mother in law...

Re: mother in law...

• rosannewild member

  April 2015

  Can your husband take this one? I find with my mil that DH has much more range of expression than I do ( meaning that he can get heated with her without causing long term issues). I have to be more diplomatic. This may take a bigger stick.

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• leelee72 member

  April 2015

  I've been there done that and we no longer speak ro my.mil it's been almost 2 yrs. There is a point where u need to take a stand. Whether it's you or your husband. If you don't take a stand it will continue and get worse. It's sad frustrating situation. Good luck

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• babyswope member

  April 2015

  Thanks guys he's talked to her once because she wanted to put up a whole nursery in her house and I was like that's not happening so my husband talked to her and she cried and my husband ended up getting angry with me things had settled down some but now with only 47 days till our due date she's controlling again I'm going to end up blowing up if u haven't had anything to do with us and our relationship why would that change she's always on facebook talking about being a grandma and I understand it's very exciting but I feel like she's doing this all for attention! I just want my husband and I to share this special moment together and her no try to control things it's so frustrating

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• remingtonang member

  April 2015

  I always click on the mil posts. I have a doozy of an mil myself. She's very hard to deal with because she really has no idea how self absorbed and over bearing she can be. What tops it off is that she lives right next door. I've resorted to being rude to her to get her to leave sometimes and then she won't come over for a few days. I told my husband we need to start looking for a house farther away to salvage any sort of relationship with her. I don't want to push her out of our lives completely, she is human and we all have our little quirks of which I know I do too, but it's hard to know when, where and how to draw the line sometimes. It's unavoidable that she will get her feelings hurt but if it continues and you let it there's more chance of an outburst to happen which could destroy the relationship forever. I usually opt for my husband to do the dirty work when it's needed but I've realized that I also need to let her know my boundaries otherwise how can I fault her if I never express myself? Some people just really have absolutely no clue that they're being intrusive.

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• backwoodsbarbie2k15 member

  April 2015

  I just made a post recently about mine and our mother in law's sound pretty similar. My hopeful solution was that when DH stays at home the first few days after the hospital, he will see what kind of person shes going to be around the baby and he will put a stop to the hovering and other behaviors right then and there. Again, this is my hopeful solution... Dont know if it will work but it's worth a try! And it's easier than putting yourself in an uncomfortable situation with her. I'm a younger mom and I desperately need to figure out how to be a mom. I don't want her hovering and being a "know-it-all". But I can relate

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• babyswope member

  April 2015

  Goodness I felt like I was the only one with a mother in law like this lol or I thought maybe I was overreacting about it all even tho it still frustrated me! We actually live 5 minutes from my mother in law and we have lived at our house now for almost 3 years and she has been there 3 times!! When we first moved in another time to pick something up and then when we announced we were having a girl! So it's just hard for me to understand why it's gonna be different when we have the baby! I want her to be a part of the babies life i do but just needs to realize it's ours not hers and we are going to raise it how we please!

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• hirokotaki member

  April 2015

  My sister just had her first baby, and it sounds horrible experience with mil.
  Her husband both parents showed up in hospital without telling anybody. (I think it's husband's fault calling them)
  My sister are not that close to his parents.
  
  She did all natural birth.
  Our mom, husband, his parents are the same room watching rubbing her while she is in horrible labor.
  My mom told mil, "I got this", mil insist to rub her back.
  
  I think it's husband's fault to let it gets that uncomfortable situation and didn't tell them to wait outside. It's your baby, your moment, you should be in charge!

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