TTC After a Loss

Pure jealousy

Anyone else notice how pregnant everyone seems to be? Or how you see nothing but babies on social media? It's hard. Extremely hard! I'll be the first to admit I'm extremely jealous over everyone pregnant and carrying healthy babies full term. Hope it's my turn next! Anyone else get the same feelings?!

Re: Pure jealousy

  • I feel you. Last week was the hardest for me. I lost my son on January 29th of this year at 18 weeks (completely unexpected to not hear his little heartbeat or see him moving around at our 18 week u/s appointment). I crawled into a little hole and did do much for a couple of days last week because everywhere you go there's pregnant people and little babies. I couldn't watch any of my favorite shows. Going to the store was a pain too. Went to target and every checkout line had a family with a little one and I was (un)lucky enough to be behind the family with the 6 month
  • It's part of loss sadly. ((hugs))
    Me: 24 
    DH: 25
    BFP: 1/12/14       EDD: 9/18/14     MC: 1/15/14
    BFP: 5/6/14         EDD: 1/5/15       MC: 5/10/14
    BFP: 12/29/14      EDD: 9/12/15      MC: 1/5/15
    Dx: PCOS - 8/20/14, Hashimoto's - 10/10/14, Gluten Allergy 10/10/14


    My Chart

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  • I find it difficult as well.  I find church actually the hardest, because there are so many children around and I have time and quiet to think about how much I want one of my own.
    Me: 33, DH: 32  
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Maternity tickers
  • I agree @Charmndmom‌ .. It's rough. I've lost 2 and I don't have any children. I want one so bad I think it brings tears to my eyes everytime I see a pregnant girl or even a child.
  • In with you on this. Baby fever is hard enough without a loss, then factor those in because you can't help think what could have been.... It's killer
  • I try not to be jealous but it's hard to look at someone else and think why not them? Why did it happen to me, etc.
  • Yes! I feel like I have never seen so people people having babies this Spring, although I am sure it just seems that way to me now...  
    MC 10/14 @ 14 WKS 
    MC 1/12 @ 8 WKS
    DS BORN 9/15/09 
  • Good luck to us all. We can finally try again in a couple of weeks and I swear the wait is killing me!! Every morning when I wake up, I say ok another day down. Hope we all get those sticky babies!!
  • I totally understand. Two of my friends from high school gave birth one day apart and their pregnancy has been a journey they shared with everyone. I am happy for them. I think to myself, when will it be me? Another one will be giving birth next week.

    I just have to sit and wait, pray that soon it will be our time.
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  • So much love to you. It took us 2 years to conceive when everyone around us just thought "baby" and popped one out. Now I've lost one and I have to see all those girls just carry on to have happy healthy babies. You have every right in the world to feel the way you do. We are here for you.

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  • I'm visiting these boards because as soon as we can we are going to TTC again.   We just lost our very first on 02/28/15.  I was one day away from being 10 weeks.   The hardest thing for me was going into the doctor's  office the Monday after it happened to get that ultrasound.  There were pregnant bellies everywhere.  I burst into tears.  It is hard when you see everyone (it seems) around you being pregnant.  Frankly, it sucks.


    First Pregnancy
    • BFP: 01/25/2015
    • EDD: 09/28/2015
    • Incomplete MC: 02/28/2015

    Second Pregnancy

    • BFP: 09/11/2015
    • EDD: 05/25/2016
    Baby Born
    04/15/2016



    PGAL
  • I feel your pain! My husbands cousin (young and partied through her first pregnancy, causing delays in her son) got pregnant again. I am also a teacher of High Schoolers. Seeing all these young girls get pregnant with no clue on how to support them.. So hard..I'm having a hard time understanding why those who don't always 'deserve' to be pregnant are. I'll pray you have success soon in your attempt to conceive! Good Luck!
  • I completely understand. I just miscarried my first at 8 week. I seen a pregnant woman in a store last night and lost it when I got in my car.
  • I completely understand. My husband and I have been TTC for about a year and I finally got pregnant a month ago. Then this morning I had a MC. Even before my MC I've been wrecked when I see pregnant people or new babies. It's not fair when people that don't want babies/haven't been trying to get pregnant, just get pregnant... I hope all of us get pregnant and keep our babies soon :-)
  • I feel ur pain, I lost my first pregnancy at 8weeks back in November after trying to conceive naturally for 3 years and ivf for a year, seems everyone around falls pregnant so easily. Can't bare to see pregnant people around me or hear how happy everyone is but me and my partner. Each day I cry thinking i could have done something different.

    Hopefully one day we all get what we want a precious bundle of joy xxx
  • thowarththowarth member
    edited March 2015
    I know the feeling even more when you go through hell... Me and my partner have been trying and I found out I was 5 weeks pregnant I was over the moon. At seven weeks I was turning 21 on the day of my birthday I lost my baby. Now every one is having perfect babies
  • mishons26 said:

    Anyone else notice how pregnant everyone seems to be? Or how you see nothing but babies on social media? It's hard. Extremely hard! I'll be the first to admit I'm extremely jealous over everyone pregnant and carrying healthy babies full term. Hope it's my turn next! Anyone else get the same feelings?!

    Completely feel that! Someone close to me fell the same time as me and she's just had her 20week scan and I'm so angry and jealous and emotional x
    As much I know it wasn't meant to be im actually fed up of hearing it x
  • I'm right there with all of you. Similar situations- a best friend with an unplanned baby (which she loves but totally wasn't trying or certainly didn't feel ready for at the time), my cousin announcing her pregnancy which has an almost identical due date to the baby I lost last month, and all those dang Facebook photos. I've never hidden more stuff from my feed out of pure envy before. So glad to hear I'm not alone here.
  • IzzilIzzil member
    Yes!!! As I was sitting in the waiting room of the OB/GYN a man came out flashing photos of the ultra sound to his MIL announcing 'she's 7 weeks!' - which is exactly how far along I was. It took EVERYTHING I had to not inform him of his insensitivity. Not EVERYONE there is pregnant and happy!!!
    I'm really dreading the OB/GYN now.
  • Yes. I try really hard not to be. But deep down inside it hurts. I actually have a best friend and four different family friends all due this year. And it was so exciting to all be finding out we would have overlapping pregnancies. Now they're all still having theirs and I'm not. Not to mention one of them is due about the same time I would have been and its a complete accident. And another one is having twins. We found out at a 12 week ultrasound (back in January) that I was carrying twins both already lost to us.
  • jusy came over from the 10/2015 board a week ago. Found I was having twins at 7 weeks. Found out at 12 that they stopped developing at about 10 1/2 weeks. This was an unplanned pregnancy but we were SO very excited that the past few days have been rough. The hardest part is not seeing my friends but seeing the lady sitting outside the frozen yogurt shop with a toddler running wild and a maybe 5-6 month baby bump smoking like a freight train and not giving a shit about the kid she has.
  • Three of my neighbors had babies in the last three days...exactly when I was diagnosed with my second missed miscarriage and had a D&C. I definitely know how you feel. It took us over two years to conceive this baby.

    (Please excuse my avatar. My app is screwed up and won't let me change from happy pregnant ladies. Go figure.)
  • I was diagnosed with my MMC on Monday, my SIL had her scheduled induction with healthy baby #4 yesterday, and I had my d&c today. So many mixed emotions. Also, as PP mentioned, when we went for our followup appointment for a second u/s, there was a very pregnant lady that waddled in behind us showcasing her belly. I was so happy to see an elderly woman come in because I assumed she was not there for a joyful occasion like everyone but us but rather a routine visit. And EVERY commercial around mother's day has babies!!!! Better days are ahead I pray.
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