Comments from other people!

derijl2 · February 2015

Hey all--occasional lurker, first time poster. Due 7/12.

So far I'm doing and feeling well. I need advice on how to cope with other people's comments about my pregnant body! I work in a large workplace (hospital) and it feels like people are commenting all day long. Most innocuous stuff like "Oh you're showing," some compliments, but two people have asked if I'm having twins! WTF!

I'm really anti-people commenting on other peoples' bodies (I just think it's rude and unnecessary) normally and it's like 1000x worse now that I'm visibly pregnant. The comments are hurtful occasionally but mostly I'm just having trouble containing my anger that people feel so entitled to constantly comment. I don't really play along or act like it's okay but I do have to stay professional.

Any tips for dealing with this, or maybe for just getting over it?? (Because we all know it's about to get worse!) Thanks and congratulations to everyone.

kaylacrain · February 2015

I work in a large retail store and am over weight already, have been all my life and a lady I have worked with for almost 7 years looked at my stomach and asked if I was showing yet. I said considering I've looked like this for 25 years....no...I feel like rude comments deserve an equally rude response.

hay1122 · February 2015

People are excited about pregnancy and babies. Try not to let their comments get under your skin, they are just trying to share with you. Especially at the end of pregnancy there's no ignoring a pregnant belly. Usually just giving a short, but polite response will close the conversation quickly.

ipumpkin · February 2015

I've learned to take it with a grain of salt. People are stupid, ignorant and inconsiderate.

JHaworth84 · February 2015

ipumpkin said:
I've learned to take it with a grain of salt. People are stupid, ignorant and inconsiderate.

This.

Unfortunately your body is the part of you that is laid bare for the world to see and that world (in the majority at least) feels it is ok to make open judgements about us based on that part alone. As your pregnancy goes along you will actually find that pretty much everything people say to you is a load of nonsense and actually can be a great source of personal amusement 'you're bump is huge', 'you're hardly showing', 'you're carrying all on your front', 'you're carrying low', 'you're glowing'... Lol!

Take no notice and be on the guard for people who randomly think it is ok to touch your bump uninvited- that really is a nuisance!!! Xx

JHaworth84 · February 2015

Oh and if it makes you feel better I currently work on the ICU with around 150 nurses (male and female) and as its my third the comments have moved away from my bump and more like 'we saved that male catheter for you- you obviously know what you're doing'!!!

xx

nimble33 · February 2015

Shame it's not perfectly reasonable to smack people in the face when they mention stuff like this -.- I'm massive and feel uncomfortable most of the time and have already started waddling

and the looks from people when I'm out and about makes me want to hide at home and never leave.

307040 · February 2015

I m due 16th July and on the last two weeks had three people ask if it's twins

inLOVEalready715 · February 2015

Just start crying so they feel terrible for saying anything at all

lindsaypkelly · February 2015

My problem isn't with the comments about my belly size (although they are getting old) it's with the inappropriate questions and comments
- are you excited/happy?
- I didn't even know you had a boyfriend.

I can't believe the things that come out of people's mouths sometimes.

NewMumzy25 · February 2015

nimble33 said:
Shame it's not perfectly reasonable to smack people in the face when they mention stuff like this -.- I'm massive and feel uncomfortable most of the time and have already started waddling and the looks from people when I'm out and about makes me want to hide at home and never leave.

I agree.
I'm bigger as it is and work in daycare some of the parents who find out I'm pregnant say stuff like "oh I didn't know you can't tell yet. .." I would love to smack a few people but I have to stay professional (sadly) and I waddle now and too more so when I'm accommodating the slippery areas outside but I hate the stares and some of the comments.

For some reason people just think it's okay to comment in your body especially if you're visibly pregnant.

ashleytiff · February 2015

I've gotten "oh I didn't know you were married" from an older couple that comes to my work.

lindsaypkelly · February 2015

ashleytiff said:
I've gotten "oh I didn't know you were married" from an older couple that comes to my work.

I just find that so deeply offensive and I don't see the girl who said that to me in the same way anymore.

