September 2015 Moms

Telling the parents

so Im 21 and the pregnancy was by accident. It's nerve wrecking the idea of telling my parents, I know they'll be happy but disappointed because I'm still going to school for my nursing bs and this will just make it harder. How or when should I tell them, after the third month?

Re: Telling the parents

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  • I am the dad haha I wanted an app that would give me info about this whole baby thing but yeah but yeah I just don't know when I'll be comfortable just don't want to wait too long either. But yeah don't think my parents will be mad
  • There is no right time, a lot of people chose to wait until after 12 weeks because the risks of miscarriage drop dramatically, but only you and your girl know when its the right time for you. You sound like such a responsible man (otherwise you wouldn't have this app!) that I'm sure your parents trusts your judgement and will be there to support you both during the pregnancy and when the baby arrives. Good luck :)
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  • I'm 29 and was scared to tell my parents. I'm trying to go back to school and I didn't want them to be disappointed. My mom's reaction wasn't great but now it's been 2 weeks and she's really coming around. If you don't get the reaction you want, give them time. Good luck.
  • I was so worried about telling my parents I was beyond stressed out. My boyfriend and I aren't married , this is an unplanned pregnancy and I amn't where I thought I'd be when I had my first child (we don't own our own house, we rent and will have to move into something smaller once the baby comes as my boyfriend barely earns minimum wage) I was so sure they would be disappointed in me and felt like I had let them down.
    I was actually so anxious I had panic attacks for the first time in years. I had myself worked up into a right state :( I visited my GP at 10 weeks and told her about my fears and she advised me that a baby is a blessing, I wasn't going to be telling them I was terminally I'll, quite the opposite!
    I still waited until I was 12 weeks and we had gotten our first ultrasound and then I broke the news...
    Their reaction couldn't have been better- they are so, so delighted, as is my boyfriends mum. I wish I had told them sooner and saved myself and my baby so much stress. They haven't even said anything about us not being married and have said we have their full support, that a baby is a blessing and they will do anything they can to help us. So altho I know we have a lot to sort out in the next few months I feel that with their support it's all doable and most importantly, I can enjoy the fact that I'm pregnant now. :)
    I hope your parents react as well as my did!
  • I was terrified to tell my parents too and I'm 28, done with school and have a full time decent job, but my significant other and I are not married which I knew would be the first thing they brought up. This might sound weird, but I also couldn't get out of my head that I was basically telling my parents we had sex 5 weeks prior lol. I'm so close to them though and couldn't keep it from them for long. I spilled it early at 5 weeks mainly because I knew I was going to need/want my parents emotional support. They were sooo excited! They did ask when we are getting married and irritatingly continue to do so, but they are stoked to have a grand baby and haven't been anything but amazing and supportive. 

    Your parents love you and will love your baby too even if its not their idea of ideal timing. Whenever you are ready is the right time to tell them. 
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  • Disappointing them stinks. But you're 21 and sounds to me like you plan on being a kick butt dad. Have you guys told her parents yet?
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Well I'm 20, and I can tell yoy my experience, although of course every family is different (:
    I'm in school full-time, and my boyfriend and I have already had hurdles to overcome (not relationship one, but ones relating to finances, etc.). I knew my parents wouldn't love the timing, but they ended up seeing it the same way as I do and are over the moon excited. One way or another, that baby is coming into this world. We can choose to get upset because the timing isn't spot on or things won't be perfectly easy (which they never are anyhow), or we can recognize that a baby is a wonderful thing. It's hard to not be excited when there's a baby, even if things aren't perfectly in the plan. If you think it's right for you, try giving them the benefit of the doubt and telling them early on, chances are they'll want to share in this with you.
  • di3go13 said:

    I am the dad haha I wanted an app that would give me info about this whole baby thing but yeah but yeah I just don't know when I'll be comfortable just don't want to wait too long either. But yeah don't think my parents will be mad

    This makes me smile..I feel like the fact that you're in nursing school and knowing that at least upon completion will be able to support your child will "soften the blow." Because you will have a flexible career where you will always have work and can grow in your career (I'm an RN too) and I think it's uber cute that we have a dad on here with us.
  • I am 27, 24 when I got pregnant with my first owned a home, had a good job and was still nervous to tell my parents! Lol my brother and his gf are expecting and got a totally different reaction from my parents than I did, they haven't been dating that long.. But in the months since telling them my parents have come around a bit. Every experience is different, as long as you and your gf are happy that's what is most important. A baby is always a blessing!
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