Getting out of the house

vrae0606 · January 2015

My LO is 6wks 2 days. I'm just wondering is it just me or does trying to get out of the house & do errands with LO or trying to please people & meet them for lunch so they can meet baby overwhelming for anyone else? I feel so overwhelmed & defeated at the end of the day if I go anywhere. It just throws what semi normal routine I have with my DD. And co-workers have been bugging me since she was like 4 wks old to bring her to the office! Part of the problem is I pump exclusively (tried baby to breast for a couple of weeks & it was awful..that is a whole other story) so when I do get it out it throws the whole pumping schedule out of whack also. I feed DD on demand & sometimes that is every 2hrs sometimes longer. Another thing I need to overcome is that she is a spitter & I need to not be embarrassed if she spits all over someone or somewhere! I'm perfectly fine being a home body but I also am a people pleaser so I feel like I should go out and show DD off if they ask. Am I just being weird about not wanting to be out about at this age with DD? Have you had your baby out and about a lot by this point? I feel like friends & co-workers seem to think it is no big deal but it is to me! Tips or advice on making getting out of the house easier?

NELSMD · January 2015

I have not taken my LO out anywhere except the pediatrician and to meet his great grandparents. Not worth the risk before his vaccinations. Obviously, my reasoning is not really about the schedule, but I can see how going out would mess up your routine too.

klmurner · January 2015

I'm going through the same, but my babe is EFF, so I don't have a pumping routine to follow. However, I do get quite anxious when it comes to leaving. His sleep routine isn't real set yet, so I can't guarantee that he will sleep while I'm out. I've set rules for myself to keep my comfort level high... I don't meet large groups of people. I choose restaurants and other locales that are quiet. I don't stay out for more than a couple of hours, and I'm literally a hand sanitizer nazi. If they don't want to wash their hands, they don't get to touch him... And at 6 weeks, he hasn't caught anything yet... Thank goodness. I've made it a point to take him to my mom's office (she works in the hospital) once per week for lunch, and I actually feel safer there as all of her coworkers automatically sanitize.

Do what makes you comfortable. I never thought I'd be a germaphobe mom, but now that my baby dude is here, I don't care what anyone else says or who thinks it's silly... Them not washing isn't worth him getting sick.

Mrw218 · January 2015

I am ftm and have baby out and about with me a lot. I wash hands always have sanitizer attached to my purse. I bought covers and various outfits to help me bf somewhat discreetly in public. I refuse to be a prisoner in my own house as far as the schedule goes. Eventually I will be back at work and I can't conceivably stay in the house for the next year until he's done breastfeeding. Also life is always going to get in the way of the schedule. Are you gonna confine urself to the house til the kid is 5 and doesn't need naps anymore or even later til he has his own schedule independent of its?

iloveac · January 2015

@Ainslie325‌ that sounds about right for me.

feeshah · January 2015

Stop being a people pleaser. You and your baby come first.

april8416 · January 2015

I have been taking my bub out from Week 1 - they are mostly sleeping anyway! Now at 8 weeks he is awake longer and it is getting harder to schedule lunch/coffee dates - but I need my sanity also and just run with break of routine on those days. Do what's right for u and if u need to get out then just go out of routine that day and pick up again the day after. I always make sure he is fully fed before I leave the house and it has seemed to work. Coffee catch ups are best if u are feeling anxious - they are quick

ebilbao · January 2015

We go to the doc or to visit family and friends at their homes, but that's it. LO doesn't have his 2 month vaccs yet so I'm not risking it. In the end, it's going to be me up all night caring for a sick baby if he catches something, so I'm not shy about saying no.

MirandaAngie · January 2015

Same here I haven't taken my baby out. Just to his appointments and once to church. Too early for that specially with flu and measles going around in California im planing on stsring to take him places till he is 3 months

Mrw218 · January 2015

Totally agree with others about the ppl pleasing though. F them and do what you need to. Honestly i go out to regain sanity and not be stuck in my house but certainly not bc other ppl want me to meet them somewhere

DreDreM · January 2015

I know they are technically too small for a schedule, but my little guy (7 weeks) sleeps best at home. I also try to feed him before we leave the house and that seems to make any outing easier. I know it's tough if you're a people pleaser, but if someone really wants to see the baby they can come to you

BlueOrca · January 2015

I know how you feel!! I am almost exclusively pumping and I get so anxious in regards to my pumping schedule if I need to leave the house. We have only really taken our baby out of the house to go to the pediatrician. I refuse to take him to meet anyone before he gets his vaccinations - it's just not worth the risk. Don't worry about pleasing people. I have had a couple friends and family come to the house to see him, but I make sure no one is sick and they have to wash their hands as soon as they walk in the house!

Tarene · January 2015

Yes yes yes. also it doesn't make things easier being in the north east doesn't help the whole leaving the house thing - it's going to be 10 degrees here tomorrow.

mrsqdmitch · February 2015

I haven't gotten out much . Waiting on my LO to get vaccines. And it does seem like a bit much . One thing that does help is my portable bottle warmer when I do go out . I am really waiting for my LO to get a little older . I am sure that there a people who understand that. I have to do things in the best interest of my child.

nolanova85 · February 2015

I can understand your anxiety, but I like the suggestion above of starting with small trips. I would actually LOVE to get out more with LO, but we are a 1-car family and DH takes it to work. It's been too cold to even go for a walk most days. But you didn't mention - do you have an SO? Can you work it out to to some test trips out and about with your SO there to help? Even if s/he is just and inforcer reminding others to not touch the baby, having a team for the first few outings could help.

MirandaAngie · February 2015

@nolanova85‌ whats an so?