1. What if i didn't have a boyfriend/husband?
2. So what if I don't!

kinnieloo · February 2015

I've gained 15 pounds and people say "you don't even look pregnant! You look the same "! Pffftttt so does that mean I already looked like a whale before I felt like one lol!?

lilweenie · February 2015

I've had all that said to me too. Honestly it doesn't really bother me. People like to make small talk, and most of the time they don't mean anything by it.

derijl2 · February 2015

Oh thank you all so much. It's nice to just commiserate. My husband is helpful but it's nice to know that other people are going through the same thing and not everyone wants to just lie there and take it ;-) LOL about the catheter @the icu nurse!

derijl2 · February 2015

kinnieloo said:
I've gained 15 pounds and people say "you don't even look pregnant! You look the same "! Pffftttt so does that mean I already looked like a whale before I felt like one lol!?

Yes! I'm like nooo I was much thinner before this 3/4 lb baby attached itself to my front side along with giant boobs and a rapidly expanding uterus.

shay092185 · February 2015

I wear scrubs a lot soo although I have a belly u dont really notice it yet but sometimes it sticks out and I can see ppl starring trying to figure it out soooo I typically throw n a joke and they quickly stop...its helpful to have a joke stash...honestly this isnt as bad as when the baby comes and ppl keep asking if its a boy or girl (like the all pink means nothing) or random strangers try to touch ur child! Its getting u used to dealing with crazy folks.

jonesy15 · February 2015

It's like you become public property when you become pregnant.
I find the worst bit is when people start touching your belly. I'm not the most tactile person in the world but this really freaks me out.
Hands off the bump!
Xx

ashleytholund · February 2015

I'm pretty small anyway and I'm not showing much (it's my first) on top of that it's freezing cold here so I've been wearing hoodie and long sleeved ts at work. Some lady the other day asked me if I was still pregnant. I was like uhm.. first of all yes. Second of all what exactly were you planning to say if I said no?? Luckily it was someone I liked so we could laugh it off, but if it was a customer I hated there's no doubt I would have lit them up like an xmas tree! I'm @ 18 weeks and moody! Lol

biaromoy · February 2015

For me I hate the oh you're barely showing for being 5 months and my hubby said my bump shrank heaps when I lied down and your belly isn't even hard... It hurts cause I wanna have that beautiful baby belly

derijl2 · February 2015

ashleytholund said:
I'm pretty small anyway and I'm not showing much (it's my first) on top of that it's freezing cold here so I've been wearing hoodie and long sleeved ts at work. Some lady the other day asked me if I was still pregnant. I was like uhm.. first of all yes. Second of all what exactly were you planning to say if I said no?? Luckily it was someone I liked so we could laugh it off, but if it was a customer I hated there's no doubt I would have lit them up like an xmas tree! I'm @ 18 weeks and moody! Lol

...Yep. have been asked if I'm still pregnant. So tacky. :-(

kcloyal · February 2015

I was really angered by all of those questions in my first pregnancy but this time around they don't seem to bother me. Not only that I am havin twins and no one has said that to me. Maybe I should be mad! Honestly I think people are trying to be funny or start conversations.

GSUDavis · February 2015

The biggest issue that I'm having is people talking about how I'm "still not showing". Ordinarily I would be excited that I'm not "looking fat" or bloated. My boss is also expecting and is 3 weeks behind me. She's been showing for weeks and weeks now. Everyone at the office is like, "she's BEHIND you!?! OMG!" and I'm yea, different bodies I guess. But it's really annoying. I'm 21 weeks now and want to have that oh-so-obviously pregnant baby belly.

I even had a sale clerk at Baby's-R-Us laugh in my face when I told her I was adding to *my* registry. She said "you're getting started early aren't you?" and I said no, I'm right at 5 months. And she said, "NO you're not!!", laughed and walked away. I was like WTF b*tch!?! I wanted to complain to store management but was so hurt I just left the store. =(

shortyk14 · February 2015

For me it's not really the "oh wow are you having twins" comments or the "wow your belly is huge". It's the "hey fatty" comments. Or because it's our third I get asked if I'm getting my tubes tied or what is wrong with us.. We didn't learn the first two times. It's like mind your own business as to our sex life and how I'm going to prevent pregnancy later on. Wait until you get closer to delivery..I honestly had random people asking if I was dialated at all!! People are just rude sometimes and super nosey

