Monday bitchfest

cpage2211 · March 2015

Lordy, I need this today. So im starting real early.

Hubby is quitting smoking, finally. I quit wen I found out we were expecting. I'm elated and have tried to not get on his last nerve to make him want to go and buy a pack. But when he speaks to me like I am dumb or like I am a child, I do not do well with holding in my inner boss bitch. She comes out. He immediately yells as a reaction to everything and come to think of it, has been doing this for weeks so it has nothing to do with quitting smoking.

We have so much to get done before LO gets here and I have to take the initiative to jump start anything. I am a major diyer and would love to be able to just do everything my damn self. I bought tiles to have hubby put down for our entryway. It was finally done!! I asked him to take the shelving down in my 9 year olds soon to be room the next day and he said he would. When the next day came and I asked him when he would do it, he raised his voice because "it's his day off". So I went in there and started taking shit off the walls. Eventually he came in and started demoing a piece with a hammer but instead the piece fell towards me and hit me in the stomach. My stomach reacted and tightened. Then a few minutes later he says "Well, why would you stand so close, you saw me with the hammer. What did you think I was going to do?" Yes. You're right. It's all my fault. Ass.

I'm not sure what's gotten into him lately. I try and talk to him about things and he just says he doesn't care about other peoples drama. We don't talk at all anymore. I feel really disconnected. Like I'm just here to give him kids, raise them, do his laundry and make his meals. And speaking of laundry!!!!.....I washed and folded his laundry yesterday. This morning it's all unfolded because he couldn't find a certain shirt he wanted. What. The. Fuck. Man. Now I have to fold it again, otherwise I'll be washing clean clothes because they look dirty.

I have more, but I think I will just end this here because this has gotten long enough.

jmorneau09 · March 2015

I'm sorry. My hubby seems to go through something like this at some point with every baby. I know that doesn't justify the behavior or necessarily make u feel any better but I do completely understand what your feeling. Hope it gets better!

cpage2211 · March 2015

Thanks @jmorneau09 I've just been feeling really down and defeated lately

I'm also not usually one to come on to these forums and completely blast my personal drama everywhere, but I needed to get this out.

PutMeintheZoo · March 2015

No. More. Snow. Please! [kicking, screaming, crying, stomping]

MissRissx3 · March 2015

Yeah, my hubs and I argued constantly for a good three weeks straight. We've been so damn stressed out! Our dryer broke, stove broke, brakes are horrible in the truck and our sump pump is out. All in like two fucking weeks! So we've both been assholes to each other. We didn't even have sex for like 2 weeks because we were SO disconnected. I felt so alone that whole time while he seemed content with not getting things done. We've talked since then and now we see each other's side. Hope everything gets much better for you! @cpage2211

SmrBrd2012 · March 2015

Things haven't been too bad with H other than his intense work schedule. His in-laws however are a different story...

This weekend they came down to visit and here are the things that annoyed the hell out of me:
1) FIL won't take his shoes off when he comes in our house even though (finally) everyone else has learned to do so. I know some people hate to do this so I try not to force them and usually let H deal with it. But he went into our carpeted nursery that we JUST rented a deep clean carpet appliance to clean not 3 days before. And it's gross out with the snow and the salt and who knows what else.

2) FIL proceeded to tell me where I should put our crib even thought it's where we want it.

3) BIL demanded to know what name we decided on for our son for about an hour. Then he started listing off names trying to get a response. One of the ones he listed is the only one H and I have sort of agreed on and he said "don't name him that"! Then he just started calling the baby Jonathan for the rest of the time for no reason.

4) BIL also has decided that he's super curious if I'm going to breastfeed in public and so we all decided to have a convo about that for about 10 minutes. Like why is that any of your business??

5) H spent $100 on take-out for the 6 of us. I've been so stressed out
about saving money that this hit me hard. $100 on food for one day! That
could've been groceries! Ugh.

sbride68 · March 2015

@PutMeInTheZoo I totally agree! I am sick sick sick of snow and cold!! and the fact that it makes my light bill horrendous having to run the heat so much!

