When You See a Hand Coming Toward Your Blump

chadsfiance · May 2015

We went to a friend's house Saturday and my cousin and his wife were there too. When my cousin came up to me to, what I thought was just give me a hug, I saw his big man-hand facing palm out and waist-high and I thought for a brief second, "he knows we're only 11 weeks and there's no way he's going to touch my belly" but before I could get my thought all the way out, his hand landed. Yep, right on the blump. It was like slow motion. Then, he HELD IT THERE for several seconds. Now, I'm a girl who doesn't like to be touched much by people other than a select few (other than hugs and simple things like that), and I realize I will have to somehow deal with random people wanting to touch the babies in my belly, but I never expected it to happen before I'm even showing. I'm still weirded out by such an unexpected, intimate gesture.

Shouldn't people ask or something before palming your stomach?

VexyMommy · May 2015

They absolutely should ask, but they won't always. You could always try grabbing their belly and holding your hand there. If they ask what you're doing, you can say you thought this was how he/she preferred to greet people.

Laurakat81 · May 2015

I've only had this happen once. Also when I was by no means showing and to make it worse it was my first day back at work after my second miscarriage. Idiot. I burst into tears and said my baby was dead. She was horrified. But hopefully she will quit touching bellies without permission. But when I was pregnant with my DD no one touched me without asking. So I never had to worry about what to say!

newmanmini · May 2015

That is awful and I would feel just as uncomfortable. My husband and I are announcing our pregnancy at a BBQ we are having in a few weeks and I have been so worried about people trying to touch my belly. I'll be 13 weeks so I likely will still not be showing at all. So my friend sent me a link to a t-shirt that says "I'm pregnant, not a petting zoo" that I am totally going to get and wear to my party so people know to keep their grubby mitts off me.

thegingeravenger · May 2015

I think my standard response is going to be "are you effing kidding me right now?" Since I also HATE being touched by people I don't know well. I might be called rude, but I really don't care.

segorman17 · May 2015

This has happened to me 5 times so far, (yep I'm counting). Each time I hate it more than the last. And everything time it happens I don't see it coming, (bc no one should be touching me like that without permission) and I reflexively flinch away. First it was DH's grandmother and I let it slide. Other than that it has been work friends and I have since made it very well known I don't want to be touched. When there's something big enough in there to be felt, I will invite you to touch it. Until then, back the eff up. Lord help the stranger that tries to touch my bump... They'll be lucky to leave with their arm still intact.

Falchas · May 2015

Yes, people should definitely ask. I always do, and honestly, the only people's bellies I really am interested in are very close friends and family. Works both way, why would someone you're not close to want to touching a belly? Weirdos. Hasn't happened to me yet, but last pregnancy we made our announcement to extended family around Christmas. I have a lot of aunts whom I'm very close to and they all rushed over to start rubbing my belly. I had to laugh, as the only thing they could possibly be feeling was the massive plate of chicken parm I had just inhaled.

Shellie123 · May 2015

Omg I would have ripped his face off! I feel really insecure about my chubby belly at the moment and would go nuts if someone tried to feel me up like that, how rude!!

lvbyrd · May 2015

I have experienced this a few times already! The first time I didn't know how to feel but I was not offended at all. Having experienced loss and this being a healthy pregnancy I am welcoming all the love being showed to this baby. It's a little awkward but I am happy that everyone else in my life can be excited about my little miracle with me.

VexyMommy · May 2015

I've got to admit I like it when my daughter does it or when she kisses Sprout good night. I don't mind those unsolicited belly rubs. Everyone else though can back off.

JLW0504 · May 2015

I used to swat their hands away, but now I touch their belly and when they ask me what I'm doing, I say, "I thought today was touchy belly day"

ash413 · May 2015

I may be in the minority here, but I have absolutely not problem telling someone nit to touch me. I don't care if I come across as a bitch. You wouldn't be toughing me if you did not know I was pregnant, being pregnant does not mean I no longer have personal space. Keep your hands to yourself.

Kern91 · May 2015

This hasn't happened to me with both of my previous pregnancies..I would feel awkward cause I'm not even a hugger. Just wait until baby is born and u have complete strangers try and touch them! I had that happen I damn right almost smacked a women's hand for trying to touch without asking!

aproulx725 · May 2015

Happened to me a couple times already. The first time was my teenage niece. I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't showing yet cause she was so excited. The second time was my step mom and I responded by saying "yup that's just fat, no baby yet" she was embarrassed to say the least.

I just don't understand why anyone would do that, especially without there being a definite bump!

VexyMommy · May 2015

Kern91 said:
This hasn't happened to me with both of my previous pregnancies..I would feel awkward cause I'm not even a hugger. Just wait until baby is born and u have complete strangers try and touch them! I had that happen I damn right almost smacked a women's hand for trying to touch without asking!

