MIL Rant

Re: MIL Rant

• SnarkasaurusRex member

  May 2015

  Tell your DH to email her and say that you're not able to play tour guide. Maybe invite her to dinner at your place one evening, but given that you'll be nearly full term by then, that you're not able to spend the day in the city. Just because she expects something doesn't mean you have to do it for her.

  

  

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• asun123 member

  May 2015

  I have problems with my MIL also. But I just don't let her win anymore. 

  Right now, You just need to be worrying about YOU. and what you think is best for yourself

  Bobby Llewellyn born September 29, 2012
  Kade Wayne born July 23, 2015
  MC in February 2017
  MC in November 2017
  Oliver Dean (Ollie) due December 17, 2018
  
  

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• ssnyder016 member

  May 2015

  My DH had a hard time realizing that it's completely inconvenient and is more or less just grateful she's going to visit (even if it's clearly for the wrong reasons). He's come around but not planning on trying to change her travel plans which means they all go out without me (because no way am I walking around midtown or going to a play!) Which is annoying. I've already told him that I really would just rather her wait until July to visit THE BABY! but aparently this is more convenient. Smh

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• rainbowBOOM member

  May 2015

  I obviously don't know the complete dynamics of your relationship with your in laws but this doesn't sound like a huge deal. It sounds like you're more bitter she isn't coming for the sole purpose of seeing you. Not coming for the shower or not waiting until after to see the baby.
  
  You definitely don't have to escort her the entire weekend, and your husband can do some of it alone. You're seeing red and it's probably not even that big of a commitment that she's asking you to make that weekend. In her mind she could possibly be thinking this is a good compromise to making the trip to NY to see you and H prior to the baby in preparation for the baby because she is missing the shower, plus as a bonus gets to celebrate her birthday and make that special as well.
  
  Step back, take a breather and let the plans unfold. How do you know what you'll feel like doing at 35 weeks? No need to commit to solid plans, because you don't know how you'll feel, but causing rifts and bitterness over how you think you might feel isn't the best idea.

  

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• ssnyder016 member

  May 2015

  I appreciate what your saying and I definitely am a little bitter that she's chosen to skip the baby shower. I do know that I definitely don't want to be walking around the city all day Saturday and going to a Broadway show. I spent last weekend with my H running errands and walking around our neighborhood for the day and was completely shot by the end and throughout the beginning of the week at work, so I have a pretty good idea Times Square won't be super fun especially in mid June. We have lived in this city for 8 years together and she's visited once prior to this so idk maybe this is a 'compromise' on her part but it doesn't feel like it's that considerate of a compromise. I also know that sitting out some of the planned events will not go over well with her and I know H would be hurt too. Not to mention I would be stuck at home while they were out celebrating her birthday?
  
  I am definitely trying to be appreciative of her efforts but I do think think waiting a month or coming upstate next week would be a little more considerate of her. Especially because if she were to visit to see the baby, we wouldn't have to run around the city all day and be able to just relax and enjoy our visit.
  
  Thanks for your perspective though! It definitely helps, maybe she isn't expecting me to make that big of a commitment after all.

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• rainbowBOOM member

  May 2015

  Definitely why I said I don't know the dynamics. That definitely makes things sound more frustrating.
  
  Some people just don't think things through.

  

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