--- 2IF Weekly Check-in (April 5) ---

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

Sorry posting a day late, ladies. Work is kicking my butt right now.

Cycle Status:

QOTW: What helps you stay present when your little one(s) during your 2IF journey?

Jodee37 · April 2015

CD 14. no +opk yet.

QOTW: that's a really good question, LOL. let me know when you figure that out. i feel terribly guilty of not being as present as i should, pretty much all the time.

thanks for doing the check in ellebelle!

annibes · April 2015

I'm pretty sure today will be CD 1 so I'll start BCP Sunday. We're out for several months.

QOTW: realizing and accepting that there is a good possibility that DS will be our only child made me hyper-concerned that I had wasted a ton of time worrying and stressing over a hypothetical child when my baby was standing by, growing up. He's amazing. I want no regrets and to be sure I'm doing all I can to offer him success and happiness in his life.

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

CD who the f cares, just in holding until our PGD consult next Thursday.

QOTW: I asked this because I have been feeling really guilty about not focusing on DD now and thinking about a hypothetical future sibling, just like you stated @annibes. I've recently started setting aside 45 minute chunks of time at night between dinner and bedtime that are just for DD, no phone, no computers, doing whatever she chooses (most of the time puzzles right now). I find having a dedicated time in our day has helped a lot.

Flamingemu · April 2015

CD never going to happen.

QOTW: I used to be really good about no phones/computers when L was up since we had limited time between home from DCP/work and bed. Lately, I have been in a dark place, so I have been ignoring my responsibilities more than I like. I tend to put on a brave face and be super parent when she is awake and then just close off after bed time. That means I am good for my kid and neglecting my husband. It is amazing he even likes me these days.

I need to find a good balance between super mom and not present mom, but I am still working on it.

Jodee37 · April 2015

@annibes you took the words right out of my mouth.

efhoping2010 · April 2015

Cycle Status: On stim day 10 with daily monitoring us/ and b/w for IVF/ICSI #4 and feeling bloated and nauseous, I am on 450 iu total daily so that might be why! So far about 8 follicles total growing, we had hoped for 12 but with DOR I will take what I can get.. I might trigger tonight but more likely tomorrow night with ER on 4/11. DH might not have his PESA since he misunderstood that he needed a pre-op physical and bloodwork with the infertility urologist in Denver. My clinic called me frantic yesterday saying he has to do this so he is driving 6.5 hours here today and hopefully they can accomplish everything in time. They are making us sign an egg freezing consent form in case DH cannot have his PESA but that is basically catastrophic for my few eggs and age. Praying this all goes forward and we have embryos this weekend not just eggs.

NB817 · April 2015

efhoping2010 said:
Cycle Status: On stim day 10 with daily monitoring us/ and b/w for IVF/ICSI #4 and feeling bloated and nauseous, I am on 450 iu total daily so that might be why! So far about 8 follicles total growing, we had hoped for 12 but with DOR I will take what I can get.. I might trigger tonight but more likely tomorrow night with ER on 4/11. DH might not have his PESA since he misunderstood that he needed a pre-op physical and bloodwork with the infertility urologist in Denver. My clinic called me frantic yesterday saying he has to do this so he is driving 6.5 hours here today and hopefully they can accomplish everything in time. They are making us sign an egg freezing consent form in case DH cannot have his PESA but that is basically catastrophic for my few eggs and age. Praying this all goes forward and we have embryos this weekend not just eggs.

NB817 · April 2015

NB817 said:

efhoping2010 said:
Cycle Status: On stim day 10 with daily monitoring us/ and b/w for IVF/ICSI #4 and feeling bloated and nauseous, I am on 450 iu total daily so that might be why! So far about 8 follicles total growing, we had hoped for 12 but with DOR I will take what I can get.. I might trigger tonight but more likely tomorrow night with ER on 4/11. DH might not have his PESA since he misunderstood that he needed a pre-op physical and bloodwork with the infertility urologist in Denver. My clinic called me frantic yesterday saying he has to do this so he is driving 6.5 hours here today and hopefully they can accomplish everything in time. They are making us sign an egg freezing consent form in case DH cannot have his PESA but that is basically catastrophic for my few eggs and age. Praying this all goes forward and we have embryos this weekend not just eggs.