My bitchfest for the day is ongoing from last week. After finding out that I wasn't getting the baby shower that my sil said she was having for me just because she didn't want to, I had a friend step up and say that she wanted to host one for us so that we would still get one with friends and family from my husbands hometown. I told her that DH and I would help with some of the costs and stuff because she is a single mother of two and doesn't need to pay for everything because showers can be expensive. So I went ahead and set up the event on Facebook to give people a heads up that the invitations would be in the mail soon. DH's aunt messaged me and asked why I was hosting my own shower and that I should have my friend host one for friends and then she would have one for us with family once the baby arrived. I told her that my friend was the one hosting not me and that I had just set up the event for her on fb. well I eventually ended up deleting the event off FB so it wouldn't stir any more drama or anything and decided just to send invitations to our friends instead. I told his aunt if she would like to have something after the baby is born then that was fine it would be fun. so we will see if that even happens. his family is very inconsistent on following through with plans like this so I am not getting my hopes up. I just don't get what the big deal is about having a shower before the baby is born and apparently his family is against that idea. I get people wanting to see the baby after she is born but they act like we all have to get together or I'm going to lock myself and the baby in our house and not let anyone see her. I don't really like the idea of her being passed around at a party right after she is born. Her immune system wont be super strong and she isn't a doll or anything like that. Am I wrong for feeling like that? Or does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?

lola2bee · March 2015

sbride68 said:
@PutMeInTheZoo I totally agree! I am sick sick sick of snow and cold!! and the fact that it makes my light bill horrendous having to run the heat so much!

My bitchfest for the day is ongoing from last week. After finding out that I wasn't getting the baby shower that my sil said she was having for me just because she didn't want to, I had a friend step up and say that she wanted to host one for us so that we would still get one with friends and family from my husbands hometown. I told her that DH and I would help with some of the costs and stuff because she is a single mother of two and doesn't need to pay for everything because showers can be expensive. So I went ahead and set up the event on Facebook to give people a heads up that the invitations would be in the mail soon. DH's aunt messaged me and asked why I was hosting my own shower and that I should have my friend host one for friends and then she would have one for us with family once the baby arrived. I told her that my friend was the one hosting not me and that I had just set up the event for her on fb. well I eventually ended up deleting the event off FB so it wouldn't stir any more drama or anything and decided just to send invitations to our friends instead. I told his aunt if she would like to have something after the baby is born then that was fine it would be fun. so we will see if that even happens. his family is very inconsistent on following through with plans like this so I am not getting my hopes up. I just don't get what the big deal is about having a shower before the baby is born and apparently his family is against that idea. I get people wanting to see the baby after she is born but they act like we all have to get together or I'm going to lock myself and the baby in our house and not let anyone see her. I don't really like the idea of her being passed around at a party right after she is born. Her immune system wont be super strong and she isn't a doll or anything like that. Am I wrong for feeling like that? Or does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?

I think I might just let this whole shower thing go and move on. I know you are disappointed but its not worth the stress or the mental energy. I agree though that I wouldnt have a party immediately after the baby is born. Wait until you feel ready. In the meantime, enjoy your pregnancy and focus on all the positive amazing things coming!! Hang in there!!

MegsB1112 · March 2015

My kids at school are being little beasts. I have two that throw tantrums, chairs, tables, scream, slam doors, and the list goes on. I am so beyond sick and tired of it. When they start to act up I can literally feel my blood pressure rise and get so angry with them. It's bad enough I have less patience than usual this year because of the pregnancy, but come on! I have no idea how my other 15 kids get any learning done whatsoever, because I feel like I hardly have time to teach them anything because I'm always dealing with the other two little shit heads. It's been non stop since October, and May cannot come soon enough! I can't wait to get out of my classroom this year (didn't think I'd ever say that)!

Also, I'm dealing with a dick land lord. I moved out in November and still have not gotten my security deposit back. So now I'm currently looking for lawyers, but have to be careful because I live in a small town and my previous land lord is a member of the "good old boys club" and I'm thinking most of the lawyers around here are too.

