Jealous of hubby ?!

Re: Jealous of hubby ?!

• SharLovesAlex member

  April 2015

  Is he going out all the time and leaving you at home? If so, you need to talk to him about how you feel. Maybe he can stay home while you go out for a bit!

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• nicolerae90 member

  April 2015

  Im jealous hubby gets to sleep. He works dsy shift..so i get up. He offers but no use i hear baby when she awakes..he doesnt. So i just do the get ups.

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• SharLovesAlex member

  April 2015

  @nicolerae90 Same here. He just sleeps right through it. I hear him and he doesn't, so I always get up.

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• soxgurl member

  April 2015

  Mine does the same. I don't know how he can not hear her. Sometimes I swear he pretends because he knows I'll get up.

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• EricandKaren member

  April 2015

  PP, A very good friend of ours (male) told me when we were pregnant with our first "if he tells you he doesn't hear the baby, he really truly doesn't! It doesn't mean we don't want to help, just wake us up and tell us to help! But don't blame us for not hearing... we just don't have the same mom-instinct that you girls apparently have".
  I believe him although I had the same feelings of annoyance when our first son was screaming in the middle of the night and my husband was snoring in my face. But I tried to remember what my friend had told us, and just would wake him up if I needed him to help!
  It stinks that they aren't programmed the same way we are but I try not to resent them for it

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• myjessesgirl member

  April 2015

  @EricandKaren Yes! My husband is completely sincere when he says he doesn't hear the baby at night. I already have had nighttime conversations with him that he does not remember the following morning, so I know his sleep is very different from mine. Definitely something to keep in mind when I'm feeling like he's just ignoring things. I think being pregnant trains us to be light sleepers that are more likely to respond to every moan, cry, or movement. Dads just don't respond the same way!

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• KD32412 member

  April 2015

  If you are well off financially, why don't you look into a reputable child care service so you can get help?

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• Streed1 member

  April 2015

  I am actually just jealous that my husband's life has barely changed in that he goes to work every day, goes to bed at 9 o'clock, and still has some fun on the weekend fishing. My entire life has changed and it is hard not to be jealous!

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• babyh310 member

  April 2015

  I can definitely relate to feeling frustrated and like it is unfair at how drastically every since second of your life has changed and how little his has changed in comparison. I think this is a stage where baby simply needs mama and there is by nature an imbalance in who is needed more. At the same time, baby is no more yours than his. Maybe you could discuss what all you have to do and he can let you know what he's willing to help with to take some of the load off and make you feel you are partners. Personally I get that my husband may physically be more available for time with friends or hobbies, but his presence at home makes me feel better and supported. Maybe if he could understand more where you're coming from emotionally and what you need from him, rather than seeing just your jealousy. We are all going to be fine! (I chant this to myself daily)

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• mamaskittles09 member

  April 2015

  That does sound frustrating! Since baby has come, I feel very anchored to being home. And I don't necessarily mean that as a bad thing-- I want us to enjoy these moments as a family as their so fleeting! And my husband does not feel the same. Off to the gym, the bar, spends entire days with his friends. I'm sorry I don't have much advice for you, but I can definitely relate!

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• Katiegreg2010 member

  April 2015

  This actually makes me feel better, because I can totally relate! I get so down about being chained to the house and so tired, not keeping up with things and not seeing people! Then I feel bad for feeling that way. Breastfeeding makes it worse, you really are at their mercy until a little later!

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• babystarin member

  April 2015

  We had our baby just in time for my husband to be able to see every Msu march madness game... He always said, "just let me know if I need to stay home" until he was out the door... He is terrible about keeping his phone on so I can't even get ahold of him unless I call his friend. Oh and each time he would go to watch a game he would be gone like 10-12 hours! On top of that I would have to go get him and bring him home... I told him this is not a 3 month vacation for him! He said yeah it is...
  
  They don't get what a change it is for us moms!

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