NB817 · April 2015

Okay sorry I tried to post a reply that obviously didn't work...stupid computer! @efhoping2010 I hope everything works out and that your H can do the PESA!! Keep us posted!

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

@efhoping2010 I really hope everything works out with your H! FX he can get everything done in time!

CTinNV · April 2015

Cycle: Waiting for AF then queuing up for cycle #3 in May

I only have my DS half the time since I share custody with my ex-husband. I enjoy planning special evenings with just him and me so he feels he has my direct attention. We do things together (my DH, DS and me) but I know my son enjoys our alone time too.

@efhoping2010 I really hope your DH has his PESA! Keep us updated!

Frenchteachermama · April 2015

Cycle status: First beta at 12dp3dt came back at 9

. So they made me go back for one more draw this morning to confirm it's not a viable pregnancy. I'm in a really bad place but each day is getting a little better. I filled out the adoption application we got back in February from Jewish Family Services and it's in the mail this morning. I'm not sure what the next step will be. I have my follow up next Wednesday. I have crappy eggs and a crappy uterus, but we have one more fresh round of our IVF package left. So we'll see what he says. I have a feeling he's going to want to repeat my surgery and then do our last fresh cycle.

QOTW: Like everyone else I've really struggled with this over the past few years. My daughters are absolutely amazing and I feel like I'm wasting time feeling so depressed about having another child that i'm not as present as I could be. IF treatments give you all of this hope but also a lot sadness and stress...I feel like I'm coming towards the end of my TTC journey.

fuzzbumble · April 2015

Huge hugs @Frenchteachermama Love and hugs.

Davie813 · April 2015

@Frenchteachermama, I'm so sorry. Thinking of you.

@efhoping2010, I hope your husband is able to get his PESA. Good luck!

Cycle status: had ER Tuesday. 12/15 fertilized. I think the tentative plan is to transfer Sunday, but that assumes enough of the embryos make it that long. I'm also still considering doing a freeze-all until next month.

QOTW: Yeah, I struggle with this, too. I honestly think it's hard even for people who aren't dealing with 2IF to feel as present as they should, though. I don't know what it's like to have older kids yet, but babies' and toddlers' needs are so all-encompassing that it's hard not to pull back sometimes just as a self-preservation thing because if you don't get a little bit of down time you'll go absolutely insane. Or maybe that's just me.

NB817 · April 2015

Oh @Frenchteachermama I am so very sorry! Sending you a great big hug!

NB817 · April 2015

CD: I have no clue. I'm on BCPs because my surgeon wanted me on them before surgery but I keep bleeding anyway??? He has me skipping the placebo week so I shouldn't be bleeding but I am like every 3 weeks...WTF!! I had my pre op appointment yesterday with him and of course I forgot to ask about it. SMH.

QOTW: I think this is something that we all struggle with. DD is at such a fun and funny age so I really try to focus on paying attention to all the growing and learning she's doing because if she IS the only child we are able to have I want to make sure I don't miss out on this fun stage. That's the logic I use to try to keep myself present for her.

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

@frenchteachermama so many ((hugs))

@NB817 could you call to ask your doctor about it? I would be really pissed off at my body about that.

jen4ny · April 2015

I'm sorry @Frenchteachermama.

jen4ny · April 2015

CD 2. This will be another natural cycle for us. I hope you don't mind me sticking around here with these natural cycles. We were going to give this until June and then consult for IVF. But the IVF was going to be paid for by my extremely generous parents because we just don't have the finances right now. With my mom gone IVF is off the table- unless we win the lotto or something like that. So for now we are on our own.