I've never had such a stressful year, and of course it's got to be during the time when I should have the least amount of stress possible. Poor baby!
Ok, done venting now!

sbride68 · March 2015

Thanks @lola2bee I think what bothers me most is that his family would act like this. I am trying to focus on the positives though from here on out. My friend is still wanting to have a shower with at least our friends so we will just get together with them and have fun. I guess if his family wants to be like that and miss out then that is their problem. Thank you though for helping me keep this in perspective

I really do appreciate it. I hope that your pregnancy is going good as well.

sbride68 · March 2015

MegsB1112 said:
My kids at school are being little beasts. I have two that throw tantrums, chairs, tables, scream, slam doors, and the list goes on. I am so beyond sick and tired of it. When they start to act up I can literally feel my blood pressure rise and get so angry with them. It's bad enough I have less patience than usual this year because of the pregnancy, but come on! I have no idea how my other 15 kids get any learning done whatsoever, because I feel like I hardly have time to teach them anything because I'm always dealing with the other two little shit heads. It's been non stop since October, and May cannot come soon enough! I can't wait to get out of my classroom this year (didn't think I'd ever say that)!

Also, I'm dealing with a dick land lord. I moved out in November and still have not gotten my security deposit back. So now I'm currently looking for lawyers, but have to be careful because I live in a small town and my previous land lord is a member of the "good old boys club" and I'm thinking most of the lawyers around here are too.

I've never had such a stressful year, and of course it's got to be during the time when I should have the least amount of stress possible. Poor baby!
Ok, done venting now!

Oh my! I hope that your classroom situation goes better soon! Also have you maybe looked for a lawyer outside of your town? That way they arent involved in the good ole boys club. I totally get that. We have that in our town as well. If you werent born here or dont have the money they do then you arent anything and if they do something wrong it is over looked but if we would do something wrong it is called out right away. I am so sorry you are dealing with a crappy landlord though

MissRissx3 · March 2015

I have one! Couldn't get through the day without one. My mother is so complicated .. and I mean super hard to handle. She has some issues with her mental health as well. That she should be taking medicine for, but decided alcohol was a better medicine. Anyways , she's been promising for weeks to go out with me and get the crib I picked out. Although I did NOT expect her to pay for it, she insisted. So a week went by and I asked "hey wanna go get it?" She says "yeah! But.. excuse excuse excuse" so I said "okay no big deal maybe next weekend." Next weekend came and now all of the sudden she wants to check into rehab? So now she can't pay for the crib, "YET." I told her I could buy it, it's not a huge deal! She insisted "No I want to buy it for you!" So I let it go for another week.. this weekend rolled around and I didn't even ask her. (Btw she never checked into rehab.) So I text her today and tell her I'm gonna buy it and its no biggy, but me and dh need to start getting her room together. She got so pissed and replied "going now, thought you should know." I said "No mom I'm getting it just calm down. Everything is fine relax." She is upset because of the crib I picked! $299 at target. She didn't wanna get that one.. yet she knew that's the one I've been eyeing this whole entire time. She claims it's too expensive and I could get a cheaper one somewhere else. That's not the point. the point is, I've been asking you for weeks and you've been blowing me off. Your boyfriend keeps telling me to shut up about it. And now you get upset with me when I tell you I'm buying our daughter a crib that I find suitable?! What the fuck?! She says "You still have two months." Do we know this for sure?! Is two months a LONG time for her?! Was she this unprepared for the arrival of me?! I just don't get her mindset.

AshSturgis · March 2015

My bitchfest is about DH today too! They must be getting to the crazy point in pregnancy. So the ONE thing my husband helps with more than I do is the laundry. It's down in the basement and he's always down there with his tools and working out so it's easier for him to finish loads and bring them back up and so on. I literally do everything else, which is fine I have absolutely no problem with. However DH always wants to give me crap about it (laundry). Today I got home from working a full time job, played with DD, cooked us all steak rice and broccoli for dinner, cleaned the kitchen and did the dishes (dishwasher has been broken for 6 months and we are waiting to buy another) mopped the floors, cleaned DD room, etc etc and he had the nerve to get angry bc after I finally got DD to bed and took a shower, I wasn't helping him fold laundry. Grrrrrrr. I felt like saying ok next time you help me scrub a toilet, I'll help you fold the laundry.

