I need advice please!

Destiny110 · April 2015

We found out we were having a girl in December by January we had a name Ava Grace. We posted it on facebook and everything. About a month ago my sisters cousin's wife (we have different dads so I am not really kin to them) created a event on Facebook called Baby shower for Miss Ava Grace. She started posting that on fb and some of my family commenting saying that is the same name Destiny and Phillip ( me and my husband) picked and they said yeah its a pretty name at least they wont have the same last name!! This just makes me so mad! I am thinking about texting her telling her how much this bothers me. It is my first child and it is supposed to be special thing naming your first and all your children and I feel she ripped that away from me. I would be ok with the same first name I understand people have the same first name, but she could change the middle name expecially because they are so close in the family and will be close to the same grade in school. What do you all think I should do?

klkonwi · April 2015

To play devils advocate.... Ava is a VERY popular name right now. However I would personally be very upset just like you are because they are technically family members. I am sorry you are going through this. If you really love the name then keep it. If it's important to you to be unique then change it. We have a lot of boys (cousins) all due this summer and to try and avoid this I messaged the one that has a particular name she loves to make sure we don't have it on our list..... Because she's due after us in august. It's so tough naming a kid!

ksimo6 · April 2015

Next time around, I would suggest keeping your decisions off of Facebook. We refuse to share the name until the day the kid is born... Helps us avoid some of these issues. Good luck.

ashleyahuff · April 2015

I would be super pissed, but I would still use the name! People already know you said it first. They'll think she's the odd one.

I wouldn't even mention it to her. It's not worth it to get upset when she probably won't change her mind. She didn't care about your feelings in the first place, she won't start now.

Destiny110 · April 2015

I am totally ok with them having the same first name. I went to school with 3 other Destiny's . The middle name is the one that is important to me. It is my Grandmothers middle name. I already have the name monogrammed on things. I am due in June and she is due in September. If I was her and someone had the same name that was due before me I feel it would be the right thing to do. Do you think I should tell her how I feel? I haven't said anything personally to me and it is really bothering me.

virginiaunicorn11 · April 2015

Yes, talk to her. Calmly. She will look crazy for taking your name. You need to be prepared for that scenario.

I know more than one Ava Grace, but one per family should be the rule...

karaelaine1991 · April 2015

In my family duplicate names are common... but that's very strange that she's using BOTH of your names! I don't blame you for being annoyed and wanting to talk to her about it. Worth a shot! But I do think you should be prepared for her to say no. The thing that is in your favor is that if she decides she doesn't care what you think and she's bound and determined to use that name, EVERYONE will know you had it first and she's going to come out looking like she's copying you. Good luck!

Destiny110 · April 2015

Thanks for everything. I will talk to her tomorrow. I will let yall know what she says.

ElRuby · April 2015

I would still use it...it is completely possible she already picked it out and didn't want to change it just because you also picked it out.

yatesbaby15 · April 2015

The good news is that your little girl is due first, so everyone will just think that she's the nutty one! I wouldn't worry about it, you came up with the name and maybe after she's born your cousin (for lack of a better term) will change her mind and realize how silly she is and come up with her own name

At least no one will think that you're the copy cat!

nikiaPSU · April 2015

Most people forget about the middle name after a little while so keep the name just as you and your husband picked out. It's special to you two, no one else matters.

KonaCoffeeBean · April 2015

I guess I don't see the big deal... She's a relative of a relative, and we're talking about a common first name/very common middle name. I think its a beautiful name, but that's just the trade off with popular names.

Destiny110 · April 2015

I hope that she understands. I don't know why she would want her daughter to have the same name. I want my daughter to be different from everyone else. If I was her I would have changed it in the beginning. A lot of people on my side of the family plan on calling her Ava Grace all together not just Ava. I wish I could change her name but it really is to late for me to do that now.. I have things monogrammed and I got ultrasounds done that have her name. We have been calling her that since I was about 16 weeks...

Destiny110 · April 2015

I also know she didnt have it picked out. I said something about Ava's name at my sisters baby shower and I know she heard me talking about it. When she found out she was having a girl she posted on Facebook about how they were trying to pick a name and everyone gave them different options and she said we both really like Ava Grace and that is when my sisters and aunt commented saying that we have already picked that and the fact she said yeah it is a pretty name just makes me so mad. I was going to just deal with it but if I dont say anything it is going to drive me crazy

virginiaunicorn11 · April 2015

Destiny110 said:
I got ultrasounds done that have her name.

I don't understand this statement, but you clearly love the name, so just keep it. Let the other lady be crazy. Hope talking to her does some good, but it sounds like she is committed to it. Maybe hide her on Facebook so it doesn't get you riled up. And have a standard line for when it comes up in conversation, as it inevitably will in a small town, I imagine. "Yeah, that crazy lady openly stole our beautiful name, what can ya do."

HoosOnFirst · April 2015

Destiny110 said:
I hope that she understands. I don't know why she would want her daughter to have the same name. I want my daughter to be different from everyone else. If I was her I would have changed it in the beginning. A lot of people on my side of the family plan on calling her Ava Grace all together not just Ava. I wish I could change her name but it really is to late for me to do that now.. I have things monogrammed and I got ultrasounds done that have her name. We have been calling her that since I was about 16 weeks...

I know you want your daughter to be "different" than everyone else but please be aware that Ava is currently in the top 10 girls names so you may need to get used to this specific issue.

mghershkowitz · April 2015

This happened to my mom with my brother years ago. Her cousin asked her what she was naming her son and my mom told her. The cousin was due first so she named him the name my mom had picked out. When my mom went to visit her at the hospital, (she knew she had stole my brothers name), so she wouldn't tell my mom what she named her son. My mom found out what happened and confronted her. She had no legitimate excuse about why she had, all she said was she liked that name too. :-@ . In the end my mom had to pick another name for my brother.

laurendutch · April 2015

I think there's a Seinfeld episode that is just like this...

)

gilder40 · April 2015

Ava Grace is pretty popular right now. I have a friend with a two-year old who is named Ava Grace.

Just keep it. Who gives a crap if she gets mad. You posted it first and had it picked out first.

Serenamarr · April 2015

laurendutch said:
I think there's a Seinfeld episode that is just like this... )

7!

Destiny110 · April 2015

I have not talked to Ashley, but I have decided to change her name in a way. Ava Grace will be her first name for a middle name we are thinking Elayne or Elizabeth.
Ava Grace Elayne.
Ava Grace Elizabeth.
What do yall think?

Westypet · April 2015

Elizabeth is a beautiful name!

karaelaine1991 · April 2015

Destiny110 said:
I have not talked to Ashley, but I have decided to change her name in a way. Ava Grace will be her first name for a middle name we are thinking Elayne or Elizabeth.
Ava Grace Elayne.
Ava Grace Elizabeth.
What do yall think?

My middle name is Elaine so I'm partial to that. Plus I think having an "a" sound in each name flows really nicely.

Good solution!

Destiny110 · April 2015

Thanks. We are still debating it.

KaLikeAWind · April 2015

I like the Elayne - even spelled that way. Normally not a fan of 'Y' where there is traditionally an "I", but in this case it is the name of a character in one of my favorite book series, and I like book character names. She's a great character too.

devyns2nd · April 2015

My brother is naming one of his twin girls ava Grace and the other Mia Rayne. Maybe it was an accident?

devyns2nd · April 2015

We were going to use Mia Grace or layla Grace but we are team blue.

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