am i a terrible mum — The Bump
Attachment Parenting

am i a terrible mum

My LO is 9 weeks old and up to yet i feel like i do everything wrong, i co sleep as i get a full nights sleep as does he and we are both cosy, i both breast and bottle feed because he eats too much, feel like I'm over feeding but hes always so hungry! I knocked his head slightly on the fire place shelf he cried for 5 minutes i cried for at least 20, does this make me a terrible mummy?

Re: am i a terrible mum

  • You are not terrible- the fact that you actually worry about the kind of mother you are generally lends itself to the idea that you're probably a pretty good one. Accidents happen, I was so sleep deprived when DD1 was 3 days old I fell asleep in the rocking chair and she fell on the ground- I was a wreck, she was fine. If you keep feeling anxious and worried consider talking to your doctor about it because PPA is just as real and difficult as PPD in my experience.

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  • Nothing sounds "bad". Regarding the head, every parent makes mistakes. It is sad and hard, but to be expected in an imperfect world. About sleep, as long as you are following the rules of safe bedsharing--more power to you! It is how babies and moms have slept for most of history. As for nursing, if supplementing with a bottle is best for your family then keep on, but if you'd like to look into addressing supply and demand with breastmilk then there are some great options out there. A LeLeche League meeting is a great place to start. The community with other moms of little ones might be comforting to you and show that you aren't alone and all of these things are very normal (though normal doesn't necessarily mean easy).
    sunbum76
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  • WDDCHWDDCH member
    I have bed shared with four of my five kiddos. If done safely it is actually very beneficial to you and to baby.

    Accidents happen and once baby is really mobile he will get all sorts of bumps and bruises. We do our best but we can't and won't prevent all problems.

    Feeding - how you feed your baby is up to you. If you want to supplement with a bottle that's totally fine. If you want to drop the supplementation try nursing every 1.5-3 hours (whenever he wants basically), around the clock. Just let him be at the breast all day. It can boost supply. Eating oatmeal everyday for breakfast also helped my supply. I could've fed twins in the milk I was producing just because I ate oatmeal!
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • We all have accidents sometimes! I am sure as your little one gets older he will have more bumps and bangs. I know my two littles have had plenty of them! 

    As for bed-sharing/co-sleeping, no shame in that! I know breastfeeding is exhausting it may seem you aren't making enough… but you probably are! Just make sure you are eating plenty of healthy fats (avocado, nuts, nut butters) and drinking plenty of water and you should be fine. Also make sure baby is fully emptying your breasts… breast milk is very much supply and demand! If you are really worried, see an IBCLC for guidance. 
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