AshSturgis · March 2015

sbride68 said:
@PutMeInTheZoo I totally agree! I am sick sick sick of snow and cold!! and the fact that it makes my light bill horrendous having to run the heat so much!

My bitchfest for the day is ongoing from last week. After finding out that I wasn't getting the baby shower that my sil said she was having for me just because she didn't want to, I had a friend step up and say that she wanted to host one for us so that we would still get one with friends and family from my husbands hometown. I told her that DH and I would help with some of the costs and stuff because she is a single mother of two and doesn't need to pay for everything because showers can be expensive. So I went ahead and set up the event on Facebook to give people a heads up that the invitations would be in the mail soon. DH's aunt messaged me and asked why I was hosting my own shower and that I should have my friend host one for friends and then she would have one for us with family once the baby arrived. I told her that my friend was the one hosting not me and that I had just set up the event for her on fb. well I eventually ended up deleting the event off FB so it wouldn't stir any more drama or anything and decided just to send invitations to our friends instead. I told his aunt if she would like to have something after the baby is born then that was fine it would be fun. so we will see if that even happens. his family is very inconsistent on following through with plans like this so I am not getting my hopes up. I just don't get what the big deal is about having a shower before the baby is born and apparently his family is against that idea. I get people wanting to see the baby after she is born but they act like we all have to get together or I'm going to lock myself and the baby in our house and not let anyone see her. I don't really like the idea of her being passed around at a party right after she is born. Her immune system wont be super strong and she isn't a doll or anything like that. Am I wrong for feeling like that? Or does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?

I totally understand this, when DH and I were getting married my MIL insisted she was going to throw a shower for her side of the family bc our families love about 2-3 hours apart and it would be easier. After asking her for dates about 7 times in the months leading up to the wedding I finally said ok obviously you're not planning one and it's about a month before the wedding now so that whole idea is out the window. Fast forward to baby, she does the same thing again! She offers a baby shower with her family blah blah, never have heard a word about it since. My friend is throwing me one and I had her send MIL an invitation so we will see what she says this week when she receives it. Soooo frustrating. Like I don't care if you don't want to I never asked, but don't offer then back out!

BrooksManor · March 2015

My Monday was a life in general monday. Our water came back on Sunday, thank god. Week without water blows. So I was in a much better mood but it came crashing down about 8 am this morning. Lol had inspection at work and we normally have time but he showed up right than. We're all running around with brooms and stuff still cleaning up after 3rd shift. Our grocery truck showed up and every Damn pallet was a nightmare. I officially tipped over my first pallet unloading a truck. Than the pallets were in the way. Inspector still there, he sees. I'm like omg you realize this is a place of business things take time to do. I'm trying not to die. I get over heated and exhausted from all this crap. Only person who can unload the truck...ect. I survive long enough for lunch, I come back. Yet another truck....complete mess. Had to unload and reload it. Than do more running around trying to catch up on things. Utter chaos all day. Had to load up machinery for auction....how they wanted it loaded makes no sense. Ect ect. Typical monday. I was hoping for a job change but it's only available part time...can't take that now with H out of work.....

gherkins · March 2015

AshSturgis said:

sbride68 said:
@PutMeInTheZoo I totally agree! I am sick sick sick of snow and cold!! and the fact that it makes my light bill horrendous having to run the heat so much!

