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July 2015 Moms
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Gender disappointment?

happybaby1121happybaby1121 member
in July 2015 Moms
I feel bad about feeling this way but I was really hoping for a boy and just found out it's a girl. I considered waiting to find out the gender to avoid this but everyone talked me out of it and I also kind of wanted to know to prepare. I know I should be happy as long as everythings healthy but I can't help it.
Has anyone had similar reactions?
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Re: Gender disappointment?

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  • ewdeanewdean member
    My first time around I was disappointed that we were having a boy right at first. It didn't last long though and then I was really excited. Of course now, I couldn't imagine having had a girl first. He's a good big brother to his sister and he's getting another sister this time!
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  • blukatsblukats member
    I went through this, this time around. My first is a boy and I really wanted a girl this time. I thought one of each would be nice and we would be done, needlesa to say we found baby 2 is also a boy. I was a little bummed at first but now that I've started picking things out and decorating I'm really excited amf that feeling has passed.
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  • SanineSanine member
    First pregnancy I wanted a girl, I was convinced it was a girl. When I found out it was a boy I cried and was feeling even more disconnected from the pregnancy. After a few days I came around and now would never trade my boy in for anything.
    I think its normal.

    Give yourself a week and maybe by then you will feel better about having girl.
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  • gatormom73gatormom73 member
    This same happened to me but I was told I was having a boy early on so at anatomy scan when I was told that it was a girl I cried. I have no idea why I was crying because I was so and am so thankful to be pregnant. I think I was just so prepared for a boy that it was a complete shock. Also because my whole family wanted me to have a boy since there hasnt been a boy for 44 yrs. So I think I was more upset because I knew my whole family wanted a boy. Im absolutely thrilled to be having a lil girl now tho. I just had to process it.
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  • gotdiesel2007gotdiesel2007 member
    I'm still having issues and I found out over a month ago. This is boy #3 so I was really hoping for a girl this time. I'm over not having a girl but not in a debate if I wanna even try again and possibly deal with the disappointment again since 4 is our final number no matter what.
    DS #1 Born 01/23/09
    Married 03/18/10
    DS #2 Born 05/19/11
    DS #3 Due 07/26/15


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  • kdnelson10kdnelson10 member
    This is our first baby but I think DH was pretty disappointed that we weren't having a boy first. I always saw myself having a boy first also but didn't actually have a preference. After the initial surprise and talking to some of his buddies with girls he is coming around. Going to be daddy's girl for sure.
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  • SMP21606SMP21606 member
    We have had girls first in my family, and I was really hoping for a boy to start my children out. I had always wanted boys first and then my last child to be a girl. I found out I was having a girl and while I was so happy to have a healthy and normal pregnancy I couldn't help but be sad that I wasn't having a boy. I was the only one in my family that wanted him, everyone else wanted a girl. They got their wish. But since this is our first I know we will have an opportunity to have more and next time hopefully it will be a boy. I found out a few weeks ago and I am still a little bummed. it's totally normal, don't feel like you have to feel any other way about it.
    [url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt1c846a.aspx[/img][/url] 
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  • BAYOUWIFEBAYOUWIFE member
    I think it is normal. I have a DD and really wanted a second girl, but God had other plans. I started shopping for him and that is helping me get more excited and use to the idea of having a boy. My friend just had her third boy and she cried for awhile after the gender ultrasound.
    BFP 10/31/12, MC 11/9/12 - We had to say goodbye before we could really say hello. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • chantellbroussardchantellbroussard member
    Twice we got pregnant and both myself and my oldest, a girl, wanted another girl so badly. My daughter was heartbroken both times they announced it was a boy. I felt so sad and heartbroken. I adore my boys but I really wanted another girl. This is baby #5 for us and FINALLY it's another girl. I was so excited I sat up and shouted with my arms in the air when she said it was a girl. Lol. The heart wants what it wants. All the people that say things about "you just just want a healthy baby.." And blah blah blah, are ignorant if they think people don't want a healthy child. I think it can be normal to really desire a certain sex. I honestly thought I would be absolutely depressed if it was another boy.
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  • oneblessedmessoneblessedmess member
    It happens more often than you think. I don't think I'm allowed to post the website, but if you google "gender disappointment forum" there are entire boards dedicated to people helping each other deal with gender disappointment. The vast majority of them say the feelings went away when they met their child, if not long before. Like PP said, as long as it's not so bad that you're experiencing symptoms of depression or serious negative feelings toward your child, it will go away.

    I was also mildly hoping for a boy and we are having a girl. Now I'm thinking about all the fun things that come with having a girl. Like how girls tend to be more fun to clothes shop for, and I can read her all the girly books I loved as a kid, and my sister and I have already discussed taking her to the American Girl store! :) Plus girls don't forcefully pee on you while you are trying to change them LOL.
    Anniversary 
     
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Pregnancy Ticker
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  • bmills14bmills14 member
    I cried on and off for almost a whole week when we found out this baby is ANOTHER boy. My husband and I each have a boy from previous relationships and he had lost his daughter, he hoped and prayed for this one to be a little girl but God had different plans for us :) now we are more than excited that it's a boy!
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  • rachellemonsrachellemons member
    I was really scared to ask or tell anyone how disappointed I am that we are having a girl. I'm glad I'm not alone. I've just always wanted to be a mom of only boys. I thought it would be wonderful to be the only female in the family plus I am terrified of raising a hormonal girl :( basically right now I am just trying to be excited about all the things I can get her and I know once she is here I will look back and laugh at myself.
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  • inLOVEalready715inLOVEalready715 member
    Don't be hard on yourself, any feelings you're having are normal. Of course you're happy that the baby is healthy. sometimes you just need a day or two to let it sink in.
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  • happybaby1121happybaby1121 member
    Thanks everyone :) I just always pictured my first being a boy and have always gotten along better with boys than girls. My family also has a lot of girls and would have really been excited for a boy. I'm also more fond of all the cute little boy clothes. But girls have such fun personalities and I still feel attached to this little kicker inside, so I am sure I just need some time to let it settle in because I was so convinced of what it was before I knew. Thanks for all the support!
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