Suicidal...

jdiZzleeee · May 2015

I'm 40 + 6 weeks, I've been generally happier throughout pregnancy. The last week or so my mood has absolutely plummeted to rock bottom... If I walk into town I feel like EVERYONE hates me... I DONT fit in anywhere. I feel like my partner doesn't even want to be with me, feel like he's only staying because of our baby being born and will probably leave afterwards. He's really grumpy. And I'm finding it hard to even recognise my own families faces... I know who they are but can't link the face to the person :-'( I'm at rock bottom and having to deal with the fact I'm going to give birth soon which I'm terrified of as I'm sure most of you are too. It's all too much and obviously I wouldn't do anything to harm myself right now as it would also harm my baby.... But I'm so worried that when he's born it will all be too much and I'll slip back into self harming. I've never felt like this, I've never been so completely insecure and disgusted by myself, never been so depressed. I feel like there is no way out.. No way at all. And I might lose my partner because I don't feel he wants to be with me :-'(

trishadobel · May 2015

Probably time to talk with your doctor.

MrsRucinski85 · May 2015

I am sorry you are dealing with these feelings; being pregnant and giving birth are both very stressful things. I really think you need to bring your feelings up to your doctor and work out a plan on how you're going to deal with your feeling now and after baby is here

ashleymartie13 · May 2015

know that they're are women for you to talk to on here! I'm sorry you're feeling that way. please talk to your doctor about this.

MrsWhiteToBe · May 2015

Don't wait to call your dr! Call someone immediately! This is serious. You are worth more than the way you feel.

I've struggled with mental illness all my life, and what you're saying about not recognizing family members faces and wanting to self harm sounds familiar and alarming. It doesn't mean you're crazy, but it's not something you should take lightly either. Pm me if you want to. If I don't respond I just don't know how to but I'll still try to. But get help from someone! You don't deserve to feel like this.

MegsB1112 · May 2015

Please call your doctor asap! You are worth so much more than you will ever realize and you'll soon have a new little one that will love you and need you more than ever. You can do this, but you'll need help, and that's ok. Call your doctor!! Lots of love being sent your way!

hannahhassonn · May 2015

First of all, happy mothers day! You are a mother and a champ and you've made it so far. Be proud of yourself. Due to circumstances outside your control, it sounds like all your emotions are out of whack and you're passing through a dark valley. Like the other posters are saying... don't try to walk it alone! Lets get you hooked up with a pregnancy and post partum counselor!!! I'm sure your clinic has a great list and can even get it covered by insurance. Also, maybe consider having your placenta encapsulated. It has proven very helpful for moms suffering from post partum depression. I don't know if you are a woman of faith, but I am. I'll pray that God surrounds you with his angels and protects you and your little one. Be at peace. Xoxo

khaleesi123 · May 2015

I suggest you speak to your doctor ASAP as you may get post natal depression after giving birth and as you already have depression and suicidal thoughts it can only get worst if you don't speak to someone now. I hope the best for you just please speak to someone sometimes that's all it takes

odawg · May 2015

Here is to hoping you get the help you need and that it all goes away ones your lo is born! Hormones can be very overpowering. From someone who lost a very close relative to suicide i promise people love you. Some individuals just at times only focus on the bad and think that is our whole life. Its not. There is so much more to you and so many people that care for you then what is mentioned in this post.

CateOfChicago · May 2015

I'm sorry you are going through this. It is a lot of change on our bodies and with our lives. Please talk to a professional Asap. They will help. I promise.

nursej519 · May 2015

Please please please seek help.

Miriah&Baby · May 2015

You have done an incredible job of providing for your little one these last 10 months. That little guy needs you and is depending on you to stay strong and keep him safe. The minute you meet him, life will suddenly have a new added purpose. You are the only person in this world who can love him so completely. Don't give up, he needs and loves you so. Pregnancy is hard enough on its own, I am so sorry you have this to deal with as well. Stay strong and please talk about how you're feeling with a loved one or doctor. Praying for you, sweet girl!

ryemo · May 2015

As someone who has had severe PPD, you need to do more than call your doctor. My experience was that, when I asked for help, my doctor was extremely baffled and said I needed to find a psychiatrist (which was an overwhelming and expensive task). Tell your husband what you're feeling (show him this post) and have him go to the doctor with you. Demand to be seen TODAY and demand SSRIs (Zoloft is the first choice for BFing and very safe). Tell your husband not to let the doctor downplay what you're feeling.

kjeromeo · May 2015

Sending love your way. You're already an incredible mother, and other people's feelings about you, whether real or perceived, don't define who you are. That includes your partner. You're little one is counting on you to be a loving provider, and you're absolutely up to the task. Talk to your doctor and get the support you need. You're not alone is this.

jdiZzleeee · May 2015

Thank you all so much these posts really helped. I'm going to get some help and hopefully go onto some tablets before it spirals out of control. Thank you again, for being there and just for your advice in general it really shows there are a lot of kind selfless people in the world. Makes me smile that this many people who've never even met me have taken the time to write these. Thank you

:x

ashleymartie13 · May 2015

hope you get it taken care of soon and hope your feeling better soon as well

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