My bitchfest for the day is ongoing from last week. After finding out that I wasn't getting the baby shower that my sil said she was having for me just because she didn't want to, I had a friend step up and say that she wanted to host one for us so that we would still get one with friends and family from my husbands hometown. I told her that DH and I would help with some of the costs and stuff because she is a single mother of two and doesn't need to pay for everything because showers can be expensive. So I went ahead and set up the event on Facebook to give people a heads up that the invitations would be in the mail soon. DH's aunt messaged me and asked why I was hosting my own shower and that I should have my friend host one for friends and then she would have one for us with family once the baby arrived. I told her that my friend was the one hosting not me and that I had just set up the event for her on fb. well I eventually ended up deleting the event off FB so it wouldn't stir any more drama or anything and decided just to send invitations to our friends instead. I told his aunt if she would like to have something after the baby is born then that was fine it would be fun. so we will see if that even happens. his family is very inconsistent on following through with plans like this so I am not getting my hopes up. I just don't get what the big deal is about having a shower before the baby is born and apparently his family is against that idea. I get people wanting to see the baby after she is born but they act like we all have to get together or I'm going to lock myself and the baby in our house and not let anyone see her. I don't really like the idea of her being passed around at a party right after she is born. Her immune system wont be super strong and she isn't a doll or anything like that. Am I wrong for feeling like that? Or does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?
I totally understand this, when DH and I were getting married my MIL insisted she was going to throw a shower for her side of the family bc our families love about 2-3 hours apart and it would be easier. After asking her for dates about 7 times in the months leading up to the wedding I finally said ok obviously you're not planning one and it's about a month before the wedding now so that whole idea is out the window. Fast forward to baby, she does the same thing again! She offers a baby shower with her family blah blah, never have heard a word about it since. My friend is throwing me one and I had her send MIL an invitation so we will see what she says this week when she receives it. Soooo frustrating. Like I don't care if you don't want to I never asked, but don't offer then back out!

Sounds like something my MIL might do. She doesn't self medicate though, she prefers no treatment and making everyone else feel sorry for her. She did buy us a crib and mattress. It was used, which is no big deal, but it's missing some hardware that we can't find anywhere.

Luckily DH is handy, he will make it work.

Sorry you're having to deal with that drama. I've mostly been lucky in that the 1.5 hour drive to our place is too far for frequent interaction.

sbride68 · March 2015

AshSturgis said:

sbride68 said:
@PutMeInTheZoo I totally agree! I am sick sick sick of snow and cold!! and the fact that it makes my light bill horrendous having to run the heat so much!

My bitchfest for the day is ongoing from last week. After finding out that I wasn't getting the baby shower that my sil said she was having for me just because she didn't want to, I had a friend step up and say that she wanted to host one for us so that we would still get one with friends and family from my husbands hometown. I told her that DH and I would help with some of the costs and stuff because she is a single mother of two and doesn't need to pay for everything because showers can be expensive. So I went ahead and set up the event on Facebook to give people a heads up that the invitations would be in the mail soon. DH's aunt messaged me and asked why I was hosting my own shower and that I should have my friend host one for friends and then she would have one for us with family once the baby arrived. I told her that my friend was the one hosting not me and that I had just set up the event for her on fb. well I eventually ended up deleting the event off FB so it wouldn't stir any more drama or anything and decided just to send invitations to our friends instead. I told his aunt if she would like to have something after the baby is born then that was fine it would be fun. so we will see if that even happens. his family is very inconsistent on following through with plans like this so I am not getting my hopes up. I just don't get what the big deal is about having a shower before the baby is born and apparently his family is against that idea. I get people wanting to see the baby after she is born but they act like we all have to get together or I'm going to lock myself and the baby in our house and not let anyone see her. I don't really like the idea of her being passed around at a party right after she is born. Her immune system wont be super strong and she isn't a doll or anything like that. Am I wrong for feeling like that? Or does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?
I totally understand this, when DH and I were getting married my MIL insisted she was going to throw a shower for her side of the family bc our families love about 2-3 hours apart and it would be easier. After asking her for dates about 7 times in the months leading up to the wedding I finally said ok obviously you're not planning one and it's about a month before the wedding now so that whole idea is out the window. Fast forward to baby, she does the same thing again! She offers a baby shower with her family blah blah, never have heard a word about it since. My friend is throwing me one and I had her send MIL an invitation so we will see what she says this week when she receives it. Soooo frustrating. Like I don't care if you don't want to I never asked, but don't offer then back out!

So sorry you are going through this as well.

in laws can be so frustrating. I completely agree with your last sentence. I never asked them to host one, I was just going to put it all as one for the shower my friend is throwing me here but my sil threw a fit and wanted to throw one and mil thought it was a good idea and doable so I made the split on the guest list. So now that they backed out I have a friend who offered to throw a shower over there and it has now turned into friends only. I guess we will see if his aunt and his mom follow through on the after the baby showers. Not getting any hopes up though until I see an invitation. Not sure why in laws have to be like that. Hopefully your situation goes well for you.

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