WTF!?!

munchiemama104 · April 2015

So I am freaking out! My DS is 6 months old and I just found out I'm pregnant again! I am losing it. My DH and I have not been getting along since DS has been here. There has been a lot of stress and I feel like a single mom a lot of the time. I don't know what to do.

phoebecar · April 2015

First, I'm so sorry you and your husband aren't getting along right now. I think when you have a baby it puts a bit of a strain on just about every relationship you have, espeically the one you share with your spouse since your time is no longer your own. With that said, I understand what you are going through. I got pregnant with my second when my first was 11 months old. I will say this- while the first year was a bit of a challenge, every year afterward has been fantastic. They are the best of friends, they play together all of the time and they even gang up on my husband and I. In retrospect, I wouldn't have my children's birth spacing any other way (except for maybe earlier together like you!) It really is something special to watch them play so well together!!!

So take a deep breath mama! You are doing a great job and you are going to be okay! As far as the issues with your husband, perhaps sitting down and chatting with him about your concerns and fears about this pregnancy while also taking care of your LO might do the trick! I'd also suggest maybe getting a babysitter for your LO, going out on a date and getting back to why you guys got married in the first place.

You are doing great!

NoSugarCoating · April 2015

carrieleigh said:
First, I'm so sorry you and your husband aren't getting along right now. I think when you have a baby it puts a bit of a strain on just about every relationship you have, espeically the one you share with your spouse since your time is no longer your own. With that said, I understand what you are going through. I got pregnant with my second when my first was 11 months old. I will say this- while the first year was a bit of a challenge, every year afterward has been fantastic. They are the best of friends, they play together all of the time and they even gang up on my husband and I. In retrospect, I wouldn't have my children's birth spacing any other way (except for maybe earlier together like you!) It really is something special to watch them play so well together!!!
So take a deep breath mama! You are doing a great job and you are going to be okay! As far as the issues with your husband, perhaps sitting down and chatting with him about your concerns and fears about this pregnancy while also taking care of your LO might do the trick! I'd also suggest maybe getting a babysitter for your LO, going out on a date and getting back to why you guys got married in the first place.
You are doing great!

That's great -- for you. There is absolutely no guarantee that things will work out for the OP as well. That's very naive.

phoebecar · April 2015

@nosugarcoating- you are absoutely correct! what works for me may not work for the OP which is exactly why I said "I wouldn't have it any other way....." rather than "everyone should do it this way because it is the correct way," because I don't think everyone would do it that way exactly.

There was no reason to attack me. the OP is upset and all I tried to do is give her a positive thought and anecdotal evidence that everything has the potential for working out for the best. I don't believe that's very naive at all, in fact, I think it's just the opposite.

NoSugarCoating · April 2015

@carrieleigh I did not attack you. You stated, and I quote "you are going to be okay." I simply pointed out that you have no way of guaranteeing that things will work out for OP the way they did for you. You're giving false hope, which helps no one.

desireerobinson · May 2015

I'm in the same boat. I found out I was pregnant when my son was 4 months old. I've never been super fertile and I guess I didn't take the raging hormones as a sign of fertility post partum. Oops. I had some serious sleep deprived freak out moments. As it is beginning to settle in though, I'm relaxing and allowing myself to get excited about the positives. The thing that bothers me most now is that DS won't be getting all of my attention anymore. He turns 1 two days after I'm due. I will be so sad if I'm busy having a baby on his 1st birthday.

Going out on a limb, and want to encourage you. It seems to me that the fact that your having stress and concern over this means you care. You want a happy healthy life for your family. Good for you. Try to redirect some of that energy into moving forward and preparing yourself and hopefully your marriage for what's to come. So much easier said than done. I'm reminding myself everyday to do the same.

Good luck! You're not alone.

mommamelmo · May 2015

DS was 18months old when I found out I was pregnant with DD. Left my husband at the time 4 days after I goty BFP and never looked back! Things aren't always perfect but in the end you can make your own happiness

Best of luck

wassuphoes · May 2015

Having a child changes the dynamic of your relationship with your partner. Rough spots are common. Sometimes they are just that, spots. Other times though they run deeper and are more problematic.

Talk to your husband. Don't just keep going on thinking this will improve over time by itself, because it won't. Let him know how you're feeling. Find out how he's feeling. I also recommend giving couples counseling a try, if he doesn't want to go (which I would take as a red flag) it can be beneficial for you to seek counseling on your own.

Best of luck to you.

munchiemama104 · May 2015

Thank you all for your reply. The initial; shock has worn off, but I'm still confused what to do. I guess I'm going to give it a few more days. I"m already 8 weeks, so my time is running out. Thank you all for your help.

PrimRoseMama · May 2015

munchiemama104 said:
So I am freaking out! My DS is 6 months old and I just found out I'm pregnant again! I am losing it. My DH and I have not been getting along since DS has been here. There has been a lot of stress and I feel like a single mom a lot of the time. I don't know what to do.

You sit down & talk to your husband about helping you with your babies.

WTF!?!

Re: WTF!?!

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