QOTW- It is definitely hard to not get distracted by 2IF and try to just enjoy DS. I think I am getting a little better at it. I am starting to accept that he may be our only child and that I better enjoy him now before he gets too big.

Kelley421 · April 2015

@FTM- I am so sorry- big hugs!

Cycle status: CD 16 waiting to ovulate. No clue what's going on with body as every time I've tracked its O on CD 14 of 28d cycle. This month no O or signs of it, last month 23d cycle. I would like CD 1 to get here and get IUI#3 underway.

QOTW: My little one isn't quite so little any more, nearly 9 going on 16, toting her purse to school, wearing dangling earrings. Last year when we were riding the crazy train with blighted ovum (it's a chemical, it's ectopic, it's normal, it's no good, D&C- I was a basket case) I neglected her and it really showed with her grades that period of school. I realized I was at fault for being mentally absent, and I haven't checked out since.

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

Of course stick around @jen4ny! Again, I'm so sorry about your mom. IVF is OOP for us too and it's taken us a long time to get here. Totally understandable that the plan has changed now. (hugs)

Flamingemu · April 2015

@jen4ny that is so tough. Sorry for your mom. Natural cycles still qualify as 2IF!

Frenchteachermama · April 2015

Beta yesterday was 14, just high enough to stay in beta hell until Saturday. I have to go into the office on Saturday for another draw and then things should be over. Thanks for all of your support! Sorry I can't respond to everyone individually, my head isn't in the right space...

Davie813 · April 2015

@jen4ny, please do stick around! I'm so sorry about your mom.

@frenchteachermama, I'm sorry for the continued beta hell. I had kind of the same thing going on this fall--an initial beta of 10 that did double and triple for awhile, but never quite enough to get out of the woods. While it was going on, people sent lots of low beta success stories my way, and while it didn't turn out well for me, there are plenty of them out there. I really hope you'll have one of the good outcomes. Hang in there!

Frenchteachermama · April 2015

Beta was 16 today so it's officially over.

Jodee37 · April 2015

@frenchteachermama i am so so very sorry. sending you so much love and light. please know you are not alone and we are here to support you.

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

So many ((hugs)) @Frenchteachermama

jen4ny · April 2015

Hugs @Frenchteachermama. I am so sorry.

1983Lindsey2 · April 2015

@efhoping2010 FX for you!
@Frenchteachermama I am so sorry

That is so so hard. I hope your consult goes well for your last IVF of your package.
@Davie813 FX that those 12 embryos keep growing

@NB817 wishing you good luck on your upcoming surgery!
@jen4ny I want you here

I am so sorry about your mom. That is so very very hard.

I am just chugging along with my weight loss waiting until June 10th for my IVF consult. Still no AF and I stopped pumping 3 months ago. I wasn't really expecting it since my pituitary gland doesn't really work, but I was secretly kinda hoping for a miracle after this pregnancy. I should have gotten the clue when I didn't make enough prolactin to make enough breast milk. I would only get max 6 oz a day even with prescription meds. Anyhow, I am excited about my appointment and just want to get going on my IVF cycle this summer.

QOTW: I worry/fantasize about this next IVF cycle and the hopes for a sibling. We only have enough money for one shot at this so it worries me quite a bit. I have a high follicle count so that is good, but worrying still takes up a lot of my thoughts. I don't think it really keeps me from being present, but when the treatments start, it will be a challenge to think about much else.

ellebelle2384 · April 2015

Sorrry about the no AF @1983Lindsey2. It sounds like you're doing good with focusing on your health in the meantime while waiting for your appt. though.

Davie813 · April 2015

I'm so sorry, @Frenchteachermama.

Want a personalized experience?

--- 2IF Weekly Check-in (April 5) ---

Re: --- 2IF Weekly Check-in (April 5) ---

Choose Another Board

Search Boards