June 2015 Moms
heidiiwa
member
Does being pregnant make you want to have more children?
heidiiwa
member
We started our family late and I had the mindset of "one child at the most"--I didn't think we could afford to have a big family and didn't even think I could get pregnant, so it was a happy surprise when it happened this time. Anyway since I've been pregnant I've been fantasizing off and on about having more children after this, impractical as it is given our circumstances. I'm 40, my husband's still in school, and I'm going back to school for my doctorate in the fall, so having even this one is a stretch for our finances and limited time. Maybe it's pregnancy hormones making me feel more maternal, or because this pregnancy isn't that bad I've gained confidence that I could possibly survive another one? Wanting to have a girl (this one is a boy) may be part of it too. Anyone else find being pregnant makes them want more children than they originally intended?
Re: Does being pregnant make you want to have more children?
With that being said finances and timing are never perfect; go with your heart Mama!
FTM here, and I agree with you, OP. Having a relatively easy pregnancy so far, knock on wood, definitely makes me want more - also the reality of being pregnant and realizing what it is and isn't. I keep saying, "one, maybe two more" and DH keeps saying, "let's get through one and see how things go."
I will be 32 in a couple weeks, and we always said 32 was a good age to have kids - it worked out remarkably well. Now I am wishing I was a bit younger so we could have two more before 35, but what can ya do. Guess we still could, but whoa. Life is what happens while we are busy making plans, right?
My cousin my age has four kids. I thought she was crazy, but she is the best mom, they are the greatest family, and now at 32 looking back, I totally get it. Four is probably too many for me, but I have a totally new perspective now on young moms.
Am still sublimlely happy with what I did in my 20s. I am not one to regret anything, and I am fortunate enough to be actively living and choosing the life I want. Sometimes I just want more than one life, though. So greedy and spoiled!
We both agree we want to have more than one child as we think having siblings is very important (we see friends who are single children who end up having to be sole support for parents as they get older for example, and we want out child to have siblings to experience life with, like family vacations).
We can't afford one kid right now, much less two, but we will figure it out. (And really, can anyone ever truly afford a kid?)
I'm not looking forward to being pregnant again, even though I've had a very easy pregnancy (so in my mind, the next can only be worse!). But DH and I are both mid-30s and he's getting anxious he will be the old dad in classrooms, lol.
My biggest anxiety is stalling my career a second time...
Totally agree with this. We've always had a preference for two children, but my mind can only deal with one baby at a time.
2nd round exp 8/20/18.
I told my husband if he gets pregnant, then sure we can have many more. \:D/
We will see how delivery goes and I did have some scares early on. I won't say this pregnancy makes me WANT more kids but it hasn't deterred me either.
As for myself, I wouldn't say that pregnancy has made me want more children. With my first pregnancy ending in m/c and this one having some compilations, I think I will be happy to not be pregnant and not have to worry. I don't think pregnancy will ever be super easy for me on the mental/emotional side, however I know that I want another baby...just in a couple of years and DH agrees that if we do have another, it won't be right away.
I guess whatever we all choose, I have yet to meet anyone who's said they genuinely wish they hadn't grown their family, financially taxing or otherwise.
ETA: grammar errors
Like most of you ladies I thought preganancy would be so much different than it is. Now that I've experienced it (mostly) I now know how easy it actually is.
@heidiiwa maybe our feelings for more kids is stemming from excitement to meet our LO? Idk. For me this pregnancy has brought on feelings of what it'll be like to be a family and my vision of our family includes more kids.
Knowing that I'm going to be a mom of one brings on thoughts of when I'll have more. I really don't want my kids to be far apart in age, but a big reality of life is finances. I say if you can afford another & have established a routine with your family(work schedules, daycare, etc) go for it!
I knew the timing of this pregnancy was perfect & I'm sure I'll know again in the future.
I'll probably have one or two more and be done.
As soon as we found out we were having a little boy, though, I was like "oh, okay... Now I need a little girl to complete my set."
Haha!
I think I'll be more prepared next time and not try to tough things out with HG, and give myself a break more often with my job and career goals. It'll be hard, but worth it I think.
:-)