Community› The Bump Month Clubs› April 2015 Moms
April 2015 Moms
New Discussion

panic attacks at thought of going back to work

KSGCJTKSGCJT member
in April 2015 Moms
My LO is 5 weeks, next week I go for my 6 week check with my ob.  She will be determining if I go back to work on June 1 or not.  I have been having panic attacks at the thought of going back to work and leaving my son.  I am a teacher in an inner city district. I actually had to start my maternity leave early due to the stress of my job. Luckily my DH will be home with LO and I know he is perfectly capable of taking care of LO.  I just panic at the thought of not being with LO at this stage.  He is still so little.  If I can stay home with him until September he will be 5 months.  I just feel that both LO and I will be more ready then.  Right now he is so dependent on me.  

How can I express my emotional state/feelings to my dr without making her think I am nuts (Just kidding, but you get the point)?  
Report Reply to Post

Re: panic attacks at thought of going back to work

  • lshearer22lshearer22 member
    I'm in the same boat, my little one will be 6 weeks thursday, and I go in Friday morning to determine if I go back to work this Monday or the following monday. I didn't qualify for paid leave so I have to return to work as soon as I'm able. Luckily my grandmother is able to watch her. And between my husband and I's work schedule (he works evenings 2-11, while i work till at the latest 6) there's only a few hours that we need a sitter. But the thought of me being away and not there for my little girl just sets me into a panic attack. In order to help me get over the panic, i try to take little breaks away and leave her alone with my husband for short periods of time, like go and take a long shower, run into town, catch some extra sleep. Nothing more than two hours though.... so it's not like returning to work but atleast it's a step...
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • shrkfanshrkfan member
    I don't know if laws are the same in all states but in CA your doctor can write you on short term disability for emotional stress... Good luck!! I'm sure it's gotta be so hard leaving them when they are so little
    Report Reply
  • erikaluna01erikaluna01 member
    Do you have summer off? I'm a teacher Too. With my first, I intentionally returned to work 2 weeks before winter vacation to get a break soon after I returned. While it was hard, I'm glad I got to look forward to it the entire time.

    No matter when you return, you'll probably still feel sad. It's not easy to leave your baby. It's likely that you won't think it's as bad as you imagined.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • vansmommyvansmommy member
    I go back at the end of June and I am having panic attacks about it too I think that means your normal. You'll always worry about your kid . No matter how old they are I don't think your ever ready to leave them
    Report Reply
  • jennaspo6788jennaspo6788 member
    I'm in the same boat- I go back to work mid June, and I can't stand the thought of being away from my son 8 hours a day. This may sound silly but I don't want him to forget who I am or get unattached to me. Luckily my mother works from home and will be watching him, but I am worried\nervous he will start to prefer my mom over me or start to think that she is his mom. I know its silly but it upsets me. Anyone else have this fear?
    Report Reply
  • gittybabygittybaby member
    Going back at the end of June and the thought of dropping her at daycare brings tears to my eyes. I hate to think that she would feel like I abandoned her, and that our daycare lady will get more time with her every day than I will. I just tell myself that my mom put me in daycare when I was a baby, and it changed nothing about our relationship. I couldn't remember the names or faces of my daycare ladies for the life of me, but I remember my mother.
    Report Reply
  • KSGCJTKSGCJT member
    On top of dreading being away from my son, I have been struggling with my milk production.  I am lucky if I can give him 2 ounces a week of breast milk.  I go to a support group once a week to work with a lactation consultant, and hand express every 2-3 hours for 45 mins a day.  When I go back to work, all of my work will be for nothing.  My production will dry up and I will never get it back.  The fact I can't breastfeed my baby has been an extraordinarily hard thing for me to accept, to not be able to give him breast milk is pushing me over the edge.  I have been to my dr and she sent me to a therapist.  All of my stress is based on my going back to work, and the only appointment they could get me is after school lets out for the summer.  I am a teacher.  If that is when they can get me therapy, it is a waste of time because I will have already lost my milk production and been away from my baby.  I am at a loss. I am so depressed and cry daily and I have a week before I go back to work.  
    Report Reply
  • kimalatokimalato member
    I'm so sorry that your suffering like that. It's not your fault, I know you love the LO so much and the LO knows that.
    Report Reply
  • Freckles825Freckles825 member
    I know exactly how you feel! I'm a second grade teacher and I'm returning on the 15th. Even though I'm only going to be working for two weeks I have such anxiety leaving my little girl! My mom will be watching her which gives me some peace but I feel guilty that I have to leave her
    Report Reply
  • Babybean2211Babybean2211 member
    I have the exact same problems as well. I am also a teacher but I have made a decision to go back as a per Diem sub instead as a full time teacher so I can have time with my son and make some money. The truth is I don't know how long I can do this financially and I have anxiety thinking about eventually returning to work full time. I also had difficulty Breast feeding and at most get a half an ounce on each Breast. I have just recently tried to accept that I'm doing the best I can and it is what it is. My son got whatever Breast milk I could give him for 2 months which isn't great but better than nothing. I had a lot of complications so I guess I should be happy I was able to get any Breast milk. At this point he is mainly on formula because of how little milk I produce and how much he is eating now. We love our babies and we are our own worst enemy sometimes. I feel your pain though about having to leave work early teaching in the city due to stress etc that was me last year teaching in the Bronx. Best wishes to everyone.
    Report Reply
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"