Babies on the Brain

I've got the fever

Hi all, My husband and I have decided to start TTC in September this year. We are 27 and have been married 13 months, together 5 years. A year ago I wasn't even thinking about babies, despite most of my friends having them, in fact my DH and I had discussed maybe not having one at all! I have baby fever all of a sudden, and it is making me crazy, I was the same with wedding fever before we got engaged, and managed to wait a year and a half to get married after he popped the question- probably mostly due to the fact that I planned the wedding on my own (without family help or financial assistance) and made it just what I wanted it to be- with hubby's input of course! We have booked a vacation for the end of August/beginning of September to help me stick to our plan. DH is starting a new job in April which has "normal" office hours, as opposed to shift work that he has been doing since we have been together and I am secure in my job, so it seems like the right time. Has anyone else has this sudden change of heart? It came over me all of a sudden and now it's all I can think about!

Re: I've got the fever

  • xxkberxxxxkberxx member
    edited March 2015
    My husband and I were similar in our stance on children. We got married young, so we knew we didn't want to have children right away. As the years progressed we even started talking about not having children, and we were content with the idea. Many people have asked us when we are going to have kids and our response has always been, "not for a while" or "we aren't ready". Well, this year seems like a switch just flipped and now I have serious baby fever. It is weird how quickly your decision can change. DH and I have been talking and the soonest we can start TTC is January 2016. 

    I think it is great that you have a trip planned to keep the both of you focused on your goal. Since you are going to start TTC in September, I would suggest you start taking prenatal pills and get FF to start tracking your BBT. That way you have a better understanding of your cycles and when you ovulate which will be helpful for you when the time comes to TTC. I wish you the best! 
    Anniversary
    Me (29) + DH (30) | Dating 2003 | Married 2008
    DS - 02/21/2016

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  • My husband and I also decided to plan a "last hurrah" before starting to try for a baby in 2011. Having that to plan and look forward to made the time pass for me. I also used the time to get off the pill and let my cycle regulate. Something I didn't do at the time, but recommend, is reading Taking Charge of a your Fertlity and beginning temping and charting to really understand your cycle and ovulation. good luck!
  • YES!  I have had absolutely no interest in having children my entire life (I turn 29 in October this year...) and all of a sudden within the past 6-9 months something has slowly changed in my brain.  People always said to me "you'll change your mind" and I found it so insulting, but I think they might have actually been right. I even told my now husband on our second date that I never wanted kids (it's a deal breaker for some people!).  I have been so set on the child-free lifestyle for my husband and I for the rest of our life...doing whatever we want whenever we want, but I think we'll be missing out on a huge, awesome life experience if we don't have kids.  And I've never ever had thoughts like that before.

    I read a statement online somewhere that said something along the lines of "you can never regret having children, but you can regret NOT having them" and it has always stuck with me... just some food for thought!  I support people who want to have kids and people who are child-free!  The most important thing in life is to be happy!  :)
    "Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure... than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."

    "Thought gives substance to reality."

    "But an accurate definition of the self is impossible. You are more than you realize, more than you can define. And the more time you spend trying to nail down the definition, the less time you spend living right now. Your past is not your identity...you, living now, is your identity."
  • edited March 2015
    Thanks xKBERx, I actually started taking prenatal vitamins last week, so far no sickness, which is good. I came off of depo last July after reading horror stories of no cycle returning for over a year! Luckily for me, AF paid me a visit the first month after I was due to have the next injection. I have been quite regular since, give or take a day or two here and there. I've also been inspecting my fluids... down there, and have an understanding of ovulation 'consistency' now. Lol. Also, I swear I can feel when I'm ovulating, I get a slight twinge (not always on the same side) around that time.

    Jnnfrrose6 a thanks for the tip! Where did you go for your "baby moon"?

    Chrinsky - I had the exact same thoughts, and it was just going to be me, DH and the pups... then one day, I suddenly felt like I would be missing out and knew I couldn't NOT have a child. I went through every reason in the book as to why I shouldn't (including the world being such a terrible place compared to when I was a kid haha-how irrational?!). I was one of those people that thought they didn't want children, so I too support whatever decision people make, neither side should turn up their nose at anyone's decision.
  • The same thing happened with us. I never felt even close to ready, and I always stressed about knowing I'd have to be a working mom (which my mother was not). But after a few close friends at work had children and proved that their work life didn't suffer and they were also great moms, I started seeing myself in that role too.  I remember trying to tell my husband that I thought I'd be ready to start trying in July (which was still over 6 months away at the time) and I got all sweaty and couldn't get the words out.  Now, I'm counting down the months and getting really excited. :) Funny how things just suddenly change.
  • SurferP528 I hear you about the working mom thing, I even spoke to my COO and asked how it was for her haha (luckily I have a good relationship with her)! Both my CEO and COO are women. It can be done, and I like having a career, so I think I'd go crazy if I had to stay at home. Each to their own!
  • @MarriedtoMummy we went to India and Nepal. It was incredible.
  • @jnnfrrose6 wow! Sounds amazing! We are going to Hong Kong, Singapore and Bali! So excited. I've been working out consistently (dropped off a little after the wedding) and eating healthily, I want one last summer at my ideal weight and pre baby body, that way I'll be in my routine and geared up to continue during pregnancy :)
  • @jnnfrrose6 wow! Sounds amazing! We are going to Hong Kong, Singapore and Bali! So excited. I've been working out consistently (dropped off a little after the wedding) and eating healthily, I want one last summer at my ideal weight and pre baby body, that way I'll be in my routine and geared up to continue during pregnancy :)




