Team Boy or Team Girl

AmommyB · February 2015

This is my first post to this forum. I'm 39 and 19 weeks along. Hubby and I have a 12 year old daughter and are making the baby journey all over again. This one was a happy surprise. We tried for years, lots of failed IUIS and three miscarriages so we thought that we were only meant for one child. So fast forward a few years and here we are!

So to my question, do any of you experience people in your life that are SO for one gender and not the other? My family and few close friends seem to think we really need a boy. My mom is all ready calling the babe HE. It's weird for me, I feel like there's going to be a huge letdown if I'm carrying a girl (even though I would love another girl.) At this point we are so happy to have another child, it could come out purple with blue polka dots and we would still be happy.

jerseygirl227 · February 2015

Welcome, and congrats!!!

I think (no, I know) my fiance was hoping for a boy. And I think my dad and brother might have been, too. But, we are having a girl (which I kinda felt all along).

Initially, I think there was a slight disappointment (and I think for my fiance it was because he thinks girls are harder); but, there is none now and hasn't been for some time. Everyone is very excited about our little Chloe.

Are you going to find out what you are having or will you wait?

AmommyB · February 2015

We are finding out this Wednesday and my daughter can hardly contain herself. My husband can't go with me so I'm letting her play hooky and go to the doc with me. I don't have a preference but feel like this one is a boy. My pregnancy has been totally opposite from my first but we shall see!

Congrats on your daughter, I love that name

NeonNoon · February 2015

Congratulations and welcome

My MIL has always wanted a daughter but only had 2 sons. So, she's been wanting a girl for the first grandchild. We're expecting a boy. She's already pushing a name for the next grandchild if it's a girl.

8-|

AmommyB · February 2015

I'm hoping everyone can get over whatever hang ups they have if we are having another girl. I have to say, I have loved having a daughter. I'm such a girly girl and we have so much fun. Having a boy would definitely be something new for us but that would be great too.

mdogan29 · February 2015

Congrats & welcome to the board! I would love to have 2 kids and I'm glad we're having a boy first (protective big brother - I hope) and hoping to have a girl with our next pregnancy -- if we're able to have another. We always thought we wanted girls and I was in shock for a while when I found out it was a boy (confirmed by both Mat21 test & ultrasound), but my hubby seems so excited now. Let us know if the results if you'd like to share and good luck either way!

AmommyB · February 2015

Thanks and I sure will

niknak1208 · February 2015

I don't think I've encountered that exactly but my mom and I were shopping for baby clothes last week. We took a vacation day and hit up all the resale shops and some other places. While we were at one of the shops, my mom said ugh I wish you were having a girl.

I said hey that's not nice!! I have a little girl.. she's 2 yrs old. Girl clothes are just fun and I think that's why she said it but still. Kinda bummed me out.

The only thing I pray for is that this baby is calm in nature. lol It's our third and it's a boy. Our son is 6 and he's just crazy .. allllll boy. Our daughter is 2 and she's so much more mellow and laid back.

AmommyB · February 2015

I agree girl clothes are a blast to shop for, but I like to think each gender has something really cool to offer. The only reason we are even finding out is so we wont have a bunch of green and grey clothes. As long as the sonogram says "healthy" we will be thrilled.

It did hurt my feelings a little hearing my mom hopes for a boy. I'm just hoping she gets over it because there's no exchanges lol.

cneiding · February 2015

I was so worried and stressed waiting for my genetic testing to come back just hoping to hear things looked healthy..I didn't really care boy or girl..this is my 8th and we have both boys and girls so no big deal. Well when I got the call from my dr office that there was no evidence of any trisomies etc I was crying from relief and happiness...also found out boy. I told my husband that everything looked good and it was a boy and he stomped his foot, rolled his eyes, grunted and said "I was hoping for a girl. Thats sure disappointing". I was so mad. How could he be disappointed in hearing "healthy"???

With my last pregnancy I didn't do any genetic testing so we found out sex at my ultrasound. My husband was debating if he would go to my appointment with me or not. His comment was "If I knew it was going to be a girl I would want to go with you to find that out. But...if its a boy who cares". He did go and it turned out we were not able to tell on ultrasound. About my due date he made a comment like "If its a boy I don't want it". Man I was so mad. It turned out it was a girl so he was happy.

KateLouise · February 2015

@cneiding is there a reason your DH prefers girls to boys? Just curious.

We've got two girls, so I'm expecting everyone to be all, "Oh I bet you're hoping for a boy." Especially my MIL because she's kind of annoying like that.

I think DH would like a boy just because he'd like a son. I'd actually prefer another girl, just because it feels familiar and comfortable (and we have a boat load of pink clothes) but I'm sure boys are fun too.

Like everyone else, a healthy baby is what really matters to me.

AmommyB · February 2015

I'm going in this morning for my anatomy scan, so will find out soon

I can't wait!

jerseygirl227 · February 2015

AmommyB said:

I'm going in this morning for my anatomy scan, so will find out soon I can't wait!

Can't wait to hear!

cneiding · February 2015

KateLouise said:

@cneiding is there a reason your DH prefers girls to boys? Just curious.

Well we always have more boys than girls even though we have both. WIth the last one we had 4 boys and 2 girls. Now we have 4 boys and 3 girls but this boy will make it 5 boys 3 girls. Also, because of room sharing arrangements Iguess. another girl would have balanced out the bedroom situation. But our kids have humongous rooms (they are like 30x20ft each and they have huge walk in closets too) so I don't think its a big deal . You could have like 12 beds in those rooms and still have room for other stuff. There is one smaller room but its still bigger than a lot of bedrooms I have seen...it doesn't have a walk in closet just a regular one...but it has its own full bathroom. Our oldest son has that one by himself.

Also, our boys are sort of ... well boys!!! When someone yells "what are you doing on that roof" I know they are not talking to one of the girls. One of ours has had stitches so many times I can't even recall how many times. Hope he never goes bald because there is sure to be A LOT of scarring underneath all that hair! They are louder, rougher and more daring than the girls.

The girls are much harder workers. My oldest daughter will just see things that need done around the house and do it...no need to ask her. She takes care of her younger siblings as instinct. My oldest son has to be asked 100 times to do things. The other boys think its unfair whenever they are asked to do anything. One feels he is our slave because he has to clean his room once a week. The oldest boy pretty much ignores his siblings even if they obviously need something and no one else is there to take care of them.

Also *I think* he feels that people expect him to have more of a share in the raising of a boy rather than a girl. Like people think he should be taking his boys out fishing and showing them how to rebuild a car engine or whatever. My husband is NOT going to do things like fish...and he has no patience to haul these boys around to instruct them on other things. SO with a girl he is more "off the hook" in their rearing.