October 2015 Moms

UO

Ok ladies, it's Thursday. Let's hear your Unpopular Opinions. 

Beware that what you say could get you flamed. 
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Rainbow Baby born 12/14/13

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Re: UO

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  • I just posted this in another thread but I think that prenatal appts before 10/12 weeks aren't medically necessary w/o a history of loss and I think doctors do them to prey on our anxieties but most of all to bill insurance as much as possible.
  • Telebell said:

    I just posted this in another thread but I think that prenatal appts before 10/12 weeks aren't medically necessary w/o a history of loss and I think doctors do them to prey on our anxieties but most of all to bill insurance as much as possible.

    I can agree with this. There is nothing that can be screened for in the 1st tri and unfortunately if something goes wrong they can't do anything to prevent it at this point. 
    image
    Rainbow Baby born 12/14/13



  • I don't like the term natural childbirth. I think it should be called unmedicated childbirth.



    Thank you! I completely agree!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 

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    Me: 25, DH: 28
    Married: July 2012
    DS: December 2013 
    TTC #2 since July 2014 
    M/C: March 2015 
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  • @sugarplum513 I didn't realize. I'm glad that your doctor caught it early. I hope things progress in your pregnancy without complication.
    image
    Rainbow Baby born 12/14/13

  • I think it's dumb the same topics get posted about over and over again. There's a search feature for a reason. Search first to see what moms said in other posts before making everything be repeated.

    Completely agree. I also hate when people are asking medical questions. For instance, "I'm bleeding and cramping, what should I do?" Go see a doctor! I am all for helpful tips and thoughts, but we are not certified to be giving medical advice.
  • I think it's dumb the same topics get posted about over and over again. There's a search feature for a reason. Search first to see what moms said in other posts before making everything be repeated.

    Completely agree. I also hate when people are asking medical questions. For instance, "I'm bleeding and cramping, what should I do?" Go see a doctor! I am all for helpful tips and thoughts, but we are not certified to be giving medical advice.
    I have no problem if people want to tell us their problems just for support but yes, I totally agree don't ask us what to do! Call your doctor. When I had bleeding my first thought wasn't let's ask the women of the bump what I should do. I was instantly on the phone with my doctor.
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    Me: 25, DH: 28
    Married: July 2012
    DS: December 2013 
    TTC #2 since July 2014 
    M/C: March 2015 
    My Ovulation Chart
  • Telebell said:

    I just posted this in another thread but I think that prenatal appts before 10/12 weeks aren't medically necessary w/o a history of loss and I think doctors do them to prey on our anxieties but most of all to bill insurance as much as possible.

    While I mostly agree with you here, I'll add to the list that for women without regular cycles an early u/s is beneficial. When I went in for my first appointment according to LMP I was almost 11 weeks but knew I wasn't that far (I was only 8w1d). Early u/s are good for dating purposes too. I also tried for 5.5 years to get pregnant, I fully feel like I paid my dues.
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    Little Slick
    Born 6.26.10
    Forever a Family 11.26.12

  • Married 8/2012
    DS born 12/2013 @ 41w2d
    BFP #2 EDD 10/2015

  • I came here to find a community, but I have so much trouble relating to so much of what is said on this board that being here often makes me feel lonelier.

    Whatcha mean? Examples?
    image
    Little Slick
    Born 6.26.10
    Forever a Family 11.26.12
  • replied
    image
    Rainbow Baby born 12/14/13



  • I don't like the term natural childbirth. I think it should be called unmedicated childbirth

    Why? So you can relabel how birth was originally done just to feel better about your "medicated birth?" Get over it. Un-medicated is the natural way mammals and humans did it since the start of time. Medication came around we all got a chance at a mostly painless intervention but it isn't natural, a cow isn't out there giving herself an epidural. Balls up and accept the fact that medication is an intervention and stop crying about labels.
  • Mrs.Slick said:

    I came here to find a community, but I have so much trouble relating to so much of what is said on this board that being here often makes me feel lonelier.

    Whatcha mean? Examples?
    I don't want to get into specific examples. I just feel that, aside from being pregnant, I don't really have anything in common with most people here and can't make sense of their life choices. I guess being pregnant is supposed to be enough in common.

    Anyway, if the board were populated entirely with people like me, no one would ever start threads, so it's good there aren't more of me around!