    You've got a great sounding trip too! Definitely keep up with the work out routine. I worked out throughout both of my pregnancies, including the night before I went into labor with my first. I really think it helped me recover more quickly (ended up with an unplanned c-section because baby was breech, unbeknownst to anyone). I'll also really recommend again temping to learn your cycle. Maybe you'll get lucky and be ovulating on your trip. Turned out I was and I got my BFP shortly after our return.
  • edited March 2015
    @jnnfrrose6 the trip is 2 weeks (in which my ovulation should definitely fall ;) ). I will start temping in a couple of months, so I have at least 3 months under my belt before the trip. Thanks for the tip! DHs birthday is the end of October, what an amazing surprise that would be! If not, hopefully by Christmas!
  • Hey everyone,

      This is my first time posting. So I feel like many of you at the moment. My husband and I were together for 8 years prior to getting married (dated through college & afterwards) then were engaged for 5 months. We have now been married for 1 year and 3 months. I just finished full-time graduate school last December & will be 29 this July.

    My husband has a stable job but I'm hoping to have something permanent within the next 2 months. Literally ALL I can think about is starting a family. Our goal is to wait until Spring 2016 (1 more year) when we will be more financially stable.

    Those that have been through this before thanks for the helpful tips about coming off of the birth control a few months before & beginning to take prenatal vitamins. The ones that have had children before (I know it is different for everyone), but how long did it take you and your husband to conceive once you stopped the birth control? That's a big question of mine since I've been taking it for roughly 14 years now.

    Have a great Easter everyone!

     

  • juliebeannnjuliebeannn member
    edited April 2015
    I was like this!! I thought I was the only one!!! 

    Actually, I had baby fever before we even got engaged but knew that wasn't the smartest idea.  Then fast-forward to being newlyweds and we think life is so awesome that we start to think that maybe we don't have to have kids!  For most of our marriage (almost 4 years now), we were of the mindset, if a kid happens, we're ok with it, but we would actually be ok with never having kids.  Then about 2 months ago, I was a day or two late on my period and thought I might be pregnant.  To my surprise, I got excited at the thought of being pregnant instead of anxious.  That was a huge wake up call for me.  I also inwardly started getting a little jealous every time yet another friend was pregnant (everyone around me popping out babies!!).  So, obviously not the inner thoughts of a woman that doesn't want a child. 

    So, within just a few months, I went from thinking babies were a maybe to being a huge yes.  I'm now counting down the days until we can start actively trying.  I have a weightlifting competition on 8/1 so after that, green light!  I'm hoping to plan a short getaway in Aug or Sept to help the process along ;)  but since we're also renovating our kitchen this summer, money will be tight.  I'm sure we can go somewhere local.

    All your pre-baby-moons sound amazing!!!
    Together 2007 | Married 2011 | Me: 36 | DH: 38
    Adopted Furbaby: 2014
    TTC#1 : 1/2016 | IUI #2 - BFP 12/24/16 -- born 9/8/17
    TTC#2: 11/2019 | Dx DOR (AMH 0.3), AMA
    IUI #2 - BFP 7/1/20 -- EDD 3/14/21
  • @BenandLeigh09 I was on bc (pill, progestogen only pill and depo) for 13 years, last was depo and came off of it last July. I wanted to be sure to wait the full year before trying as depo can be taxing on the body. I've heard you should wait at least 2 months after the pill for your uterine wall to thicken, to lessen the chance of the baby not planting correctly (which can cause miscarriage). But there are people, my mum being one of them, who get pregnant right away with no problems. Welcome aboard!
  • My husband and I sound exactly like you guys! We've been together 8 years and were 100% anti baby and now in the last 2 years all of our friends are having babies and in the last 3 months my brain cant get off baby mode! We are thinking about trying soon too :) Its just so crazy how our minds change! Good luck on your journey! 
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