4 year is asking questions

wallserve · April 2015

So, my 4 year old little boy told me the baby is going to, "bust out of your belly button mommy!" I told him I hoped not (b/c my first thought was C-section). He asked me (very honestly), "then where does the baby come out then?" I need suggestions please on how to handle this talk or situation. I know a lot will say to just be honest...and I think I'm ok with that...I think. haha Suggestions please.

Kern91 · April 2015

My daughter who is 4 and will be 5 in June was asking me how does the baby come out and I told her u know those tampons that u have seen before and I told u I would let u know when u get older and understand more this is the same situation. When u get older I will tell u all about those things. She just looked at me and said okay and went about her business. I figured simple answer where u don't explain yet works.

emilyealbers · April 2015

You could say something like "mommys have a special hole where babies come out"

If you want to go a little bit more into it, you can tell him boys and girls have special parts where pee pee and poo poo come out, and mommys also have another hole for babies.

JStill0603 · April 2015

I would just tell him that when its time for the baby to come, mommy will go to the hospital and the doctor will help get the baby out of mommy's tummy. If my 5yo stepson asks, that will be the approach I'll take

prolixity · April 2015

This is my fourth pregnancy/baby and when I was pregnant with my third, my older two sons were convinced that my belly was like an egg that would crack and let the baby out. They saw my stretch marks and thought my belly was cracking. lol

Cardiganmom2 · April 2015

@prolixity that's so great!

Pontot31 · April 2015

My 3 year old informed me the other day that when it's time the doctor will help me get the baby out. We didn't teach her that! But her teacher just had a baby last month so I have a feeling they discussed it in school.

If she wants more details I will show her my CS scar from her birth! But I'll tell her babies usually come out of their mom's vaginas. I'm all for proper terminology. I doubt she will ask for more details beyond that.

For 4 and 5 year olds I would look into some age appropriate books too.

OSUJaydee · April 2015

My four year old is also asking questions! He's not gotten to the "where" part yet, but I figure that question is coming soon. I think I'll just tell him that mommies have a special place in their bodies for the baby to come out and leave it at that.

Laurakat81 · April 2015

I agree with honesty. I've got family that has told kids the baby comes out a magical door that appears in their belly (this is fine for c-section mamas I suppose but it was not told by a csection mama...but even then a "magical" door that just appears?!). Why confuse a kid?! You don't have to be too specific. But the truth is ALWAYS the best. I'd tell him the baby comes through a special passage way from the womb (the place where the baby lives in Mommy's tummy) to the vagina and out. If you don't say it all giggly and get all weird about it neither will a little kid. Girls have vaginas. We birth babies. Not a big deal.

SamanthaAshley820 · April 2015

I told my 5 year old the truth. It will come from my who-haa. Don't answer questions they didn't ask though. Lol she asked how the baby got in there and I told her I have special baby seeds and daddy has special water. Lol she accepted that answer. I read an article online that a woman used a doll and a turtle neck to demonstrate and the girl was very understanding and content with that answer. I try to not lie to my daughter about anything... And truth be told what you tell them at 4 or 5 probably won't stick with them. It's kind of hard to traumatize a young child... Or at least mine. Lol

kmkrushi · April 2015

Pontot31 said:
My 3 year old informed me the other day that when it's time the doctor will help me get the baby out. We didn't teach her that! But her teacher just had a baby last month so I have a feeling they discussed it in school.

If she wants more details I will show her my CS scar from her birth! But I'll tell her babies usually come out of their mom's vaginas. I'm all for proper terminology. I doubt she will ask for more details beyond that.

For 4 and 5 year olds I would look into some age appropriate books too.

I'm all for the proper terminology, in theory! I wish I could use it, but I'm still struck from my parents not using it (with a little catholic shame thrown in). With my daughter I've called it her "girl part" and I've tried to be as honest with her as possible with out confusing her.

At 4 I think you could tell the truth, just in terms he would understand. You don't have to go into nitty-gritty details to be honest.

wallserve · April 2015

I asked his teacher as well...who has multiple children of her own...she (with a laugh of course) asked me to, "Please don't tell him the truth...your son is so honest and smart....I'll have to have a health lesson with the rest of the class and then explain it to their parents!" haha

kmkrushi · April 2015

wallserve said:
I asked his teacher as well...who has multiple children of her own...she (with a laugh of course) asked me to, "Please don't tell him the truth...your son is so honest and smart....I'll have to have a health lesson with the rest of the class and then explain it to their parents!" haha

I've worried about this with my daughter who is only 2, but way too smart for her own good. She also speaks very clearly so there is no mistaking what she says...

But like she said, he's also smart. So I still wouldn't lie. Maybe just gloss over details.

helsbels222 · April 2015

When my 5 year old son asked, I turned it around and ask him what he thought. Then I told him he was absolutely right (he said they come out of your belly button). I realize we'll probably have that talk again soon because he doesn't know he's going to be a big brother yet. I'm sure it will come up once he finds out.

Ceridwen77 · April 2015

I agreed with others who said don't lie. That doesn't mean you need to provide graphic details, but pregnancy and birth are completely natural, so I don't see a reason to make up a story about a stork or an imaginary door.

cfletch88 · April 2015

JStill0603 said:
I would just tell him that when its time for the baby to come, mommy will go to the hospital and the doctor will help get the baby out of mommy's tummy. If my 5yo stepson asks, that will be the approach I'll take

This is what I told my 5yo when he asked.

katilee618 · April 2015

My nephew told me that babies come out like a solid. Then he pointed to his butt. I left it like that.

DrMommaDVM · April 2015

Laurakat81 said:
I agree with honesty. I've got family that has told kids the baby comes out a magical door that appears in their belly (this is fine for c-section mamas I suppose but it was not told by a csection mama...but even then a "magical" door that just appears?!). Why confuse a kid?! You don't have to be too specific. But the truth is ALWAYS the best. I'd tell him the baby comes through a special passage way from the womb (the place where the baby lives in Mommy's tummy) to the vagina and out. If you don't say it all giggly and get all weird about it neither will a little kid. Girls have vaginas. We birth babies. Not a big deal.

"magical door" made me laugh!

I second everything you said. Not a big deal.

wallserve · April 2015

Thank you ladies

angiesbump · April 2015

I was always told the truth right from the beginning.. About how it happened and about where they come out of. I was told that a lot of my friends don't know this yet and it's up their mommies and daddies to tell them and that I may hear differently from other kids and they're mommies and daddies might say the body parts are called different things and that that's ok and that I was to respect that. I was 3 at the time and never had any problems.

snmom · April 2015

When I told my 3 year old there were 2 babies in my belly he nodded in understanding. A minute later, he turns back to me with a terrified look on his face and asked, " Mommy, why did you eat babies?" I had to explain that I didn't eat them, but they are growing in there and he asked how they got there. I couldn't think of a good, age-appropriate response at the time, so I deflected with, "let's watch Mickey Mouse clubhouse," and I was saved.

4 year is asking questions

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