bed time. Now that my son is 7 bed is even easier, he is an awesome sleeper and some nights will want to go to bed early.

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

It sounds like the cry it out route is the best way because I'm still fighting my daughter trying new methods!

mhilpisch10 · May 2015

We did the cry it out method early on and now he sometimes crawls up to his crib and points in it at nap time. he's 14 months now. As soon as he rubs his eyes I lay him right down with his nasty blankie and he falls right asleep. evenings he sometimes cries for a few minutes but I seriously can't imagine rocking him for 4 hours every day. How do you get anything done? That is precious time! I don't envy you starting this at 18 months. Good luck. And I think if you are going to do it, like PP said, don't be wishy washy. You can't cave otherwise it's just going to be confusing for her.

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

Yes absolutely. I waste a good four hours sometimes more fighting her to sleep when I could be doing other things and I'm just not going to have time to fight her when the new baby is here and needs held and fed too within those two hours each time she fights sleep!

ALITAYLOR23 · May 2015

Well guys tonight was our first night and it took 48 minutes for her to finally give up. What an exhausting thing. This next baby is getting it earlier than 18 months!

trishadobel · May 2015

48 horrible minutes I am sure! But that is 72 minutes of time you have back not rocking and hopefully it will be easier each time!! Good luck and stay strong!!

jmorneau09 · May 2015

ALITAYLOR23 said:
Well guys tonight was our first night and it took 48 minutes for her to finally give up. What an exhausting thing. This next baby is getting it earlier than 18 months!

Good job mommy. It will get easier. I promise!

n_delia_g · May 2015

Look into getting The Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg. Crying it out will break the trust between you and your daughter. Her third book is best, it helps answer questions for parents. It will help immensely!!!

bean8213 · May 2015

48 minutes isn't bad! I hope it works even more quickly for you tonight!

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