ChristyM87 · February 2015

GSUDavis said:
The biggest issue that I'm having is people talking about how I'm "still not showing". Ordinarily I would be excited that I'm not "looking fat" or bloated. My boss is also expecting and is 3 weeks behind me. She's been showing for weeks and weeks now. Everyone at the office is like, "she's BEHIND you!?! OMG!" and I'm yea, different bodies I guess. But it's really annoying. I'm 21 weeks now and want to have that oh-so-obviously pregnant baby belly.
I even had a sale clerk at Baby's-R-Us laugh in my face when I told her I was adding to *my* registry. She said "you're getting started early aren't you?" and I said no, I'm right at 5 months. And she said, "NO you're not!!", laughed and walked away. I was like WTF b*tch!?! I wanted to complain to store management but was so hurt I just left the store. =(

Wow. That is rude. I would still complain, you could always email or call

GSUDavis · February 2015

ChristyM87 - I really should have but it's been a couple of weeks now and I don't even know the lady's name. If I go back there and happen to see her, I will make a complaint at that time. But I really hope I don't ever see her again. lol

LBland09 · February 2015

I have run into the same thing except I'm a music director at a church and people from church...mostly men who don't think first, have made comments like "Wow!!" While motioning with their hands that my belly has grown.

smccall3838 · February 2015

Agreed, and love the responses. My biggest pet peeve is a not-so-close co-worker saying, "you're getting so big!" Uggh. And although DH loves my pregnant body (now), he says, "Look what I did to you!"

What really pissed me off too is ladies guessing I'm having a boy because I'm "all belly." The anatomy scan clearly shows "girl." So I've just been wearing more pink, coral, and brighter colors. Makes me feel more...vibrant.

beccer123 · February 2015

I haven't had this experience yet. I haven't really grown much, I guess. But I will say not everyone knows how to say what they are thinking in a positve way. They are sometimes nosey/curious.

zmombie · February 2015

Hm.. Well yea your going to have to just deal with it.. But I can't say "get over it" its a problem for you. While it may not bother some.. It does you. Hell, it seriously annoys me if someone tells me what to name my kid... Huge issues with it.. Where others ask for name suggestions. We're all sensitive in our own ways. My best advice is to prepare yourself for everyone to comment and just be ready to smile and nod it off.. If it's people your close to, tell them how you feel. If it comes across bitchy just say "sorry, hormones"
I get really really big during pregnancy.. And I have big babies.. So I'm asked all the time it its twins (which yea that's rude.. And annoying.) just because your bigger (or smaller for some women) then what they think you should be, they think they can remark on it. I like the "oh your bellies so cute" type comments.. Not the "good god how many you got in there" kind.. I then reply with, "just one.. But I ate the last asshole to say I was to big"

hwood5 · February 2015

I hate when I hear "Hey fatty" and "wow, you're getting fat". First of all, they know i'm pregnant and it's not fat. Second of all, it's rude to say to someone no matter if they are pregnant or not. Pregnancy is not a free pass for people to comment on my body.

lcronk7014 · February 2015

Can't believe they said that

derijl2 · February 2015

zmombie said:

Hm.. Well yea your going to have to just deal with it.. But I can't say "get over it" its a problem for you. While it may not bother some.. It does you. Hell, it seriously annoys me if someone tells me what to name my kid... Huge issues with it.. Where others ask for name suggestions. We're all sensitive in our own ways. My best advice is to prepare yourself for everyone to comment and just be ready to smile and nod it off.. If it's people your close to, tell them how you feel. If it comes across bitchy just say "sorry, hormones" I get really really big during pregnancy.. And I have big babies.. So I'm asked all the time it its twins (which yea that's rude.. And annoying.) just because your bigger (or smaller for some women) then what they think you should be, they think they can remark on it. I like the "oh your bellies so cute" type comments.. Not the "good god how many you got in there" kind.. I then reply with, "just one.. But I ate the last asshole to say I was to big"

HAHAHHAHA. You're awesome.

Great attitude.

zmombie · February 2015

Lol I try

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