  • Carmofrap said:



    I don't like the term natural childbirth. I think it should be called unmedicated childbirth

    Why? So you can relabel how birth was originally done just to feel better about your "medicated birth?" Get over it. Un-medicated is the natural way mammals and humans did it since the start of time. Medication came around we all got a chance at a mostly painless intervention but it isn't natural, a cow isn't out there giving herself an epidural. Balls up and accept the fact that medication is an intervention and stop crying about labels.



    If a woman has an epidural vaginal birth it doesn't make her experience unnatural. It means she had pain relief.  And a medically necessary C-section isn't unnatural either. A healthy baby/healthy mom is what is important. 

    Labeling it "natural" is editorial and unnecessary. Are hospital births unnatural because woman had home births in the 1800s? How far are you wiling to take it?  I suggest you take your own advice and get off your high horse.

  • I KNOW this opinion is unpopular with TB, but I don't have any problem with baby showers for babies #2 and beyond. A shower is supposed to welcome you to motherhood? What? So if no one bothers to throw you one, you're not welcomed?

    I thinks it's about the BABY, not the mom. It's not about getting presents to me, either. Who says you have to get a lot of big-ticket items? Just give diapers and eat pink or blue cupcakes.

    That being said, don't throw your own shower. That is tacky.

    Anyway, just my opinion.

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  • "Un-medicated is the natural way mammals and humans did it since the start of time."

    My UO: this UO drives me nuts. Childbirth also used to be incredibly dangerous and women died. Natural doesn't always mean better or safer.

    Never said it was safer or better!!! Please tell me where I said that since you just love jumping to conclusions. I simply pointed out that pain medication was not a natural part of birth years ago. Just said that's what natural is. To
    say oh an epidural doesn't change it from being natural is to say
    that pain is not a natural part of birth. Sorry, Natural is the way it's
    been done since the start of time. Throw an intervention of any kind in
    there and it is no longer the "natural and original way our body was
    designed to birth" And for the record birth is still incredibly
    dangerous especially in the united states. We have the worst outcomes
    for maternal and fetal of almost all developed nations so that argument
    is still as stupid now as it was when doctors took over births and
    killed women in droves because "gentlemen don't have germs" and not
    washing their hands had nothing to do with child-bed fever that claimed a
    disgusting amount of lives when the switch from midwifery to hospital
    care was made.
  • Telebell said:

    I just posted this in another thread but I think that prenatal appts before 10/12 weeks aren't medically necessary w/o a history of loss and I think doctors do them to prey on our anxieties but most of all to bill insurance as much as possible.

    While I agree, I did have one at 6w2d for dating purposes. We had no idea at all how far along I was because I hadnt had a cycle since coming off bc. So I feel like that was a bit necessary to even know when 10/12 weeks would be :)

    My UO:
    Hospitals here are too happy to shove a needle into a spine. Back home, only 10% of women gets an epidural, where here I've heard its close to 90%. Everything is very different here too, its seen as such a medical and clinical thing.. for us, we're always taught from a young age that yes, its going to hurt, and you'll be able to deal with it. Not saying the way here is wrong perse, its just a very big difference that sticks out to me, and personally if a doctor even has the nerve to mention the word epidural he can either back out slowly while apologizing profusely, or get thrown out the damn window.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Carmofrap said:


    "Un-medicated is the natural way mammals and humans did it since the start of time."

    My UO: this UO drives me nuts. Childbirth also used to be incredibly dangerous and women died. Natural doesn't always mean better or safer.

    Never said it was safer or better!!! Please tell me where I said that since you just love jumping to conclusions. I simply pointed out that pain medication was not a natural part of birth years ago. Just said that's what natural is. To
    say oh an epidural doesn't change it from being natural is to say
    that pain is not a natural part of birth. Sorry, Natural is the way it's
    been done since the start of time. Throw an intervention of any kind in
    there and it is no longer the "natural and original way our body was
    designed to birth" And for the record birth is still incredibly
    dangerous especially in the united states. We have the worst outcomes
    for maternal and fetal of almost all developed nations so that argument
    is still as stupid now as it was when doctors took over births and
    killed women in droves because "gentlemen don't have germs" and not
    washing their hands had nothing to do with child-bed fever that claimed a
    disgusting amount of lives when the switch from midwifery to hospital
    care was made.
    To me, saying "balls up and accept that medication is an intervention", as you did in an earlier post, implies you think it is better. I was replying to that.