This happened to my bf's ex who had a baby in April. We were at her daughter (my step daughter's) dance class and a little boy came up, flipped up the car seat cover and touched the baby on the face then started to run off. I stopped him and told him he is to never, ever touch a baby without asking the parents first. The bf's ex was just standing there in shock.

cmb1315 · May 2015

My aunt talked to my blimp at 8 weeks. I was like it doesn't even have ears. Da fuq

keke2336 · May 2015

I had all these same things! It's very awkward and uncomfortable. Also annoying lol. Don't really know how to avoid it, but I will google it

Jeenyus · May 2015

I had the strangest thing happen to me this past weekend. I ran into an elderly lady who lives a few houses down from me. I was wearing a jacket, so there was no way to see my blump. She walk up to me, touched my belly, and said "Are you?!?!" with a big smile on her face. I was so in shock my response was "How did you know?", since I've only told immediate family. She responded with "I had a feeling, I knew it would happen this Spring". I haven't told her anything about our struggles/previous losses, so it was so odd that she just seemed to intuitively know.

In her case it didn't upset me, but as I get bigger and random strangers start to do it - watch out! My MIL has tried a couple times, and I just tell her it's not a bump, just fat.

lyankowi · May 2015

I must have a really good resting bitch face because no one tries to touch me I have a coworker ask if I'm showing yet and I said nope just fat so far.

cfletch88 · May 2015

I'm 12 weeks. We told our family today at an early Mother's Day lunch (early for scheduling issues). The first thing my Grandmother did was touch/rub my stomach. I love my Grandma, but I pushed her hand away and just laughed it off saying "Nothing to feel there". I know this is going to be a constant issue from now on. I feel like a bitch, especially with my family. But seriously...if you didn't put it there, don't touch.

queenwog · May 2015

I live in fear of this and I'm so glad I don't have a blump so I have some time to get ready for the idea of people hiking it's okay to touch my body. I think when I get the chance to tell people there won't be any shower I'll tell them there won't be any belly touching either. It really makes me uncomfortable. I'm a really modest person anyway and the thought of my personal boundaries being ignored just because I'm pregnant really pisses me off. People suck.

I have a feeling my MIL will be the worst offender.

helsbels222 · May 2015

lyankowi said:
I must have a really good resting bitch face because no one tries to touch me I have a coworker ask if I'm showing yet and I said nope just fat so far.

I must need to work on my resting bitch face cause I had one stranger touch my bump when I was pregnant with DS. Thought my RB face was spot on too. This time I'll just start swatting!!

smnewby · May 2015

lyankowi said:
I must have a really good resting bitch face because no one tries to touch me I have a coworker ask if I'm showing yet and I said nope just fat so far.

RBF for the win!

Kitta+1 · May 2015

So far the only one that touches my belly is a special needs girl that is just so excited that I am pregnant I can't bear to burst her bubble with the "no touch!" lol She comes up to me every day, puts her hand on my belly, and says "Yep, I can the feel the baby." lmao I also don't have the heart to be like, "No, you feel fat. That's fat."

Most others don't try to touch. The only ones I give a free pass to are my clients, lol.

kbonel · May 2015

My mil felt my blump and checked to see if my pants were too tight...

cfm90 · May 2015

I have a lady at work who feels the need to yell at my belly to the baby and not quietly like full on screaming... She never talks to me just the belly. It's very odd, she's very odd.

queenwog · May 2015

kbonel said:
My mil felt my blump and checked to see if my pants were too tight...

Omg she didn't.

jscasher · May 2015

My husband's grandma gave me a belly pat at 5 or 6 weeks. I wanted to die.

ashley_k43 · May 2015

I'm 30 years old and my sister is only 10. I'm 12 weeks pregnant and she always tickles my stomach ughhhh trying not to be mean but I hate it!

emmybean123 · May 2015

I don't think I'll mind my relatives doing it. I try so hard with my in laws that if my mil started I would take it as FINALLY, something not negative. I mean... I think my husbands older sisters and their partners would have the sense to know that's a bit weird I hope, although with an invite to feel a kick I won't mind his sisters having a touch, but his younger sister (13) and my younger sister the same age I'll be more than happy. But I do honestly think they'll wait until it's a bump and possibly I invite them cus it's kicking... My mum I won't mind either but again I just think that she would wait until I say it's ok. Men are different.... My husband of course can touch and kiss baby whenever he wants, he's already able to notice the very small bloated bump I have and he finds it incredible. But we are his, it's different and lovely. My fil wouldn't ever put his hands near me haha, a hug is as far as it would ever go, and although I love my stepdad i think I only hugged him on my wedding day! My brother will probably be invited to feel a kick and same with my dad but other than a few women at church I don't think I know many people brash enough to try and touch me up in public uninvited! Although now I think about it... There are a few women at my church that I can imagine having to face an awkward conversation where their hands just seem to be resting on the wrong place! Hope not. But at the moment with my extreme MS causing bed rest and hospital visits I'll be greatful to swap the sickness for as many uninvited hands as you can give me

x

oliarnmom1517 · May 2015

I am ok with relatives doing it but I bought a shirt for when I get big that says if you didn't put it there don't touch it...I plan on getting it in several colors

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