If you cant say anything nice, dont say nothing at all.

mgdunn · April 2015

My babies are fairly close together. Oldest and youngest are exactly 18 months apart and youngest and the new baby will be 20 months apart. I am a fairly young mom but definitely not a bad mom.. Hubby works so that I can stay home with the girls and we dont have tons of money but we make it. We have received TONS of rude comments from friends and family about the new baby. Things such as "Dont you know what causes that by now" and when people told my mom congratulations, she replied with "I dont know if its something to be happy about." I try not to say stuff but we pay all of our own bills and our kids are very well taken care of. Im just tired of hearing the rude comments. Just because they are close in age, means nothing, right? Im probably being overly sensitive but my feelings have been really hurt over all of it. We always were told the saying "If you cant say anything nice, dont say anything at all" does this not apply to adults too?

Carmofrap · April 2015

Nope, adults, especially older adults think they have a license to run off at the mouth about whatever they want. You pay for your kids, you raise them, no one else gets an opinion. Children are a blessing no matter when in life they occur. It frustrates me that people are so quick to be excited for a first only if it come on there idea of a good timeline for you and quick to want the opposite sex for a second and then after that are so harsh about more. It isn't any of their business!

mrsdhouse89 · April 2015

My feelings would be torn apart if my mother ever said something like that. Babies are blessings not burdens. She owes you an apology in my opinion. I've made the comment "you know what causes babies right?" to my dear friend who is in the same boat as you, BUT it was purely joking and meant with love and she knows how excited I am for them, because again, babies are blessings not burdens.

amberrmariee20 · April 2015

They will get over it, my sister is 33 on her 4th baby, ages 11,10, 5 and now newborn, everyone had something to say at first ! People just seem to think they can have say in others lives because they don't respect their choices and decisions !!

Kitkatmoro · April 2015

I will be 43 when this baby is born.. my youngest currently will be 20 in October ... i am 14 weeks today and still have not told my mom or my sisters... just because I am worried that their response will be.

Vanessa226 · April 2015

One of the best mothers I know is a young mom. She had 4 kids before age 25. Her husband works and she's a stay at home mom. They don't get assistance from anyone. In fact, she cares for the kids of her in-laws. I've always admired her as a mom and as a woman in general. Not all of us are cut out to do that.

Let people say what they want. You don't need to prove anything to them. You're a good mom. You know it, your husband knows it and most importantly your kids know it.

naka92 · April 2015

Thats just ridiculous. Just because you're having your babies close together doesnt mean theyre accidents! Where do people get off saying stuff like that.. I see nothing wrong with a young mom having kids close together as long as all kids are taken care of properly, which honestly has nothing to.do with age, as an older mom can be irresponsible too. Age shouldnt even be mentioned really, people should be looking at wether you and your partner are good parents, who the heck cares about age and babies being close in age as long as those babies are happy and healthy?!
Im 23 and a ftm, but if anyone said that to me (we plan to have our second close to our first) theyd not get away with it. Its downright insulting and you shouldn't let them get away with that. Babies are a blessing.

nsaid4u · April 2015

I think its wonderful hun! My middle two are a year apart..they are best friends and always get mistaken for twins...as long as the babies are loved and taken care of (which doesnt mean designer jeans) go ahead and do your thing mama!

i get judged too because we are on baby #4 (and probably having more). Ppl cant believe we are having 'so many' babies..i am 31, we are financially stable, and love the idea of a big family....my fam are the type who thinks 2 children is enough...i dont care what ppl think anymore...I LOVE OUR HOUSE FULL OF LOVE AND BABIES!

tate62610 · April 2015

Omg I love big families!! My Dad has 5 sisters. It's so much fun having big family gatherings. A friend of mine is on her second set of twins (6 kids total) and she has seriously had people say "oh are you trying to be the Duggars?" "Did your husband father all of them?" "I think it's time to close up shop" I was horrified for her when I heard these things! They're financially stable, 28 and incredible parents. I can't believe the awful and rude things people say.

s&jeggerton · April 2015

Some people just have no manners. My sister and I are 18 months apart and we were very close growing up because we were so close in age. I plan on having kids who are close in age as well for that reason.

choyandjill · April 2015

Me and my younger sister are 20 months apart. Growing up we were each other's nemesis. But now, she's my best friend and I wouldn't have it any other way. Having a sibling who you can relate to about everything is the best. About your detractors, let their insults fall on deaf ears. They are haters and haters just gonna hate hate hate.

LiveNLove44 · April 2015

Unfortunately, I don't think this is terribly uncommon. I've heard that same comment said to some of my coworkers who have more than 2 children. 1) People are nosy; 2) They think your business is theirs; 3) People can be rude; I feel like those three truths are all the same, which probably makes the problem worse

I hope you're able to let it roll off your back soon enough because there will be comments, and there will be looks, but only you and your husband will have the beautiful family to cuddle and enjoy as they grow into wonderful people. Remember why you're doing it, and try not to let those cotton-headed-ninnimuggins get the best of your experience

aah1013 · April 2015

If we didn't have fertility issues, I'd be having lots off kiddies, too. I say, more power to you! It's your family, who cares what others think?!

leeannaRowlett · April 2015

My two are 11 months apart and now my one on the way will be 3 years from the other two of that makes since

LLynde5 · April 2015

I had a friend post this the other day because she is on baby #4 and was annoyed with all of the comments. It made me so happy that she sticks up for her family! No one else has to raise those beautiful babies but her and her husband:)

https://youtu.be/JbFzOzuQedY

Ree0123 · April 2015

@LLynde5 that was too cute

CCasey2015 · April 2015

@LLynde5 ... That was the cutest thing EVER!

cnorth82 · April 2015

I'm 17 months from my big sister and I like it that way. We go through a lot of the same issues at the same time.

I am having babies later in life 33-36 so I plan on my kids being close in age on purpose. Less risk of chromosomal abnormalities and at this point I'm ready to get started and knock this part out so I won't be an old lady at my kids graduations.

Maybe it's because IDGAF as I get older but when people say stuff like that to me I call them out. I would say "wow, that's rude" or "well It's my life so I'll live it how I want"

I just don't have any qualms about letting people know they crossed a line. Otherwise, they continue on thinking that saying stuff like that is ok. You're helping them in the long run.

Plus, ain't nobody got time for that!

S&C+3 · May 2015

I agree my kids are close together & I'm fairly young working on my 4th, and ppl say stuff to me to! It's upsetting!
I try to keep classy, but on Sunday I went off at my in laws house! The truth is I'm kinda glad I did, but wish I wouldn't have. My sister dates my brother n law... (That's another headache...it was her I yelled at told her to shut her mouth & keep her opinions to herself)
I think I really should have waited and said something like "you're being rude & insensitive & I think you should head some good ole preschool rules... If you can't say something nice say nothing at all"

adcoxmt · May 2015

@LLynde5 that was the best video!!!

Bottom line: it's your body, you ca grow who you want to, girl! If you're not hurting anyone, neglecting your babies, or anything bad such as that, why the F do they think it's so "bad" to invite more love and joy into your family?! Sorry you're having to deal with that crap, darlin'!

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