    As for maternal mortality rates in the US, I agree that the number is way too high. But I don't think the evidence points to these rates being caused by medical intervention, as they did in the 1800s. Sepsis, infection, and hemorrhage rates are all down. To me, the higher rate of maternal mortality has more to do with the poor medical system in general in the US and the fact that many women cannot get good pre-natal care. 

    As for pain management, I applaud all women who choose to birth medication free. I tend to lean towards the belief that pain management came about because there was demand for it from women. And having spoken to women who have done it both ways, I'm planning on getting on epidural. And that doesn't make my birth plan better or worse than yours. Just different.
  • I stand corrected- if you have a medical condition that requires early appts then by all means!

    Apparently dating ultrasounds are most accurate between 8-11 weeks anyways, which would correspond with a reasonable first apt.

    But in the U.S. there's this race to more and earlier intervention and before you know it standard low-risk pregnancies are seen at 7 weeks, then 6 weeks and so on. And then you don't see a heartbeat sometimes and mom understandably freaks out. And all our insurance costs go up!
  • I'm so sad that women like to tear other women down. I want to leave this group often but then realize there are just a few bad seeds and most people are mature, wonderfully supportive woman. I think I will stay off these threads.

    Just to warn you, this is mild in terms of an UO thread. FFFC's can get heated too.
    image
    Little Slick
    Born 6.26.10
    Forever a Family 11.26.12
  • I know and it's only my issue. If I don't want to read it, I shouldn't open something like this thread. Lol. Pregnancy hormones just make me sadder than normal.
  • @MelMel92 I agree with your UO! I've been subjected to spinal taps, and they've terrified me against having an epidural. My mom skipped it with all of her kids and she keeps telling me I'll be fine without. I was shocked today to see that my hospital checklist from my doc includes preregistration with the anesthesiologist. Unnecessary.
  • @cgummie I'm so glad I'm not the only one!! Where I'm from, women have only been able to get an epidural without medical necessity since 2008, so obviously my mom didnt get one with me either. I'd be the first in my family to get one, and I just really dont want it! I've always been terrified of a needle going into my spine, especially during labor! WHAT IF I MOVE?! No thanks. I could go into a panic attack just thinking about it, while I'm fine thinking about child birth.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • frantastic12frantastic12 member
    edited March 2015
    Mrs.Slick said:

    I'm so sad that women like to tear other women down. I want to leave this group often but then realize there are just a few bad seeds and most people are mature, wonderfully supportive woman. I think I will stay off these threads.

    Just to warn you, this is mild in terms of an UO thread. FFFC's can get heated too.
    But this is The "Better Experience" Bump. 

    YGPM Mrs.Slick



    Married 8/2012
    DS born 12/2013 @ 41w2d
    BFP #2 EDD 10/2015

  • Mrs.Slick said:

    I'm so sad that women like to tear other women down. I want to leave this group often but then realize there are just a few bad seeds and most people are mature, wonderfully supportive woman. I think I will stay off these threads.

    Just to warn you, this is mild in terms of an UO thread. FFFC's can get heated too.
    But this is The "Better Experience" Bump. 

    YGPM Mrs.Slick


    image
    image
    Rainbow Baby born 12/14/13

  • Mrs.Slick said:

    I'm so sad that women like to tear other women down. I want to leave this group often but then realize there are just a few bad seeds and most people are mature, wonderfully supportive woman. I think I will stay off these threads.

    Just to warn you, this is mild in terms of an UO thread. FFFC's can get heated too.
    But this is The "Better Experience" Bump. 

    YGPM Mrs.Slick


    Back at ya!
    image
    Little Slick
    Born 6.26.10
    Forever a Family 11.26.12
  • I'm getting really tired of the women who have had to wait long periods of time to conceive tearing down the women that didn't have to wait. You have every right to be frustrated and jealous. (Yes, that's what you are and I would be too!) But just because you had to wait 5 plus years to conceive or had to find different methods and I conceived without trying, doesn't make my pregnancy any less valuable than yours. All of these babies are special and all of them mean something very important to us.  Its not our fault that your body is different from ours or that you had to go through the pain. I am by no means belittling your situation, but if you expect us to feel the sympathy for you (which we do), we should be able to expect the same sort of respect for our situations.  Every pregnancy is different, and every pregnancy is special. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @MelMel92

    Fellow non-believer here. I get around people bugging me by just never telling anyone, which feels dishonest but spares me a lot of headaches. I'm preparing myself for some family battles once this kid is born.

    Anyway, just wanted to let you know you're not by yourself here.
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