When did you/will you tell? Nervously excited...

LittleRocket · March 2015

Hello! I'm almost at 12 weeks, so the idea of telling people is on my mind. I've put on a lot of weight already, so it's hard to hide. I'll be flying back east at 13 weeks. I'd like to tell my friends bast east then- I think they will guess anyway, since I look more pregnant than I am. I'd love to try to feel "normal" and celebrate, and let myself really believe that I'm actually pregnant. I think telling people could be a step in that direction. Our very immediate family already knows. I'm just still so nervous that something might go wrong, or has already gone wrong, and I just don't know it. I had a good ultrasound at 10 weeks- lots of movement and a strong heartbeat. I go back at 14 weeks for another. I've been thinking about asking for an elective ultrasound right before I leave, to help me feel better, but I kinda feel like maybe that's over the top & a waste of money. I'm just scared that something has happened with the baby between the ultrasounds & I don't know it. What is your plan? Anyone else feeling this way? Thanks!!!

gsancho · March 2015

I always had a lot of anxiety telling people. When we finally posted a short message on Facebook, I cried all afternoon worried I jinxed it. But since we were open with our IF struggles and IVF, we didn't necessarily hide it and told people as they asked. But everyone is different. I've seen some ladies tell around 12-14 weeks, others wait until 20 weeks. If you are feeling like it's time, I'd say go for it.

It kinda helped me to feel more optimistic once I saw everyone's positive reactions. I usually worked in a comment about being excited but nervous since it took so long to get here, and that helped most people understand why I wasn't all confetti and rainbows when talking about the pregnancy.

J&D2007 · March 2015

We still haven't said anything and don't plan to until Easter, which will be 20 weeks for us. I assume some people I work with everyday have guessed but not said anything. Due to the long, cold winter, we haven't really seen friends or family for a few months so I haven't had to do much hiding. I feel a little like I'm jinxing it if I say something and the thought of untelling people if something goes wrong terrifies me. I don't know if I will ever feel ready, but my belly is getting obvious so I'll be forced to! Everyone is different and 13 weeks is definitely not too early to tell people, I'm just a chicken!

katers79 · March 2015

All of our close friends and family knew about IVF, so they knew right away. We made the official announcement at 12 wks. I'm carrying twins so things were bigger earlier-- it was hard to not spill the beans!

MiromiM · March 2015

A few, select people knew about out IVF journey. Last week (after my 12 week US), I posted to facebook and told the world both about our pregnancy and about our IVF journey. I was surprised at all the positive responses especially from my friends who are super religious.

LittleRocket · March 2015

Thank you for the replies! I'm trying to schedule an NT test for next week, so that would result in an ultrasound & some news. If I can schedule it & I get good news, I think I'll tell at 13 weeks, though even saying that makes me queasy! Thanks again!

kkac714 · March 2015

I'm only 4 weeks and my parents know. But we will wait until 12 weeks to tell everyone.

1220winterbride · March 2015

I waited until I was pretty far along but I have a history of loss / superstitious. I wanted to scream from the rooftops sometimes but I really forced myself to wait.

Everyone is unique and there is no "right" time

. Some people never do a FB post. I did! It was happy to hear all of the loving responses.

zeynsom · March 2015

Our close family and friends knew about our IVF journey and our transfer date so they knew immediately with beta. Since then I told two other colleagues (because the three who knew, me and them were getting together for a ladies' night and I knew somebody was going to spill the beans). That was at 10w. I am getting my NT scan next week (12w) and also am supposed to get the blood test results for the genetic information. If everything is clear from those tests/u/s I am planning to tell my boss and talk about the parental leave and be open about it to others as well.

kfb1981 · March 2015

Im struggling with this right now. I'm 15 weeks, but only my family knows. I had a chance to tell my friends a few days ago when we were all together, but I couldn't find the words to blurt it out. I thought I would be do excited to tell the world, but I just don't feel that way. I've been open with my family about our struggles, but not so much with friends. No one ever asked and I didn't bring it up for fear of becoming a blubbering mess. Now I think people just don't expect me to ever get pregnant. I know my friends "know" I've had IF issues, but no one has ever brought it up for fear of upsetting or hurting me.

So now I don't know how to share my news, or if I'm even ready. I really don't want to announce on FB, I'm a pretty private person. I'd like to tell some friends in person, but I'm running out of time before I start showing.

Any advice?

przemosbabe · April 2015

I'm almost 11 weeks and my close family and a few friends know. I won't tell anyone else, I'm going to wait until it's obvious. I won't be announcing on Facebook at all.

LittleRocket · April 2015

Well, preliminarily, the NT went well! The doctor who did the NT says my regular ob will tell me the complete results once he gets my bloodwork back, but the numbers from just the NT are good! Seeing the baby looking bigger and stronger made me feel much better. Long story short, I'm going to dip a toe into telling people. My best friend & our immediate family already know & have been through each step of the ivf journey with us. Today, we'll email the larger family. When we go to the easy coast on Tuesday, I'll be 13 weeks & I'll tell friends there. I think I'll wait to tell friends and work people out here in CA until I get back & will be at 14 weeks. It still makes me very nervous, but it's also exciting. It's making me less nervous to tell people over email rather than in person. I think we'll hold off on a FB post or anything for a while.

kfb1981- I don't really have any big advice, but I'd say do what feels right! If you are very private, don't feel pressured to do a big announcement of FB post. I'm sure word will spread. Good luck!

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When did you/will you tell? Nervously excited...

Re: When did you/will you tell? Nervously excited...

Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motility
IUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFN
IVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!!
Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545 -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!

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Want a personalized experience?

When did you/will you tell? Nervously excited...

Re: When did you/will you tell? Nervously excited...

Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motilityIUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFNIVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!!Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545 -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!

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Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motility
IUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFN
IVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!!
Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545 -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!