ColoradoBoat · February 2015

Agree with small steps, going through the drive through made me so happy at first:) I try to schedule coffees/lunches at least one a day. This is mostly for me--I am a very social person and need to get out if the house. I will also say that I am much Better and faster getting out of the house now then I was 2 weeks ago when I started this (LO is now 7 weeks). Do what makes you happy, and if you prefer to stay home, stay home.

RaeChay · February 2015

we've had to do grocery trips (obvs) and several trips to doctor's offices (ped for him, OB for me), and gone to a couple restaurants. He has a carseat cover and I don't really let people touch it to peek at him. Anyone who touches him washes their hands, and if they're currently sick they don't get to visit. If they have been sick within the last month but are better now, they wear a mask to visit.

The place I worry about most is the doctor's office for routine check ups. Fuck cold & flu season SO MUCH. I hate it. And all these anti-vax bastards & parents that didn't follow up on their kids' second MMR, allowing measles to spread. Clearly I can't talk about this.

kapio2012 · February 2015

We took our little one to church when he was 5 days old and have been out and about just as much as normal. We run errands, go to church and meetings, visit people, etc. We have a car seat cover and tried to limit the number of people holding and touching Jim for the first two months. I think it is healthy for the both of us to get out.

Kmm1023 · February 2015

We get out and about! I have an 8 year old no way can we be trapped in the house! I have learned when you do go out with LO don't be on any time constraints! That way if baby needs feed he gets fed, changed or just cuddled I stop what I am doing and do what needs done! It means that no trip is a quick trip but baby is happy and I keep my sanity by getting out! DH is also great at reading when I need to get out by myself!

MommyMoru · February 2015

We've been going out and about for about 3 weeks now and our LO is 2 months old. We just take precautions as best we can and always wash our hands. Plus we keep him covered as much as we can.

vrae0606 · February 2015

Thanks for the tips and encouragement ladies. Not sure getting out and about is going to get easier for me for a while but I do like the idea of taking my pump along and using it on battery power if we are going to be out for several hours. That way I don't have to be so stressed about messing up my pumping schedule. I've never gotten my milk to come in all that great but seem to get LO fed with breast milk if I keep on a good schedule so it is very important to me to do that. The whole germ thing?! Shoot, I'd never get out if I let that bug me. My MIL had me at a baby shower for LO when she was only 3 weeks old and got passed around soo much! My SO and I have taken LO out on several shopping trips and to restaurants. She has been to church with my in-laws and got passed around some more! I'm very very fortunate she hasn't gotten sick. And sure I can feed her before I go out but I have to hold her upright for 20-30 mins after each feeding due to reflux & spit up. I can't just feed her and get out the door 2 minutes later. I have fed LO several times in her car seat while SO is driving us home or to another destination or I've fed her if we are out to eat. Like some other poster said, no trip is going to be a quick trip anymore and I just need to realize that and go with the flow. I'm perfectly fine staying at home for several days in a row 24/7...maybe that is why I get so stressed going out with LO. I'm just wired that way. I'll get the hang of this mom thing eventually!

lana22 · February 2015

good luck! try to pump/feed right before you go out, and start out planning short trips. maybe start out doing something just you and the baby and then work up to meeting friends. don't feel bad, just do what's right for you.

teaismCAgal · February 2015

Hi all - we've been invited to a family member's birthday party this weekend (there will be kids and adults there). On one hand, we'd really like to go — but I'm still quite nervous about exposing our 12-week old baby to germs. My husband says it's time we get out of our "bubble" but the thought of LO getting sick makes my heart hurt. I should note, we live in Northern California, so measles has been a concern.

Is anyone else still struggling with taking their LO out?

jpagano113 · February 2015

Nope! It's -20f here where I live but I don't let that stop me. I bring her to the mall, family's house, run errands. I make sure no random ppl touch her. She's 13 weeks and hasn't gotten sick at all

Lauradi1010 · February 2015

My LO only leaves house to go to the doctor or the occasional family gathering. My hubby and I run errands in shifts. We don't think it's worth exposing baby to subzero temps & germs just yet. I am going a bit stir crazy as I am a stay at home mom. Once it stops snowing and warms up, I am sure I will get out more.

I do stress when I leave the house both with & without baby. I tried to exclusively pump after bf failed (a long stressful story), but need to supplement as well since LO wasn't getting enough milk from breast or pumping. Still pump about 6 times a day but used to do 8-9 times a day. The worry about missing a pump session gets to me even now.

As for the spitting up. Do not be embarassed. Warn your friends/family & Just pass off a spit cloth/ blanket to whoever holds her.

teaismCAgal · February 2015

Lauradi1010 - How old is your baby? We are 12 wks tomorrow, so I'm starting to feel like we need to start going out more.

Lauradi1010 · February 2015

I feel the same way as you do. He's 9 weeks. Just had his 2 month shots yesterday. I'm praying to get out next week since temps will finally be above zero. Just hoping the snow stays away. Last time it warmed up we got 14 inches. Then it cooled down and we got lake effect snow.

Not sure how many of you ladies are from the North East, but this weather may kill me.

Fossegirl1228 · February 2015

I am from the North East too (CT) and I have not been taking DD out very much. It's way too cold. We got out to the doctor and to visit the grandparents and that's about it. My MIL works part time so on the days she has off, she will baby sit so I can run errands and such. I can't wait for it to warm up so I can get LO into the sunshine.

Jeark1004 · February 2015

We're in the SE, so the weather isn't horrible. BUT I'm still a bit skeptical to go out on an outing with the LO, because every time we do go out (doctor's visits, target/mall, etc), my LO gets hysterical. He doesn't seem to like the car seat, throws a fit every time we come to a stoplight, which leads to misses naps, and an overtired baby by the end of the night. It just doesn't seem worth it to me for an hour outing. Is anyone else having the same issue? And for you STMs out there, please tell me they get used to car rides soon.....

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